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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think my neighbour is being ridiculous?

186 replies

BlondeWaves · 12/11/2022 22:52

NC as a bit outing as can't imagine many people have had this discussion tonight. Hoping my neighbours aren't on here! I live in an end terrace. Get on really well with neighbours on the street. Neighbours who lived next door were lovely, used to pop in for coffee, would regularly have a glass of wine on am evening in the shared garden. They moved out recently and new neighbours moved in around two years ago.

I am a lone parent to a 4yo so my evenings are important to me. My son goes to bed at about 8:30 and wakes up at 7 every morning. By the time I've eaten, sorted stuff for nursery, made his packed lunch, cleaned etc it is 9:30/9:45 and I like to have a bath. Empty the bath water at around 10:30 then crawl into bed. This is probably 3x a week.

My neighbour came round today and asked on behalf of his wife that I don't have a bath so late at night as she can hear the water draining outside at 10:30. I was gobsmacked. I said pretty calmly that unfortunately I can't change the time I have a bath, as that's the time that suits me, at which point he asked if I could 'maybe leave the bath water in the tub until the morning and empty it then' (which obviously I can't do because my bathroom would go mouldy). I told him I had a phonecall (not a lie) and had to go but I'd speak to him later. AIBU to think that I should be able to have a bath whenever I want and that this is just part of living in a terraced house? For example I don't complain when their dog barks at 11pm or I can hear their TV at 2 in the morning, because some noise is expected.

I know, this all sounds a bit ridiculous but I actually feel awkward having a bath in the evening now. Never in my life had to worry about when I wash!

OP posts:
TooManyPlatesInMotion · 13/11/2022 15:09

Your neighbours sound batshit crazy!! Of course yanbu. And do not leave the bsth full until morning, it isn't safe for your child.

Flyinggeesei234 · 13/11/2022 15:15

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 13/11/2022 09:06

If you were a man or had a male partner, i would bet he would not have come round. People like them seem to pick on lone women to attack. Infuriating.

Keep us posted, OP. 💐

@ZeldaWillTellYourFortune 100% nailed it.

InFiveMins · 13/11/2022 15:36

YANBU, ignore them completely and carry on as you were.

TabithaTittlemouse · 13/11/2022 15:49

Suggest that they look after your child so that you can bathe earlier 😉

Mumsy2022 · 13/11/2022 17:40

This is such controlling behaviour!! 😳 It really does make you wonder where some people get off! The cheek of it. Don’t pander to his demands, enjoy your bath time. Us mums hardly get two minutes to so much. Self care is very important to be at your best for your child.

They’re being so selfish and rude. Keep enjoying your baths. If his wife don’t like it, maybe she pop some ear plugs in!

Ignore them, and if they continue to bother you, tell them it’s none of their business and to stop harassing you.

Tiani4 · 13/11/2022 18:42

InFiveMins · 13/11/2022 15:36

YANBU, ignore them completely and carry on as you were.

Very sensible advice

KatieCelf · 14/11/2022 02:13

You are definitely not unreasonable! Neighbours are being absolutely bonkers!!!

Staffymummy · 14/11/2022 03:06

Gosh thought I was reading my own post! I moved into my new home nearly two years ago, didn’t take me long to get chatting to the woman on the left who was the gossip of the street, then asked me who was it that had a bath about 10pm each night as it’s right beside her room, however this was after she had bitched about how she had said to her friend that she found it strange that we were moving in at such a late time, I said well some of us work shifts so have to do these things in between these shifts!
Since then I listen to her get drunk and talk loudly on her phone, sing at 2am,shout at the ex on the phone,so I record her on my mobile so if she moans again about my bath I will happily let her know about her failed audition for the X factor!

BasiliskStare · 14/11/2022 03:10

I had a friend who lived in Switzerland - apparently not allowed to flush loo after 10pm because of noise . If you don't live in Switzerland @BlondeWaves I would imagine most normal people can cope with hearing a neighbour's bath draining late evening. 😊

EYP2021 · 14/11/2022 07:35

@Pasc611 looks like the neighbour just entered the chat 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

User19886 · 22/11/2022 16:35

Just saw this in the Mirror: www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/my-neighbour-asked-stop-bathing-28477533.amp

@BlondeWaves

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