H said he can't see a problem with what David Walliams said

[Dinosaurs23]

Just talking to DH about our days and I said

"Did you see the thing about David Walliams"

He hadn't. I explained. That Walliams said about a BGT contestant

"She’s like the slightly boring girl you meet in the pub that thinks you want to fuck them, but you don’t. It’s the last thing on your mind, but she’s like: ‘Yep, I bet you do!’ ‘No I don’t!’ I had a bit of a boner, but now it’s going, it’s now shrivelled up inside my body.”

DH then said

"and? was the girl really young or something?"

I said - its total misogyny. He rolled his eyes. And said "it's unpleasant at most"

I haven't slept properly in ages (young DC) and me and DH have been winding each other up and I've been thinking about separation for months, but mainly deciding it is worth it to keep trying & not make everyones' lives much worse, there is no abuse, we can have a laugh, we are affectionate.

But this feels like a final straw. Like I just think it's gross.

Am I overreacting. I can't tell at the moment because lack of sleep and work pressure means I feel like crying/getting angry pretty easily.

But I mean...that's not a good reflection on his values is it?

AIBU: it's no big deal at all, just a difference in opinion
AINBU: your DH sounds like a sexist pig and its probably a terrible role model for your sons. LEAVE NOW.

Do you consider it verbal flashing when women on here describe something or someone that makes their vaginas dry up like the Sahara

Well put.
It's the attitude of it: that whether or not a woman gives men a boner is the measure of them. Look, she did.... but oh no.... poor woman, now she's blown it. The power is all on one side.
OP, does your husband definitely know what misogyny means? David Walliams 100% hates and despises women.

That's bullshit. The top suspects in 90% of homicides are men. Men kill men. And men kill women.

@DrWhitWho 12 men are killed a year by their partners or ex partners on the entire country and at least a couple or those will be same sex relationships.

Walliams was at work, not on a chat forum. I say all sorts here that wouldn't be appropriate for the workplace. I wouldn't consider your example comment appropriate for the workplace, either.

@napody my concern is I sometimes think so does my husband

Despise women I mean.

I actually find these opinions annoying and imo they discredit any actual sexism or misogyny.

For the millionth time, it is not misogyny to say something negative about any women!

Women are not some higher beings that can’t be annoying as fuck or boring sometimes. It’s not saying they are annoying or boring BECAUSE they are women, that would be misogyny, it’s just a specific person.

Such women will exist somewhere I'm sure. It takes all sorts to make a world.

Also, it's a joke. The bloke denies it but he has got a hard on, but then loses it because of her boasting that she knows he wants to shag her.

Who would want to fuck Walliams? Seriously, who? He's repulsive.

But is it illustrative of a 'bigger problem'? I can argue with my DH about politics, about pop culture - it doesn't mean we have different deep seated values about family, about women's rights.
It's easy to get distracted by nonsense. If the comment made you realise your DH is constantly sexist, abuses his position at work and treats you like a second class citizen at home - then yy those are reasons to think you need serious conversations about your relationship.
But, 'we disagree on DW' - that's not a reason. Not least because sometimes people don't want to waste time talking about media storms when there are RL problems to address.

I vote you LTB right now

@Dinosaurs23 I'd agree with your husband that it was "unpleasant at most". And I think DW is a revolting toad.

I absolutely couldn't get worked up about this - but I don't have two small children so am now very much in 'don't really care' terrain, and am not seriously underslept.

FWIW, OP, I would advise you not to make any big decisions in the situation you're in at the moment. Watch and wait.

Can you not see the importance of the context here? Walliams made this remark in the workplace, not down the pub with his mates.

You're overreacting massively.

The comment itself isn't nice, but I've said worse about some blokes in private.

What's misogynistic is that he felt it was perfectly acceptable to say it about a specific woman, in public, when he is in a position of power as a judge on a popular entertainment show.

People are allowed options that you have the opposite of.
Not worth the drama.

It's not misogynistic, but distasteful. And certainly someone in his position saying that about a competitor in a public competition is out of order.

If married, the wife will be suspect number 1 until removed from the list.

Im sorry facts aren’t your thing

@luxxlisbon To talk about whether you would fuck a woman and whether she gives you a boner in the context of her auditioning for you shows a serious disrespect for women. Hence misogyny.

And?

I was merely replying to someone who got upset with their husband on the Chris watts case.

Its not weird to say you’d understand killing a spouse but not your kids. Most can understand the mindset behind killing another adult, not kids

@DrWhitWho I gave you a fact. 12 men are killed by partners every year, inclusive of same sex relationships. That it not common.

@AnApparitionQuipped Can you not see the importance of the context here? Walliams made this remark in the workplace, not down the pub with his mates.

The context or location doesn’t make it misogynistic though, inappropriate for the workplace yes but not misogyny which was the point this thread was making.

Context really doesn’t make much of a difference here.

I had a male visitor at work who thought he was the big I am, many women in the office commented similar comments as DW after he swaggered out (after regaling many with boring tales of his sailing boat…what a catch!) but not about their penises.

The back bending people on here are doing to make this into something it’s not is laughable

Misogyny isn’t disrespect for women

Why do so many on here really not understand the basic definition of words they try to use.

Misogyny is deep seated hatred of women, not disrespect, or being mean about. HATRED

Never said it was common for men to be killed by their spouses.

In fact I said the opposite, that it was less common than women killed by their spouses.

But when married men die, their wives are usually top suspects unless it’s clear otherwise.

I feel for your DH tbh, over reacting about this, not able to read or comprehend basic comments on here and basic lack of awareness of the definitions of words you use, hardly a catch