H said he can't see a problem with what David Walliams said

[Dinosaurs23]

Just talking to DH about our days and I said

"Did you see the thing about David Walliams"

He hadn't. I explained. That Walliams said about a BGT contestant

"She’s like the slightly boring girl you meet in the pub that thinks you want to fuck them, but you don’t. It’s the last thing on your mind, but she’s like: ‘Yep, I bet you do!’ ‘No I don’t!’ I had a bit of a boner, but now it’s going, it’s now shrivelled up inside my body.”

DH then said

"and? was the girl really young or something?"

I said - its total misogyny. He rolled his eyes. And said "it's unpleasant at most"

I haven't slept properly in ages (young DC) and me and DH have been winding each other up and I've been thinking about separation for months, but mainly deciding it is worth it to keep trying & not make everyones' lives much worse, there is no abuse, we can have a laugh, we are affectionate.

But this feels like a final straw. Like I just think it's gross.

Am I overreacting. I can't tell at the moment because lack of sleep and work pressure means I feel like crying/getting angry pretty easily.

But I mean...that's not a good reflection on his values is it?

AIBU: it's no big deal at all, just a difference in opinion
AINBU: your DH sounds like a sexist pig and its probably a terrible role model for your sons. LEAVE NOW.

I've just read the first page of replies and, only as I reached the end, cottoned on to the realization that you are all talking about David Walliams off of Little Britain and not David Mitchell, who I think is fab!

Phew!

I think it's interesting what Piers Morgan has said as well... reminds me of those who commented on Jimmy Saville years before it came out... I imagine there's plenty more about Walliams to come.

Dictionary definition "hatred, contempt or prejudice towards women" @DrWhitWho

That’s not misogyny!

If I met a potential client in work and said to a friend ‘they look good but it’s a pity they are dumb as fuck’ it wouldn’t be misogyny it sexism regardless of which sex is discussed.

In my younger days I would say that about a man, so can’t say it would bother me at all.

I think you are overreacting to consider this as a trigger to end your relationship.

I don't really see it as misogynistic. I don't think he's saying that female contestant gave him a boner but now she doesn't. He seems to be using a hypothetical situation to describe a feeling he has towards the contestant - which I take to be 'she thinks she's better than she is and it's off putting'. Definitely unpleasant, but I don't think it's misogynistic.

I must also say though that I don't follow any DW related news so can't put that comment into any context of his usual behaviour.

You said earlier on that you wonder if your DH despises women, if that's the case, it's obvious cause for concern.

I think DW seems to be quite an unpleasant character. It doesn't surprise me that he would talk about women in this way.

@DrWhitWho comment 19.09

"It's very common for men to be killed by their spouses"

I pointed out it is 12 a year.

You don't need to feel sorry for DH. He has two gorgeous children. He was able to leave his job because I earn 5 x his salary and can pay for everything. We have a cleaner.

The better I've done for myself, the more embittered towards women he has become.

So not disrespect then

Glad you’ve finally looked it up though

I’d not pay too much attention to what that creature thinks about anyone tbh

Is DrWhitWoo David Walliams

I wish, more so for the financial aspect of being a celeb!

@DrWhitWho again, definition of "contempt" = "showing lack of respect".

I know you think you're being clever, but you really aren't.

I totally see the difference in opinion about whether this counts as misogyny as clearly there is a fair amount of subjectivity - but please stop with the semantics bullshit.

Well yes, that's a pretty bloody massive concern.
I think you should trust your instincts on that one.

I always wonder about people on here that trot out the old 'well what if the sexes were reversed' stuff. I mean.... are you being wilfully obtuse or do you really not understand why that doesn't work as an argument?

You're wrong. Stastica and ONS prove you are wrong. Men are the primary suspects in murders of men.
No amount of nonsense posts you make on this thread will change that fact.
You may want to reflect on why you're so invested in trying to fudge the figures related to male violence.

I’m not trying to fudge anything

And ONS data doesn’t show anything related to suspects when married males are murmured. Especially at home.

Men might kill more men than women, but if my husband was killed at home, like in the Chris Watts case, I’d be the top suspect.

Christ some on here have such little brain power

I can't see how this is misogyny from any angle. It is true that some women think a man who even blinks in their direction is waiting for an opportunity to ask her for marriage. But I can see that given that a lot of men would gladly sleep with any willing participant how it can otherwise be perceived.

David Walliams was in a professional role

This. Not only was he being unprofessional about the contestant, but it's not what other ''talent' and crew want to be having to listen to in their workplace (and presumably not challenge because DW is in a position of power and 'the star').

Why do you even want to talk about this? Talk about something you agree on instead. Williams is not worth falling out over.

When I told my now exH that the next door husband was screaming at his wife to the sound of smashing glass and he said 'good man'.

@Lil50 "Talk about something you agree on instead".

First problem is you don't know what you are going to agree on until you start talking

Second problem is that would a very odd/dull way to conduct a relationship.

The love has gone and you are now seeing the horrible traits your husband displays, whereas before, you might have been less willing or able to see them. Basically you've got the ick. It's hard to come back from that. And in your case it's one more thing, on top of a list that you already had.

Ironic that DW would say that about someone else - that's the vibe I get about him. And if Piers Morgan thinks he's awful, with all the knowledge he must be privy to, I'm inclined to think there must be something in it.

Bad enough to say this about a woman you don't know, to mates in the pub, but in the context of a work situation, it's really grim!

The better I've done for myself, the more embittered towards women he has become.

Then this is the problem. Focus on this, not Walliams. I'm not saying this problem is or isn't insurmountable, but focus on this. If you had no issues in your relationship, I don't think you'd be allowing Walliams to cause one.

Sad how so many women don't even recognise the misogyny in this. They have become so accustomed to derogatory remarks from men they think it's normal...

He doesn't know her at all but assumes that she'll think that men will want to fuck her, and assuming that no man will go near her because of her looks.

Again, why do some of you think this is acceptable? He is in a privileged position of power and is completely disrespectful to someone for no reason other than that he CAN make remarks like that without anyone setting him straight, he just got unlucky it had been recorded.

Am I overreacting? Yes