Woman in hospital bed opposite is driving me up the wall

[mullerfruitcorner]

I've been in hospital for best part of 9 weeks so I am probably being a bit unreasonable as I'm home sick, I miss my baby at home and I'm really poorly.

Woman opposite me came in last week to have her gallbladder removed. As soon as she came in she was demanding everything from the nurses. We all know we have a buzzer and we have to wait our turn but I had just come out of a nasty 20 minute seizure and she was shouting over saying 'she's finished now you can come to me'
She wanted a cup of hot water.. it's been like that the whole time and the nurses and us in this bay are getting fed up.
She constantly picks her nose and eats it. All the time. I've shouted so many times (during meal times) that it's disgusting and we don't want to see it as all of us in here are vomiting already. She replies with 'sorry it's annoying'

She has on multiple times shoved her fingers down her throat and made herself 'sick' and also poured her orange juice into the bowl and told the nurse she was sick to get IV anti sickness. She constantly spends the whole time itching her arse crack, she pulls the blanket off her and has no issue with having her legs wide open and we can see what she has for breakfast.
She hasn't left her bed once apart from to go to the loo. She hasn't showered at all, the nurses keep pushing her to shower but she doesn't want to. They've even offered a bedside wash and that was a no.

(She is fully mobile) I said to her yesterday 'shall we go for a little walk and brush our teeth?' She said she forgot to bring a toothbrush with her. They have spare here. She's been in for 6 days. She keeps complaining of chest pains and each time she has to have an ECG then a doc to review.
The infuriating thing is she only decides to get chest pain when I'm having a seizure. She only pretends vomits when somebody else is being sick.

I can't draw my curtain round and not see her as I need to be in eyesight of the doctors and nurses if I have seizures. (Up to 6 a day).

Everyone in the bay is getting tired of this. The nurses can see what she's doing. They told her she's medically fit to go home days ago but she won't leave as she has a new ailment.
There's probably nothing I can do. But I'm so close to losing my rag at her picking her beak and scratching her arse when we are all trying to get better. Trying to eat. We all have to touch the same finger monitor when they do our obs and I don't want to touch her germs, bogeys or arse crack particles. Small bay of 4 people.

What the hell can I do. It's making me so wound up but I can't do a thing about it.

Well if it’s a mental health issue she should be assessed from the psychiatric liaison team.
This is stressful - what about the whole bay complaining about her. She obviously wants to remain in hospital given the games she is playing.
Minimal - ask for the curtains to be pulled part way around her bed.or yours - she needs a side room.

I think you can reasonably ask to be moved room, citing that she is making you stressed and you are likely to be in hospital longer term. You can emphasise that she might be better suited to sharing with healthier, short term residents, particularly as it appears that witnessing people having seizures or being sick appears to make her ill.

I was once in a hospital bay with a women who kept telling me "oh it's so sad seeing someone as young as you in here, here whole life ruined..." and other lovely things. I was moved for my own wellbeing when they saw what was going on.

Hahahahahaha this is genius.
Excellent planning!

I'm in Basingstoke hospital - the hospital itself is amazing. All my cancer treatment is here too which is one of the reasons I transferred here after being at another hospital.

Hoping bogey woman will just go home. She says to the doctors on ward rounds 'I'm not ready to go home yet last night I had a nose bleed / chest pain / vomiting. And I just want to scream SHE DIDNTTT.

I think she's got munchausens.
The docs and nurses are aware - I guess she will just have to be evicted soon against her own will.

Oh OP you poor thing! When I was last in hospital I was in for 7 days and similarly the woman opposite me didn't wash the whole time - by the end of the week I could smell her from my bed, it was vile, and like you've said that kind of thing is so counterintuitive to healing. I don't doubt there are MH issues at play but that doesn't make it any easier for you at all. I don't have any constructive advice (other than to perhaps make a fuss on your own MH grounds and get yourself moved), but wanted to wish you better very soon 💐

She's 31. (Only because she shouts her DOB and full name when doing meds / obs.)

She was medically fit to go on Tuesday.
Overheard nurses saying she will be discharged in the next 48 hours.

Watch for another ailment to come up in the meantime!

I think your best bet is curtains around you at all times. Staff don’t like that as they need to observe you but just keep closing/asking to close and explaining why. I suspect they will move you.
She sounds mentally unwell but if it’s impacting you you need to do what is best for you.

Can they not move her to a single room where she won't annoy anyone?

I'd like to think they could. I think the problem is no side rooms available. I asked if I could pay the £50 a night for a standard room but none free. Only for a few days or id be broke after being in so long!

I'm going to talk to the nurses before lunch.

@mullerfruitcorner Other patients can be a blessing or a curse, depending.
This one sounds awful.
Poor nurses , having to deal with her.
Hope you get discharged soon.

Sadly, so many antisocial people about- Dad actually told a young man in next bed to “
Oh DO shut UP!” When man was raging at the nurses all night long for
( Methadone?)
The noise maker discharged himself next day .
(Orthopaedics)

The joys of a private room..can you not adjust your curtains so it just blocks off the view at end of bed?

I genuinely don’t think she has Munchhausens. I think she’s probably homeless and has something like ptsd, a personality disorder, or untreated schizophrenia and is also potentially also detoxing. She is attention-seeking because she has nowhere else to go. And no one to turn to. She is “faking” ailments because she doesn’t have another bed to go to.

Bugger.
Basingstoke is a bit far from me - I could do Countess of Chester, Arrowe Park, anything in Liverpool, Northwich Victoria which I thought was a football team Leighton, Wrexham Maelor and the big fucker at Stoke.
Hopefully she'll be kicked out today or can you ask to be moved to a diagonally opposite bay next time there's a vacancy
I'm glad I made you
If she's still there later, throw your lunch at her.

I also think it's okay to tell tales to the doctor that things didn't happen - it's for everyone's benefit.

I was also once in a ward with a diabetic women who kept getting "mysteriously" ill. I told the staff on her for eating whole boxes of quality street and putting the wrappers in my bin - it helped everyone to have the right information.

Sorry to go against the grain, but op you actually sound pretty awful yourself. It's really not ok to yell at other patients in the hospital and I'm not sure what you think gives you the right to do that? It'll be disturbing everyone else in your bay and is really very rude to the woman in question.

Also no idea what you mean by "we can see what she has for breakfast"?! Is this some weird colloquialism for being able to see her vulva?! Genuinely don't get what you're on about

It seems likely this woman has mental health issues/learning disabilities or... Maybe you just don't know her medical history/reason for being in hospital. You seem very sure that there's nothing wrong with her but you don't have access to her medical records and it's not like the nurses would tell you why she's in hospital (she's not in for 6 days for gallbladder removal that's for sure!)

I understand that you seem to be very unwell but this woman could also be very unwell. If you can't afford private treatment then you need to stick it out with the nhs where they will prioritise based on clinical need, not based on the fact you feel more entitled to care

Obviously the majority of posters agree with you so maybe I'm misreading this or something but you haven't come across well in my personal opinion. I'd be disgusted at you yelling at a fellow patient if I were in a bay with you

Thirty one?!
I was assuming someone with Dementia at 80 or 90

She definitely has issues- No person functioning on all four cylinders would do that antisocial stuff.

Your post made me feel ill, too.
A nose picking, arse scratcing person who makes themselves vomit- She sounds a real catch.

She sounds mentally unwell to me. She probably feels safe and looked after in hospital compared to her home life. Imagine how crap your life must be at home to feel that way. I know she's annoying but have a little sympathy she will be gone soon.

@transverseworries I agree, hospitals are for all - it is starting to feel like there's more to this than meets the eye.

OP - how come you are in a normal ward if your seizures are lasting twenty minutes?

And, being medically fit does not always mean discharge is appropriate.

I do think you need to stop sharing such detailed information about other patients on the internet too - you never know who may recognise her.

Don’t the staff insist on washing?
Or doing bed baths if a patient cannot move?

It can’t be good for morale to be smelly.

Given you are a long stay patient and it's extremely disturbing, and you've tolerated it for quite a long time now, I actually think you have a case for complaining to PALS about your situation. I think things might move quite fast once you do something like that.

The general female public doesn't expose themselves, fake heart pain, force themselves to vomit for attention and refuse to wash. Those are literally all signs of mental illness.

This does however seem to describe the average patient. Actually the average patient on a good day.

I would also stress again - please look into trauma-related non epileptic seizures - I've just read your other posts as well.

She sounds like she has mental health issues. Not excusing her behaviour, just saying this might be why she is like she is.

I think the OP needs Hattie Jacques to go around and sort out the hygiene and flashing situation.

She probably needs close observations, sad the hospital can't get it in place. I used to regularly do close observations in hospital for patients like this. It helps as I can advocate for them prompt to do personal care give them their medications . Defuse situations .Obviously it costs money so not everyone has it.

If you have mental capacity you can refuse to wash, the staff can try to prompt but you cannot force someone thats the law.