One of my direct reports is on onlyfans

[andreee]

I am so conflicted about what to do about this but one of the people I manage (a girl in her early 20s) does onlyfans and has a public p0rn Twitter account. Another colleague told me that they found her TikTok through her phone number, and the TikTok links to the Twitter page with the explicit videos, and that links to the onlyfans. The Twitter isn’t even under a pseudonym, it’s her nickname that she uses at work!

The issue isn’t that she has onlyfans as much as the fact that she is using her real life nickname and there are videos of her on a public Twitter account using various toys on herself with her face clearly visible! She has also posted a photo of her hand where she is clearly at her work desk at our office, asking her ‘fans’ to pay for her nails.

AIBU to even think about taking this higher up? My gut instinct was to say nothing and not get involved but if she is this blasé about it then a client might find out. We work in a field where public image matters and staff photos are on the website.

You have to seek advice from HR. It was brought to you as a work issue not as idle gossip. Any place I've worked her actions would have contravened three of our contract clauses. HR may want to discuss with the PR team too depending on what sector you're in.

Personally I’d approach the colleague and explain what you’ve been told and give her the opportunity to make it right- ie by using a separate phone number for her OF so her contacts don’t get shown to her other sm accounts linking to her OF, making sure any head shots are behind a paywall and remind her that taking photos for or posting on her OF at work is obviously unacceptable and could bring the company into disrepute if the background was identified as your workplace.

i would then gauge her reaction to the conversation- if she’s horrified and hasn’t realised (it’s not that obvious) that TikTok links her contacts including work colleagues to her OF then I’d being giving her the benefit of the doubt to rectify the situation, if she’s blasé about it I would be telling her that you have to take it to HR and let them deal with it.

obviously the nature of your work is relevant here too- anything working with kids or young people etc would make this extremely inappropriate, working in marketing-less so 🤷🏻‍♀️

i thinking running straight to HR about it is abit vindictive tbh, without having a word first to see if she even realises.

Also OP if you don't discuss this with HR and it later comes to light in a negative or more high profile way (eg a client sees it and complains; or local media picks it up as a story) then as the most senior staff member made aware of it, you'll be responsible for not managing it properly.

Mind your own business.

This would be gross misconduct where I work

Same, and I’m in the private sector.

The vast majority of organisations wouldn’t want their brand image associated with sex work.

Honest to god, this is what HR is for.

It’s not your responsibility to make a judgement call here. HR will look at the facts and investigate and make a decision based on the organisation’s policies.

You don’t have much choice really- another colleague has flagged it with you, it won’t be long in getting out.

If nothing else, HR can have that awkward conversation about anonymity and safety online, which sounds like it’s well overdue.

Something similar happened to a good friend of mine- the pictures went through her social circle and out to people that were barely even acquaintances shockingly quickly. A lot of nasty judgement and people talking behind her back.

It sounds like you're the one who needs to "grow up". This isn't the playground, this is adult life. If a member of staff reports concerns to you, you don't just sit on the information because if it all blows up in a year's time HR will have no hesitation in sending you down too, in order to protect the company.

If sex work is work then you need permission from your main employer just like with any second job in order to avoid any conflict of interest. Naturally you would also need to declare earnings to HMRC.

Presumably TikTok went through the colleague's phone book (many social media apps ask to do this), said "here's someone you may know", the colleague clicked on it and out of curiosity followed the links (it was clearly set up in order to promote it).

The woman in question needs to consider the risks of being recognised, and at least take precautions that include obfuscating her real identity and avoiding social media use on work time. At 20 years old we were all pretty foolish when considering internet safety, for some the result has been frightening:
www.dexerto.com/entertainment/tana-mongeau-reveals-terrifying-onlyfans-stalker-visited-her-house-with-knives-1864412/
www.irishtimes.com/news/crime-and-law/men-arrested-over-attempt-to-blackmail-onlyfans-user-1.4506788
www.mirror.co.uk/news/us-news/creepy-stalker-lived-onlyfans-models-26392398
www.dexerto.com/entertainment/onlyfans-model-forced-to-move-after-stalker-sends-disturbing-backyard-knife-photo-1974862/
www.thesun.co.uk/news/uknews/16416951/woman-followed-ibiza-onlyfans-stalker/
7news.com.au/lifestyle/young-aussie-on-onlyfans-exposes-sugar-daddys-naked-blackmail-plot-c-6145737

Is it right that there are men out there who stalk and blackmail women? No. Does that mean that we should pretend that everything is sun and rainbows? Also no.

It's laid out pretty clearly in the OP, but I'll break it down for you. OP quotes in bold.

one of the people I manage (a girl in her early 20s) does onlyfans and has a public p0rn Twitter account.

Making her easily recognisable and findable online.

We work in a field where public image matters and staff photos are on the website.

Advertising OnlyFans in a way that links to your day job is often considered bringing the company you purportedly work for into ill repute.

there are videos of her on a public Twitter account using various toys on herself with her face clearly visible!

Making it clear it is the same person who works for X company, a place of straight work, not a hockshop.

She has also posted a photo of her hand where she is clearly at her work desk at our office, asking her ‘fans’ to pay for her nails.

Really pushing her luck here.

OP is this woman's manager - she is one of the people I manage - therefore it is her business and her responsibility to deal with this in some manner. People are sacked for far less.

It’s interesting to see how porn is taken differently on these threads and depending on who is doing it.

DdraigGoch HMRC don't get involved in taxing sex work as it would come under gaining from immoral earnings. I know as I worked in a department that did investigations in massage parlours & saunas, the only earnings that were able to be included were straight massage type earnings, any "extras" were disregarded.

Such an easy problem to pass on to someonelse- your boss or hr

Call me a prude if you will but I really don’t want it to become common place acceptable behaviour to masterbate at work while recording oneself for only fans (even if they are off the clock when it’s happening) that’s gross. Also what if the chair is company property? What if I grabbed it without knowing? Some people are gross and get turned on by not cleaning it off and watching others sit in their… shutters left over bodily fluids… gross! If anything it is at the very LEAST a workplace sanitation hazard!

I agree that HR is the only way to go.

If this is true, what does it matter? What industry are you in? What harm is being done?

the phrase direct report is gross

@Ugzbugz Eh?

It means a subordinate, i.e., a person who reports directly to OP. Why is that "gross"?

At this point I think this thread has just attracted a lot of trolls. Either a lot of trolls or a lot of people severely lacking in reading comprehension.

Honest to god, this is what HR is for.

It’s not your responsibility to make a judgement call here. HR will look at the facts and investigate and make a decision based on the organisation’s policies
Agree with this.
It's a risk doing anything else.

HR here, unless you're in an industry such as public services, teaching, etc., OR it's specifically stated in your contracts that it's prohibited then I'd leave it alone. Yes you could pull her in and give her the rap for using social media during working hours but honestly, can everyone on here say they've never had a quick scroll whilst at work? Workplaces do not own their employees lives and whoever reported her sounds extremely petty, it's none of their business (unless there are specific concerns as stated above).

If you're really in HR you really really need to do some brushing up.

No, it's not just those certain industries that it would affect.

I work for a bank. They're very hot on not bringing the company into disrepute by personal actions and not putting the business at risk of reputational damage...that's the only mention in our terms, no specifics.

I would absolutely lose my job for this. It's got Daily Mail headline written all over it, the risk of reputational damage for the business would be huge. My employer is by no means unique in these terms.

If I just happened to notice this myself, I'd play dumb and just pretend I didn't know. If someone brought it to my attention I'd report it as I wouldn't risk being pulled down on the womans sinking ship.

Completely depends on her contract of employent. She has a second job, is that allowed? If not then you have to report to HR, as she's got is a 2nd job. You cannot moralise / justify taking more or less action because it's onlyfans, rather than deliveroo.
However if she is allowed a 2nd job, you need to take her to one side and just say that she cannot use one jobs workplace nor time for the other job and say that if it happens again then she'll have to go through a PIP process. (Obviously if she starts to create then get HR involved immediately).
She needs to lear the boundaries of one job vs the other.

I have Tiktok as I installed it when my niece did a dance with my daughter. I never ever go on it yet every day I get notified that so and so from my phone contacts is on there and posted a video. Could me a former colleague or my kids babysitter, it’s very random.

HR here... Yes you could pull her in and give her the rap for using social media during working hours but honestly, can everyone on here say they've never had a quick scroll whilst at work?

Did you read the OP?! A quick scroll while at work is hardly the issue.

HR, you say? H.R. Pufnstuf, more likely.

I believe that earnings from onlyfans are taxed, I recently met a friend of a friend who is an accounant for onlyfans users

He didn't onviously divulge any of their information but he did say he did their tax returns

I’m surprised at the majority of comments on here being ‘beak out’ and ‘it’s up to her what she does outside of work’ when anytime onlyfans or porn is brought up in other threads on mumsnet, it’s considered terrible and exploitative. I watched a documentary about Onlyfans, it was really shocking - it’s not the harmless side hustle many seem to think it is.

Also not sure about the mental gymnastics of ‘she probably has to do Onlyfans because you pay her a shit wage’ 🤨

I know we’re all supposed to be sex work-positive nowadays but do people honestly think it’s 100% acceptable to have a public twitter account with videos of you using sex toys under the same name you for work, when you’re in a professional client-facing role and you have a headshot on the website? Really?