...to ask what my wife's thought process is, in this situation?

[WalkingOnTheCracks]

Married twenty years. Pretty early on I mentioned that I don't like v-neck jumpers. I mean, it's not a huge deal. It wasn't mentioned in the wedding speeches. It's not something I felt I had to get straight even before we got serious. It's just one of those things that comes up at some point, and it came up within the first year or so, I guess.

But every couple of years, my wife will buy me a v-neck jumper for Christmas. I open it and I don't need to say anything, because she gets in first.

"I know it's a v-neck, but it's such a lovely blue!"

"I know you don't like v-necks, but it's cashmere!"

"...it's just perfect for your eye colour."

"...I thought you could wear it to Sally and Mike's next week."

"...it's from Harrods!"

They always end up being taken back.

But - leaving aside the question of why I don't like v-necks, which I think I'm allowed - what I'm interested to know is what she's thinking when she buys them. Does she think, "Well, this one's just irresistible. Even WoTC will love this." Or does she just think that my aversion to v-necks is a passing phase? Or not worthy of consideration?

She doesn't like sarongs. If I persisted in the attempt to buy her a sarong every other Christmas, there'd be ructions.

Why does she keep at it?

You're fatter and she's following the Trinny and Susannah rules?

Disappointed.

I thought this would be an update from OP on the neck status of this year’s jumper.

Sigh.

I find V-neck jumpers on men extremley attractive

I have no idea why but maybe your wife does too

Same

Ask your wife of 20 years.

This may be an unpopular view but I see Mumsnet as a community for women.
Can't men use one of the million other forums available?

My husband is “big and tall” and built like a rugby player.

He has a thick neck.

He looks dreadful in a round necked jumper because the line of the neck emphasises the roundness whereas a v neck is more slimming and stylish and he looks bloody gorgeous in them.

Op I suspect your wife is someone to whom aesthetics is important and she thinks she is doing the right and kind thing because you just look a lot, lot better in a v neck. She probably thinks (in the nicest possible way) that you are a bit of a knob for not being able to see yourself objectively in the mirror and how much better you look wearing one.

You could turn it around and say it’s almost an act of care on her part that she’s not going to buy you something you look awful in.

If she were to buy you a round neck it would be like you going out every year and spending good money on something that detracts from your wife’s figure.

You wouldn’t want to do that would you, or make her look bad?

Another example: my bil has an awful comb over aka Prince Charles in his early 30s. My sister has told him a thousand times to get it cut short but he won’t. He’s welded to his hair cut and probably will be for the rest of his life.

You see this inflexibility or lack of openness to new ideas all the time on makeover fashion shows and how people can’t see themselves objectively and are terrified of embracing change and get “stuck” in a certain style and have to be persuaded carefully to try something different to their set preferences. They usually don’t understand their own proportions properly or are wearing the wrong shaped clothing for their figure. And once that is sorted, they are usually transformed for the better!

Anyway, take it or leave it, my advice to you op is trust your wife! You presumably trust her about other far more important things in your life? Why not trust her over this?

And even if you don’t, it wouldn’t harm you to suck it up and wear the bloody things if you think it will make her happy? I don’t think your outrage and lack of flexibility over something as unimportant as a jumper, in the grand scheme of things, speaks very well of your character tbh. Never mind posting about it in a peevish way on sm. Most decent men I knows would laugh to themselves about it and wear it with gratitude for the fact that someone cares enough about them to buy them clothes. Be a man op and get over yourself and your pettiness!

Happy Christmas!

Oh bugger. Just seen this is a zombie thread!

Oh well … 😃

Maybe you look great in them but don't know you do