To think 3 days compassionate leave is appalling

[flipflop00]

How much do you think people should be given?

Could you step in and approach her line manager (I'm assuming you work with her) Sometimes individuals get lost in big organisations until situations get highlighted.

I didn't need it explaining, so please don't use a collective 'we'.

You are absolutely right, 3 days isn't close to enough. I was 21 when I lost my mum and I needed several weeks before I could face working again, before I could be reasonably sure that I wouldn't just break down in tears at the drop of a hat.

Does she only get SSP at work?

The company doesn't give sick leave so it would be statutory sick leave. The boss is an awful person, very unsympathetic and sees her employees as nothing more than cogs that keep her business turning

Our is a joke.
I day and upto 3 at your managers discretion to allow in the event if a spouses death to arrange child care!

Unlimited where I work, I took 3 weeks when I lost my parent. It wasn't long enough. I could and should have taken longer

I'm not explaining anything to you, and I will use whatever language I want to. I'm not going anywhere.

Don't be so patronising.

If my grandma passed away I’d be filled with shock. 3 days is nowhere near enough

It's the owner of the (small) company who has said 3 days. She has lavish houses abroad and three homes in the uk and does very well for money. While her employees all work on minimum wage

Doesn't sound like a great working environment. Is staff turnover high?

Maybe a rather churlish employer.

In this case, 3 days isn’t enough at all. And obviously wouldn’t be enough if your partner or child died.

However, unfortunately a lot of people nowadays just seem to have no resilience at all. Days off for pets dying is ridiculous and weeks off for grandparents too.

My dad died when I was in my twenties, and my employer gave me the day off to go to the funeral.

She's an adult, can't she take some annual leave or get a gp's note if she's struggling?

How much the company earns is irrelevant. And to be honest, I found the routine of work helped me more than being around people who made a dreadful fuss.

@ThatEdgyFeeling I didn't need it explaining, so please don't use a collective 'we'.

Thank you! Baffles me that that was the part she's fixated on

Of course the employer should be compassionate and adjust to the circumstances as much as possible. Is the young woman in question having to deal with the funeral arrangements, will, estate and probate?

I lost my mother in my early 20s, I do understand. I had to take unpaid leave and did not qualify for any compassionate leave. The whole of the funeral arrangement fell on my shoulders, I was sole executor of the will, inherited a mortgage I couldn’t pay and had to dissolve the estate including selling two properties. It was a lot. I got into a lot of debt at the time, because who can suddenly take on the bills for another household and take unpaid leave simultaneously? There wasn’t much time for actual grieving it was all about having time to arrange the practicalities.

I am sorry for this young woman but I do not know what the right answer is.

My (ex) employer gave zero days and only ssp, some employers are just shit.

For a parent I think it’s 5 days at my company and option to give 5 more days with discretion. I think that’s a reasonable amount of paid leave to be given and sick leave if you need more time off.

The issue is the country is in financial crisis. Ssp is not enough to survive on, and we're weeks away from the end of year so no annual leave left to take. Company policy does not allow her to draw from next years holiday. So really her options are return after 3 days, or take ssp which is £90 a week- nowhere near enough with the current cost of living crisis.

Depends on relationship and cause of death (ie. Sudden verses long illness you prepare for)

you might think you can prepare for the death of a loved one, but their actual loss still hits you like a herd of elephants.

OP - your colleague is going to be in shock, poor girl. She is probably reeling from this and her grief. It seems pretty common to have to wait at least a week for a funeral. Might be longer if there is a PM. IME the period between death and the funeral you are in a sort of limbo. You can’t move to the next stage of your grief.

could you go to your boss and advocate for your colleague? Is she in a union?

Yes she's in charge of funeral arrangements although she has support with that. But a lot of organising and sorting is falling on her.
I'm so sorry for what you went through, that sounds absolutely awful and so much responsibility for such young shoulders x

Yeah the stattuory leave isnt enough at all for anyone tbh-i read about a man who had lost his son wanted the law changed but i dont know whow that went

We have 3 days for extended family which can be extended at manager's discretion & 15 for immediate family. I still don't think it's enough in a lot of circumstances.

If I were you I would encourage her to get a sick cert.

Yeah there will be a pm due to the sudden circumstances. So things will be a bit delayed.
She's not in a union, and I am the one in contact with her boss as she's just not able to do it right now x

So your best friend dies and you just carry on as normal....

Been there and it's not easy. I did work but was utterly useless.

Yanbu. My work’s compassionate leave is 1 day. I got signed off for a month by my GP.
In that time I gained a new manager who was absolutely disgusted at the 1 day compassionate leave and she is currently changing it. Funnily enough, I’ve mentioned other things and she’s implementing and changing those.
It should be on a case by case basis. Maybe your grandmother was like a mum to you and so on.

I think having three days as standard is okay. What isn’t okay is not giving sick pay. It’s inhumane and ensures sick people come to work and get everyone else sick.

Is this a UK company? The UK seems to be becoming more inhumane as time goes by. It’s sad to see.