I think smokers are just so selfish

[lawofselfish]

Not just because of the disgusting smell, but because of everything needing 10/15 mins advance notice.

'Yes I'm ready, just nipping out for a cigarette and then we can go' etc.

Really annoying.

My view of my father has been forever tainted with 'selfish' knowing that he couldn't afford car seats for us, or medical care for my mother, but there was always money for smokes. In other words, his smokes were more important than our lives. He hasn't smoked for a year now though. It was easy to give up when the doctors told him his life was at risk.

Not all smokers are selfish. I am a smoker and smoke outdoors at home and never in the house. I only smoke if I am out if noone else around and always discard of the butt in a bin or out of sight of anyone. I hate butts all over the pavement. I am not aware of ever holding anyone up whilst I smoke, no more than anyone needing the toilet, grabbing a bag or touching up their make up.

You cannot stereotype smokers based on the few you have met that you consider to be inconsiderate.

There was also the time that my father told my mother she'd have to spend less on groceries due to cost of living going up. She was already stretching every cent and suggested that maybe he could smoke less instead. He got pretty angry about that.

He didn't know before that he was coating his lungs with tar and nicotine?

Of course he did, he just didn't think it would affect him.

For me, attitude has a lot to do with it (to be fair, as with many things that some people do, others hate). Our lovely neighbour smokes on her balcony, which sometimes drifts over through our window. She's so apologetic and has many times said 'Please let me know if you want me to stop, check when the wind is blowing the other way' etc. I still hate the smell, but the worry over how she is perceived by her neighbours makes a huge difference.

Re-reading that, it sounds like I think she should be pathetically apologetic; I absolutely don't! I feel she's far too far the other direction from the oft-maligned 'fuck you, I'll do it anyway' attitudes that are often complained about. She's so lovely and I've tried to reassure her every time. I'm sure there are things we do in our every day lives that piss her off too, after all!

My bugbear though (and I know I'm in someone's house, so it's entirely their right) is doing visits in some smokers' homes, and then visiting another patient. I have had a complaint raised before, that I visited a palliative patient, stinking of smoke. I don't blame the family for complaining, at such an emotional time. But it was a very unpleasant situation all round. Hard to balance the rights of both parties.

I am happy to know that throwing cigarette butts on the floor isn't universal to all smokers. Like you I hate butts all over the pavement or all over the grass in a park and have wondered whether throwing them down wherever you happen to be was actually a completely acceptable thing, and I was being really fussy/anal for thinking it was horrible.

A friend of mine used to smoke and also smoked in the garden rather than indoors and I never knew her to smoke while walking down the street, nor to delay us leaving in order to have a cigarette, so I don't think OP you can say all smokers are the same.

I don't know why I'm surprised...

Smoking is a choice though. Not everyone has the funds to just up and move to a place without traffic.I don’t agree all smokers are selfish, but there are many that don’t care about the effects that their smoking has on other people. I have had to dig cigarette butts out of my garden because some smokers think the earth is their litter box and don’t care where they throw it away when there are bins nearby they could dispose them in. Some standing in public areas thinking their smoke just goes directly up in the air when it is more like a cloud and you have little choice to walk through it. The smell is so off-putting and it sticks to you regardless if you’ve been smoking or not. I’ve been put off my meal because some’s habit is so strong as well as the smell on their clothes because I couldn’t smell my meal without almost putting my face in it.

I get that it is the little joy that some people have but it is still a choice and effects the people around them.

This is what I was going to say. This applies to any addiction.

I have to admit, now that he's been forced to stop it's so much more enjoyable to be in his company. No breaking up restaurant meals by going for a smoke, no breaking up visits and conversations by going for a smoke. It's so much less disruptive. Bonus that he doesn't stink.

I agree, fortunately don't know many now a days . My MIL is one though. She has lost all her teeth due to the disgusting habit. If I give her a lift it stinks the car out. On long journeys we have to stop so she can have a fag then obviously stinks the car out. She has given up before for years but gained a small amount of weight, so went back to it .....I honestly can't understand the mentality 😔

OP the problem is selfish people in your life, not the fact that they're smokers.

I smoke, DH smokes, friends of ours smoke, none of us would ever expect any non-smoker to hang about waiting for us while we smoke, because that would be weird and selfish

@RichardMarxisinnocent Another smoker here who would not dream of dropping a butt on the ground, nor smoking walking down the high street, nor smoking indoors, nor when sitting beside people eating.

What annoys me the most is when you are walking behind a smoker or vaper and suddenly find a load of smoke that was in their mouth now in your face

I went to a rugby match some years ago (international, sell out so no question of changing seats) and the man sitting next to me was smoking. Ruined the experience. My chest hurt the next day from inhaling his smoke while cheering and shouting. Should have reported him to stewards but doubt they’d have done anything.

Aww smokers are so oppressed :(

@LesterBiggott you are literally looking for ways to be offended now.. no one has said anything about working class people

I feel you OP. I had my glucuse tolerance test the other week, after the awful drink you have to sit in the hospital waiting area for two hours --trying not to throw up. The girl who had an appointment after me, she had her drink, then went straight outside for a fag. Came back in and made the waiting room stink of cigarettes for two hours. Aside from the obvious horror of choosing to smoke through pregnancy, why would you then subject a roomful of nauseous pregnant women to secondhand smoke off your clothes?

Feel free to start threads about things you find annoying. This thread happens to be about selfish behaviour amongst smokers.

They are very selfish, make no mistakes. The only way to stop them puffing smoke into other people’s lungs is strict laws and penalties. Before anti-smoking laws were introduced they were smoking everywhere and generally being inconsiderate arseholes. Adults smoking around young children etc..
And just like someone mentioned above, they always have some secret money for ciggies, even if their children have to go hungry.

This ….cannot believe you felt the need to start this thread !

Why?
It's a perfectly normal thread?

There are some very defensive posts on here.

I wonder are some of them from the diminishing cohort of smokers who still refuse to hear the message.
The ones who light up in outdoor restaurants even when people around them are still eating; who squash into crowded bus shelters on wet days and light up; who walk through the park on sunny days blowing smoke all around them, and generally take the view that if they can legally smoke somewhere then consideration doesn't come into it.

I prefer it to vaping.
Vaping makes me gag. Those sick air freshener smells, yuck.
The smell of a cig at the next table is quite nice.
Smokers are addicted so I don't think selfish is the right word either.
Nin Smokers myself but never anti smoking.