H said he can't see a problem with what David Walliams said

[Dinosaurs23]

Just talking to DH about our days and I said

"Did you see the thing about David Walliams"

He hadn't. I explained. That Walliams said about a BGT contestant

"She’s like the slightly boring girl you meet in the pub that thinks you want to fuck them, but you don’t. It’s the last thing on your mind, but she’s like: ‘Yep, I bet you do!’ ‘No I don’t!’ I had a bit of a boner, but now it’s going, it’s now shrivelled up inside my body.”

DH then said

"and? was the girl really young or something?"

I said - its total misogyny. He rolled his eyes. And said "it's unpleasant at most"

I haven't slept properly in ages (young DC) and me and DH have been winding each other up and I've been thinking about separation for months, but mainly deciding it is worth it to keep trying & not make everyones' lives much worse, there is no abuse, we can have a laugh, we are affectionate.

But this feels like a final straw. Like I just think it's gross.

Am I overreacting. I can't tell at the moment because lack of sleep and work pressure means I feel like crying/getting angry pretty easily.

But I mean...that's not a good reflection on his values is it?

AIBU: it's no big deal at all, just a difference in opinion
AINBU: your DH sounds like a sexist pig and its probably a terrible role model for your sons. LEAVE NOW.

I was struggling with whether to leave my exh and we were discussing family annihilator Chris Watts when he said something along the lines of “who could kill their children? I mean, the wife, I get it”. You GET it??

YABU

not sure how it’s misogyny either. Although many on here struggle with the correct use of that term.

Ive said before when women and men present like this, it’s a vibe you get, that someone just thinks everyone wants them but it can’t be further from the truth.

I don’t know OP but it sounds like the sort of thing my ‘D’H would say to be contrary and send me on the wind up, even if he agreed with me, especially if we’d been having problems.

couldn't get worked up over his comments really. he's a bit of a creep in general but if I described him as "a bit like the creepy guy in the pub who thinks u want to sleep with him but u dont. he makes me dry up" I don't think anyone would question it ..

It wouldn't bother me as I've learnt that most men are misogynistic and I've learnt to lower my expectations.

surprised you're getting so many YABU votes OP, it is sheer misogyny and to not recognise it is strange and suggests a strong difference in values between you and your other half.

What is he like the rest of the time?

Regardless of the comments on DW, the fact that you've got young kids and are sleep deprived means you probably shouldn't take big decisions now.

That puts a strain on the best of marriages.

Well it’s very common for the people to be killed by their spouses, so yes, the wife or husband most people can understand why that might happen, kids though definitely not

Don’t shag your husband tonight or anytime soon please.

I suspect more will come out about Walliams soon, so just sit back and see how he acts when it does.
If he doubles down, you know he’s a dick.

Well it wasn’t particularly nice but I was expecting a much worse comment. Who was the comment in reference too? Also what else has DW said to be seen as a creep?

I don't really see it as misogynistic.

Reverse it, "slightly boring guy in the pub who thinks you want to fuck him but you don't"......it's a fair fair enough comment either way, isn't it?

If things aren't great with your husband and he's giving you the ick fair enough, but in isolation this isn't something that would bother me. But if it bothers you it bothers you.

I was on the verge of hating exDH. I was pregnant, hated the way he smelled and how useless he was became more apparent.

Watching a television program where two teenage girls kissed. He then said, “Go on, have a finger fumble.”

Yeah, no.

Although leaving him happened a while after that moment I considered that to be The End.

Ive said before when women and men present like this, it’s a vibe you get, that someone just thinks everyone wants them but it can’t be further from the truth.

But Walliams didn't encounter her in a situation where she could remotely have been mistaken for being 'on the pull'. If he'd said it about a woman who'd been flirting with him in a pub, it would be unpleasant but ultimately not unfair - he's entitled to express an opinion about a social situation in private to a friend - but he's expressed this about a woman he's met in what is, for him, a professional context, which displays an astounding level of arrogance and entitlement.

I expect all slebs are like this :(

Is it really misogyny? I feel like a lot have people have met people where their looks are their personality and are overly sexual? I don't think pointing it out is misogyny as a PP said if it was reversed nobody would bring it up.

Yuck, that is really off-putting

It doesn’t really matter, people give off signals whether it’s in the pub or not, I’ve thought it about a woman who came in to do some executive training at work earlier in the year in fact.

Its not misogyny, can be said for men too.

I really can’t get worked up by DWs comments in this instance, even calling the other man a cunt, who hasn’t had someone piss them off and talk to a friend or co-worker and vented about it

@AnApparitionQuipped All true, but that's on Walliams.

As the OP's husband wasn't aware of the background (neither was I) he was just reacting to the stand-alone comment. Which I don't see as misogynistic.

Thinking it is one thing; no one would care if Walliams had thought it because we wouldn't know. Blabbing your unpleasant thoughts to a colleague at work in the earshot of others is different matter.

As a woman, no, wouldn't bother me, it's probably what some men think at times when they're single anyway.

Whoever's husband said the thing about Chris watts, I would be quite worried.....

For those minimising DW's comments and questioning OP's reaction to it and to her DH, I think they should be seen in the context of the rest of DW's behaviour. These threads on Mumsnet make interesting reading and contain links to news reports about DW:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4674012-david-walliams

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4462013-david-walliams-creepy-behaviour-pretending-to-expose-his-penis-at-work-on-stage-and-more

The OP said she told her DH Walliams said it about a BGT contestant.

It’s the sort of thing blokes say. Not worth getting worked up about,

I don’t think yabu. It bothers you that your dh is siding with a jerk and your dh is not being a gentleman, that’s what it comes down to and I don’t blame you.