...to ask what my wife's thought process is, in this situation?

[WalkingOnTheCracks]

Married twenty years. Pretty early on I mentioned that I don't like v-neck jumpers. I mean, it's not a huge deal. It wasn't mentioned in the wedding speeches. It's not something I felt I had to get straight even before we got serious. It's just one of those things that comes up at some point, and it came up within the first year or so, I guess.

But every couple of years, my wife will buy me a v-neck jumper for Christmas. I open it and I don't need to say anything, because she gets in first.

"I know it's a v-neck, but it's such a lovely blue!"

"I know you don't like v-necks, but it's cashmere!"

"...it's just perfect for your eye colour."

"...I thought you could wear it to Sally and Mike's next week."

"...it's from Harrods!"

They always end up being taken back.

But - leaving aside the question of why I don't like v-necks, which I think I'm allowed - what I'm interested to know is what she's thinking when she buys them. Does she think, "Well, this one's just irresistible. Even WoTC will love this." Or does she just think that my aversion to v-necks is a passing phase? Or not worthy of consideration?

She doesn't like sarongs. If I persisted in the attempt to buy her a sarong every other Christmas, there'd be ructions.

Why does she keep at it?

He's talked to her. Endlessly. She won't even engage with the idea that she might be batshit to keep buying him v-necks.
Seriously, the guy's baffled.
OP - BUY THE WOMAN A WHOLE SUCESSION OF SARONGS, BLUE ONES, GREEN ONES, COTTON ONES, SILK ONES, PATTERNED ONES AND PLAIN ONES.

It’s just lazy present buying

I love your username @ChessieFL - I think you have cherubic curls, a body to die for and a sad past, amirite?!

It's her futile attempt to control you. Do NOT give in. Buy her some really cheap, nasty, slutty underwear that you know she'll hate.

Maybe she has absolutely no idea what to buy you, panics and just gets a V neck.
Perhaps pick a present and say you would like that instead of another jumper.

I never know what to buy my DH so for his last birthday he told me he wanted a hedge trimmer, so I dutifully got him one.

🙄

What do you buy her ?

Is it constantly things she doesn't like ?

No, no. Not the only present. It'll be one of a few.

The idea that she thinks it would look good on me, and might make me more attractive, is one that worries me a bit. I'd like to think that my attractiveness doesn't come down to the design of the neck of a jumper. And if it has echoes of a former and formative crush...well, not sure that that's an idea that can be pursued to any useful conclusion.

Is she otherwise reasonable and attentive? I know people who would do this because they never listen to anything other than the sound of their own voice, but this shows in other areas of life as well.

Could she have had a bet with your mother 20 years ago?

Otherwise #teamsarong

Agree it's time to buy her a sarong. Have it on standby just in case. The minute she hands over the v neck, you hand over the sarong.

Well, it sounds like she cares more about seeing you in what she likes than what you like. Which sucks.

I had a boyfriend who would buy me clothes and make-up in his taste. He was very controlling in other ways too. Is this the only thing controlling she does or is there other things, if you're honest with yourself?

I could understand her trying it once not realising how serious you are but im afraid I don't know why she seems to think she knows best here when she clearly doesn't. I guess it's an odd thing to have strong feelings about, but even so it isn't very nice to keep buying your husband presents he won't like!

Maybe she works full time, is knackered to the point of exhaustion and really cannot be arsed with Christmas shopping amongst all the other shit she has to do and V Necks are the first jumpers that come up on the M & S website.

Adds another zip funnel neck blue jumper to Next basket

She’s trying tO test your boundaries and see how much she can push. She doesn’t respect you.

Maybe she has absolutely no idea what to buy you, panics and just gets a V neck.

So panicked she forgets the existence of crew necks?

I've no idea why she's got this weird v neck fixation OP. Have you tried asking her to find you a nice crew necked jumper or a cardigan or ... anything specific you'd like that isn't a v neck.

OP, when you eventually get to the bottom of this, can you let me know? It might shed some light on why my MIL often buys me slippers, despite the fact that she knows I don't wear slippers.

Take a pair of scissors to the next one she buys you, Do it infront of her, that should put a stop to it
Always happy to help with marital advice

She keeps buying them because she wants you to wear them, and what she wants is more important to her than what you want.

It's really as simple as that.

Are the v necks given randomly or just on birthdays and christmas. Because I'm thinking if they are given to you randomly, perhaps think back to anything you might have done to annoy her over the couple of weeks before hand. It could be her way of evening the score.
As in, Ha you left your dirty rotten socks on the bathroom floor for 3 days DH. But I'll show you! Have a V-neck fucker!

Or she just thinks you'll look really good in a v-neck and hasn't yet given up being able to break you!

Agree with this. Or any other item she particularly dislikes. As a woman I can’t answer why she’s still doing it after all this time as I wouldn’t, I’d be embarrassed to keep buying someone (no matter who they are) something I know they don’t like.

I'm sorry, this is the universal sign your MIL hates you.

Sorry, I couldn't resist 😂

She likes men in v neck clothes and secretly hopes you'll give in and wear one.

@Cafenero35 🙄Right back at you, pal.

...totally fair. If she bought me slippers for Christmas, the divorce papers would be filed before the leftover turkey was finished.

OP - whatever item of clothing she really dislikes for herself, buy it and keep on buying it. Birthdays, Christmas....

She's not listening to you. Does she do that a lot (or not do that, whatever the correct way to phrase it is?)