Women who don't want kids

[DeadPumpkins]

Is it just me.. or do women who don't want children constantly go on about how much they don't want children?

Nothing against it at all, each to their own and I'm sure I've read that single, childless women are the happiest people which makes sense 😂 but why do they always feel the need to talk about how much they don't want kids??

I've noticed the same. It's so boring. It's like me talking a out how I'm not going to have a holiday non stop or I'm not going to go for a walk. Not doing something isn't that interesting.

I've got a few acquaintances that constantly go on about how they are never having kids, bleugh kids are gross, I love sleep blah blah.

Mine are teens now and I rarely ever mention them so it isn't me bringing kids up. I'm over the baby phase and couldn't give a shite if you choose to have one or not.

I've found that the most vocal are single women, probably feeling defensive or something because they think everyone is judging them for not having a partner or kids.

Really I'm just over kid talk. If you have them, want them or don't want them good for you but I don't want to hear about it.

Yeah, it’s just you

@Cuppasoupmonster You don’t need to be a parent to know that sick children can’t be left to their own decides and parents aren’t looking after them because it’s fun.

I’m guessing that what your manager was saying was, “we can’t accommodate your 28th absence this week, why can’t your child’s father or indeed anyone else step in here?”

As for the rest of it - you’re not having kids for my benefit, so I’m not going to express gratitude anymore than I’d expect you to express it to me paying for your kids’ education, healthcare, CB etc. etc. etc.

It's an interesting one, for sure.

Men don't typically go on about how they don't want kids but then again no one asks men "when are you gonna have a baby"

There are childless women who never mention it too, don't get me wrong, I've just noticed that more and more women will make a point of saying how happy they are without kids and it seems odd that you'd try and convince someone of that instead of just... being happy...

How does the subject come up?

What time is it?
Four pm and I never want children!

Going away this weekend?
No and I never want children!

Surely it's something you'd talk about only if the conversation was already about children?

You’re only ever going to hear from the very vocal ones! Most of us just happily get on with our no-child lives, unless the point is pressed.

I don't talk about it unless pushed.

'When are you having children?'

'I used to feel that way too, until I grew up.'

'Ah, you'll change your mind.'

'People like you should have kids!'

'Who's going to look after you in your old age?'

'You just haven't met the right man yet.'

I find that many people are so desperate to validate their own life choices (this isn't limited to having children, could be anything) that they cannot comprehend that other people have made different life choices and are happy.

Some of my friends have children. They know I've never wanted children. I know they've always wanted children. We're friends because we respect each other's life choices and don't constantly try to force our opinions on each other.

I was incredibly happy for them when they got pregnant because I knew it was what they wanted. They are happy for me that I remain child-free because they know it's what I want.

It's really not difficult to accept different people have different wants and needs.

Its not all of them, but theres a definite group of militantly childfree who constantly go on about how much they hate kids and babies and breeders.
I think theyre trying to be edgy

'Maybe it's because they live in a society that is CONSTANTLY telling women that they are expected to want to get married and have children and that devoting their lives to looking after their children will give meaning to their empty lives, blah blah blah.'

Yes yes to this. I don't have kids and I almost never mention it, because I don't want to risk any judgemental or hurtful comments. The only time I 'go on about it' is if I am with other women who don't have kids, and even then it's a tiny fraction of what we talk about. I know way more mums who bang on endlessly about their kids, but also plenty who don't

'always love this absolute certainty that their child will be incredibly beneficial to future society and us.'

This gets on my bloody wick too! Please don't pretend that you had kids to benefit anyone except yourself

Men don't typically go on about how they don't want kids but then again no one asks men "when are you gonna have a baby

You've answered your own question there OP. Men aren't constantly expected to justify their failure to reproduce.

I except you're the type of person who goes on at them about why they don't have kids yet 🙄🙄🙄

With my acquaintances it usually comes up with them saying oh did you hear so and so is pregnant. Ew gross, why would they do that to themselves type thing. Or Anne came around with her children last week, I'm so glad I don't have any, couldn't wait for them to leave.

Just you I think.

@Branleuse Yes exactly! That's what I'm talking about 😂

i don’t want children, I get asked ALOT if we are thinking about it and have been told my DP must be the wrong person for me as if I did love him enough I’d want them with him.
I also have friends that make having a child literally their ONLY personality trait.

@MaryBeardsShoes Nope, try reading the whole thread first 😁

Suprising number of pregnant friends for a high school...

it's just you.

Or just possibly they find it tiring or dull or even painful for reasons they don't want to disclose?

I seriously doubt anyone talks about this because they want to be "edgy". They probably just don't want to have endless discussion about other people's children or their own reproductive plans foisted on them.

I once dated a man like this. At first, I was pleased that we both didn't want kids, then as time went on, I found his attitude wearing.

As I've said separately, it's not a positive trait to be so judgemental of other people's choices in life. He was positive of my choice to not have kids, but he was so judgey of other people's choice to have kids that his attitude on children actually became a massive turn-off.

I just want a nice man who doesn't want kids, but isn't bothered about other people's choice to have or not have them. Just our choice.

I've found the number of people who want to tell me every detail of their children's lives vastly outnumbered the women who talk about not wanting children...

Defintely… and I say that as a parent 😂

You're probs always whinging on about your kids and they're telling you they don't care.

I have never noticed that women who don't want children talk constantly about it

This.

They don’t. What’s happening is you feel personally affronted by their decision as it doesn’t align with yours, so you’re ‘seeing’ these women apparently everywhere.

I don't have kids, it wasn't a choice. I rarely talk about it. I have both friends with and without kids and I have never, ever met anyone who bangs on about not wanting kids.