I think smokers are just so selfish

[lawofselfish]

Not just because of the disgusting smell, but because of everything needing 10/15 mins advance notice.

'Yes I'm ready, just nipping out for a cigarette and then we can go' etc.

Really annoying.

Not sure why it's petty. It's a stinky habit that impacts on other people - as well as impacting on smokers' skin, respiratory health, circulation, dental health. I doubt most people actually want to smoke, it's just self-delusion, tiny fists of rage stuck in ears because people don't want to hear the truth!

Hang on , let me finish me fag and then il comment .....

Depends on person. Our family smoker is super contentious. Smokes at the end of Street away from everyone, wears a jacket they hang outside, washes their hands when they come in and use mouthwash and gum. Started when kids arrived and now they are all teens. Also won't smoke infront of kids as feels setting bad example. They are doing their best

You really don't need to be too close to smell a smoker!

everything needing 10/15 mins advance notice.

'Yes I'm ready, just nipping out for a cigarette and then we can go' etc.

Really annoying.

That is really annoying but none of the smokers I know do this. There are inconsiderate people in every section of society, even amongst non-smokers.

I don't mind the smell but can understand why people don't like it. Equally there are some perfumes that make me gag.

I'm having my last one before I go to bed, need to be refreshed for my night shift tonight.

Fair point about perfumes. I prefer those though, even when I find them obnoxious.

Not necessarily. If I'm not allowed to smoke, it doesn't worry me at all (because I'm such a rule-follower I think?). Also, if I'm the only smoker in a party, it doesn't even occur to me to light up.

A pp mentioned airports. I admit I will have a last cigarette before I go in as it could be 18 hours before I can have another, and I will light up as soon as I'm out the other side but I'm fine in the meantime.

I wish they'd take the decision out of my hands and ban the bloody things entirely.

Here we go again. People who drink alcohol, are NOT the same as smokers. Unless they are a chronic alcoholic, their drinking alcohol will not affect everyone else. With smokers, everyone else has to put up with the STINK and the second hand smoke!!!

As many posters have said, it makes them choke, it stings their eyes, it gets onto their lungs, and they struggle because they have respiratory issues. My DH's father smoked like a fucking chimney around him and his brother, and they both developed respiratory issues from their mid teens.

Many smokers ARE selfish and thoughtless, and they STINK. Their clothes, their home, their car, their breath, and everything they touch! As I said on another thread I cannot ever be friends with a smoker, because I can't go to their home. they can't come into my home, I can't sit in a coffee shop with them, and we can't go in the car together, because they stink! So I just point blank refuse to be around anyone who smokes.

Weirdly, my 2 DC (mid 20s,) have about 25 friends between them - ex school, ex-uni, ex colleagues etc - and not ONE of them smokes. Not one. Seems all of them cannot stand to be around smokers either.

As quite a few posters have said on this thread, and another anti smoker thread today, (by the way that's the only two that I've ever seen on mumsnet,) it's amazing how some people manage to find the money for smokes, but can't find the money for food and essentials for their kids. This isn't me saying this, there are posters on these threads saying that their father did it, or people they know NOW do it. Always have a little sneaky stash of money somewhere for the smokes, but no money for essentials for the family.

I can't believe that we still live in a society where people still have this absolutely foul, disgusting habit. Never mind 'oh, but it's so hard to give up,' people are still continuing to start it. Despite it being horribly expensive, and foul and smelly, and bad for your health, and everyone has known it's bad for your health for at LEAST 50 years! Yet people still start it, and they say 'oh but I just can't give it up!!!'

@LesterBiggott you seem bizarrely invested in defending smokers. Why is that? As someone said earlier in the thread. maybe people are hitting a raw nerve. I also agree with a pp that there is nothing 'petty' about bashing smokers. They deserve it frankly.

I can believe that it's harder to quit than crack or heroin. It's freely available, more socially acceptable (it may be far less fashionable than it was and much criticised, but socially you can light up in more places than you can shoot up) and isn't likely to destroy your ability to work or have relationships in the way hard illegal drugs are likely to do.

But there is a lot of help available for quitting. And if you're prioritising it over something like children's car seats, you need to take that help and keep on trying.

@MolliciousIntent How much do you know about addiction? Are you making the statement that selfishness is part of being an addict based on how you see them? Addiction is not a lifestyle choice, overcoming addiction is. Addiction is a disease and is more often than not hereditary.

I guess you didn't have to have a gestational diabetes test then? I was told to fast, no food and only sips of water, for 12 hours pre test. Then disgusting sugary drink, blood test and sitting for 2 hours. If you didn't find that nauseating then you must have an iron stomach! The last thing you need is a strong smell of fags while you're trying not to throw up 😩

In my experience, all the smokers I have ever known have been selfish and put their smoking above others.

My father smoked in the house when I was a child. It was awful and made me cough so much. When I asked him to do it outside I got a telling off about it being his house and he would do what he wanted.

Unsurprisingly my siblings and I all had asthma which stopped as soon as we movef out.

My father actually gave up smoking a few years ago as I refused to have him around my children when he smoked. He's now evangelical about it. We were at a restaurant a few weeks ago and whilst standing outside he had the audacity to complain about a person standing next to him smoking. Had to bite my tongue at that! 😂

SavoirFlair · Today 06:31
The hospital where my DD gets weekly treatment has an entrance to the specialist wing.

At the entrance are large NHS signs saying “this is a non smoking site - you can’t smoke outside the building or anywhere on site”

Huddled outside as we go in are usually around 5-10 patients, ranging from 20s to 70s in age, puffing away and not turning away, so my DD , a cancer patient, gets greeted with plumes of smoke every time we go in

The NHS trust when challenged point to the signage - there’s little else they feel they can do

Smoking is so inherently selfish though that I bet one of the smokers would say “get your toddler to wear a mask if you want to keep her safe from the fumes” etc.,they’re not going to change“

exactly the same at our large, local
hospital. Visiting a couple of weeks ago, the usual suspects huddled in the covered walkway immediately outside the entrance, directly under the “This is a no smoking site sign”. Selection of patients with walking frames, wheelchairs, drips and catheters and one of them a double amputee, all puffing on cigarettes and coughing.

Totally agree, so selfish and entitled

Worst thing is sitting next to a smoker reeking of smoke smell or being stuck behind them walking or at a bus stop or queue or something where you can't just move away and they are smoking. I do sympathise but I wish they would do it away from others and make sure their clothes and hair smell fresher.

Exactly. I took up smoking again after losing 4 family members in quick succession. It is a wonder that that’s all I did, and if that’s what I felt I needed to be able to function a little better then I’m honestly totally ok with that!

And in regards to the OP, as a smoker I dislike inconsiderate smokers too, and inconsiderate people in general.

That’s tough - have you tried vaping? Worked for some super hardcore smokers in my family, a couple of whom have managed to give up vaping as well now

It is the right word because smoking very much affects others and particularly negatively. Others around you are forced to breathe in your carcinogens & even if you only ever smoke alone & outside, your clothing carries the toxic chemicals into your home.
This is why parents of children with respiratory issues are now strongly advised to quit completely, the evidence is unequivocal.

If you live in Central London you're basically a smoker anyway because of the fumes / pollution.

Yes it is.

Agree. Notwithstanding the health problems they bring on themselves that the NHS and their families end up dealing with.
Cue the pearl clutchers screeching about other habits which cause health problems and ‘are they selfish too?’ Yep they are. I’ve put my popcorn on to pop 🤣🤣🤣

Yes they are very annoying. Always need to "just have a quick cigarette" and making everything take twice as long! If you go out for drinks or a meal with smokers you spend half your time sat alone at the table while they just " nip out for a quick fag"!

yanbu OP. Also subjecting others to their smoke. My parents both smoked when I was in the room, car, whatever as a child. I still think they would given half a chance even now.

It’s strange that on here people seem to be so involved in one person smoking. The smokers in our group don’t make a song and dance and don’t make everyone find somewhere they can smoke? They just pop off for a cigarette and generally just act like normal humans, it barely registers!

if your friend is making you late and being weird about where they can smoke it is definitely, definitely the friend and not the cigarettes doing that