To not date someone who can't spell/has poor grammar?

[denpark]

Ok, so Im back in the dating game after being married for a long time and, whilst it's fun, I'm not rushing into anything in particular or desperate to date.

There's a guy who I've met who seems really nice in person. He asked me for my number and we've been texting a bit with a view to going on a date soon.

Thing is - his spelling and grammar are atrocious and it's really annoying me. Im a teacher so it's one of those things that gets under my skin.

Do I overlook it and give it a chance or will it be a thing that constantly winds me up? He could be dyslexic but if it translates into him not speaking properly (e.g. 'could of/should of' or 'pacifically' then it's going to drive me mad...)

He's so nice...!

My old boss was a senior partner in the law firm I worked in. He couldn’t spell at all (used to write just the first and last letter in a word with a long scribble in the middle!).

He was hugely successful. I used to do all his spelling for him.

You haven’t even met him yet..

Just go on a date and see.

What makes you think you’re so bloody special in the dating pool that you can run someone down like this?

Read my other posts. It's if it translates into him not speaking properly that will annoy me, not potential dyslexia.

Actually this would annoy me (teacher too!) but not a deal breaker if intelligent and great in other ways.

At no point have I ever said that I think I am. We all have things that wind us up. Not speaking properly happens to be mine.

PS I definitely judged online dating messages on SPaG. I found poor written accuracy a huge turn off... I don't care if that's weird!

It's not the probable dyslexia that annoys me but the potential for poor speech. But he's so lovely (we've met through friends several times before, but always after a few glasses of wine).

I just think you're making teachers look a bit cunty and let's face it, they get enough flack on MN as it is.

Own the fact this is a problem for you and stop blaming your job.

Either date him or don't, no-one here can truly advise you.

What do you count as speaking proper? What about local dialects? Cockney vs West London for example?

I think you should let him go. You’re already making Everest out of an ant hill. Maybe skip written communication next time and go straight to a phone call.

Meh…I am a fully functioning grammar and spelling aficionado, They only thing that is my hill that I will die on is my double space after a “.” And my Oxford Comma.

I will pull out a could of when I’m being lazy or in a situation where I can’t be bothered. I am also the queen of run on sentences and use ellipses just because I can. It’s not a moral failing.

Op, the errors may be because of dyslexia, and in that scenario, you’d be wise to see for yourself if you “fit” on all the other levels you value
If however it’s lazy text talk, then you may think differently.
importantly, you won’t know until you meet up, if you want to have further meets or dates.
nothing ventured, nothing gained.
as you said yourself, you married someone who fits the spelling and grammar criteria, but failed miserably elsewhere.
let us all know how it went, and if all his other qualities knocked his English abilities into the back of nowhere.
good luck 🍀

This is weird. She’s not ‘running him down’. Something irritates her and she’s wondering if she wants to take things further. EVERYONE is special enough to have whatever dating dealbreakers they like.

Yes, how dare the OP have preferences? Stuck up cow.

Back ing he real world, I’m with the OP. Poor spelling and grammar give me the ick.

Your DH sounds lovely.
I married the twat who could spell...!

...so maybe this is a non-twat who can't spell. Which would you prefer?

And this doesn't make sense.

Are you saying you've been smashed off your tits every time you've met him so you have no idea how he actually speaks?

'Could of'
'Should of'
'Pacifically'

Those kinds of things make my skin crawl. I prefer well-spoken people who pronounce words correctly. Simple!

Haha just saw that autocorrect changed my post! Should have said ‘back in the real world’.

Oh the irony 🙄😂

Are you perfect Op?
Are you good at everything?
Pathetic question you've asked?

Yeah because there are only two options available. Twats who can spell or lively men who cannot.

It’s not a case of the OP having a preference though. It is being expressed as contempt for how someone writes and how someone could potentially speak before they even date, that is ridiculous.

LOVELY, not lively!

That's exactly what I'm thinking - dyslexia isn't something I would ever judge someone on, but if he's a seriously lazy speaker then it would just grate.

Hopefully that's not going to be the case. I've had too much wine on the times I've met him before (with friends) so I can't judge yet!

Ok the spelling and word errors in this thread is making me laugh 😂