To ask HOW he/they or she/they works?

[Henuinequest]

On a DE&I video call at work and the session panel did intros with pronouns stated - 2 of them said ‘I’m he/them’ and one said ‘she/they’. All panellist were trans identifying.

asking a practical question - if someone is he/ them, I’m fine just to to refer to him as he or him? As in ‘ let’s wait 2 mins to see if Josh is coming. He said he could make it’ or I’m I supposed to be saying them ??
the panel was all about trans day of remembrance or something like that so it didn’t feel appropriately to start asking them…

I'm sorry, did they cancel International Women's Day in order to make room on the calendar for Trans Remembrance Day?

I avoided asking this on the feminist boards not wanting to have the original post derailed with the usual trans hatred that lurks there under the guise of womens rights.

It was established in 1999.

I actually have great difficulty using preferred pronouns. I am autistic, and using wrong-sex pronouns is incredibly difficult and means I end up not able to talk or join in.
i agree that it’s really difficult. I also don’t think it’s particularly good for your brain and mental health to feel compelled to refer to something that your brain doesn’t compute or recognise. If my brain interprets that Sam is male, but Sam asks to be referred to as she/her, then I’m constantly going to be on guard to say something I don’t properly believe, which really is not how our senses and brains operate.

From the article, written by a mother of a trans person:

“This reduces the total to nine unlawful deaths, all of whom were born male. (By contrast, the number of homicides committed by transgender people between 2008 and 2017 was 12.) For context, the number of women killed by men during the same period was 1800. So much for our alleged “cis-privilege”.”

That is some shocking perspective.

Trans hatred? I don't see women screaming threats of rape, murder, spitting and shouting down transpeople, it's always the other way round. Right minded women just want their rights and safety upheld and not trampled on

Well it’s not “trans hatred” is it OP? It’s just people who don’t want to go along with this complete cobblers. For he/they and she/they, just calling them ‘self-obsessed’ should cover it.

I know a fair few trans people and I've never seen them do any of that.

How do pronouns work in other countries like france? Presumedly you change the endings of words too or do they not bother with such tosh in france?

You’ve missed the huge number of transwomen being celebrated on IWD then?
You've missed how women are threatened for wanting IWD to be about, you know, women?

I’m so thoroughly sick of this dick pandering that actively harms women and children.

I think you get that on every board on here unfortunately.

As a grammar pedant this annoys me immensely. He- Subject pronoun, performs the action. Him- Object pronoun, receives the action. You need a PAIR of subject/object pronouns. He/Him, She/Her and They/Them are all appropriate subject/object pairs. She/They is two subject pronouns, not a subject/object pair. As such it is grammatically incorrect.

I’d also like to add - as this thread has already been derailed - trans people are less likely to be murdered than the average U.K. citizen, but they’re more likely to experience violent crime as a whole. So they’re not “the safest” demographic. It’s not that clear cut. In relation to the original post, I think everyone’s pronouns include “they”. I often use they to refer to an individual person, especially if I don’t know them and they have a unisex name or if it’s difficult to judge their gender from looking at them. If someone’s pronouns are he/they, I’d call them he the majority of the time, but make a conscious effort to use they.

@Schlaar love it!
is this the time to link to Pronouns are Rohypnol?
fairplayforwomen.com/pronouns/

Just ask them. They can explain and will answer any follow up question you have.

"more likely to experience violent crime as a whole"

Bullshit.

Source?

Cause the ONS would absolutely disagree with that.

I hadn't though of this. I want my DD to trust her instinct; using the wrong pronouns desensitises it.

‘Just ask them. They can explain and will answer any follow up question you have.’

at least one of the he/ theys appears to be a heterosexual, white, bearded man in his 20s. So I’m not sure I’d have the patience to actually have him explain this to me - a gay woman with much experience of homophobia.
I just don’t want the pronoun police after me …

It’s difficult as there’s little statistics available, however here’s an estimate from channel 4 www.channel4.com/news/factcheck/factcheck-how-many-trans-people-murdered-uk Most crime against trans people is unreported, which skews the figures. Here’s a study in the US williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/

@SiobhanSharpe I don’t object to correct subject/object pairs such as She/Them or Him/Them or They/Her etc. What I object to is when a person states two subject pronouns and no object pronouns.

If someone says their pronouns are She/They it’a incorrect because it’s two subject pronouns. So what do I say when I need to use an object pronoun? Neither “I gave it to She” nor “I gave it to They” works as a sentence!

www.surrey.ac.uk/news/trans-people-and-cisgender-gay-men-uk-are-most-likely-experience-violence There’s also this