To think life was 100% easier before kids

[Pleasecreateausername95]

I adore my dd, obviously…but it’s so hard at times, isn’t it? I’m starting to miss so many things now and I know I won’t get them back…or maybe in another 12-14 years perhaps…and it won’t be the same then as Dh and I will be older.
Would you like to go back to being child free for the weekend to see what it was like?

It was 💯 % easier. I love my kids, but I do miss the old days. Makes me look forward to retirement!!

Retirement is great.

I’m in my late 30’s and was still naive about how much my DD has altered the practical side of my life ( love her to bits) getting petrol, never having a chill weekend, not being able to be sick as you are still mum. Can no longer just pop into the supermarket everything is a mission , got to pack the kitchen sink and wrangle a screaming child in and out of a car seat - thank goodness for online shopping

Of course it was 100% easier. Most people realise this will be the case before they become parents. Duh!

@Judelawswife68 Okaaay

@Judelawswife68 Tbh I reckon a lot of people *Didnt realise it would be as hard as it is…

I didn't realise how difficult it would be! I was the naive idiot who thought that any kids would just fit in around my life. 🤣🤦🏼‍♀️ Wasn't quite expecting the absolute carnage that having one, never mind three creates and the constant demands, compromises and basically poverty it's created.

Don't get me wrong- I wouldn't change them but I'd bloody love a child free weekend to remember what it was like! 🤣

@lookslikeabombhitit Same!

Hell yes to the going back to child free for a weekend oh the possibilities..

I have 2 under 3. Neither in nursery and currently on mat leave. Yes it's as hard as it sounds.

Anyone else day dream about being in their early 20s late teens constantly. Such nostalgia. Youth is wasted on the young had never wrung truer.. Mental to think that phase of our lives is completely over.
Having my 2 dc every day I think it's the best and most bonkers decision I ever made...

Yes I really fantasise about a whole weekend off from parenting! If I just had a babysitter for the night I wouldn't go wild, but if I had one for the whole weekend I think it'd be great to go out with friends and have some drinks and a dance and not have to get up at 5.30 am.

I'm honestly amazed that my partner has willingly given up her childfree life to join my child-full one. 😂 We get the advantage of them going off eow to stay with their father, but even so.

Yes, life is harder with children. And more complicated. And more expensive. No, they don't slot in, you yourself have to contort around them instead. It eventually gets easier in some ways, but harder in others. And then they move out. Hopefully.

One thing my sister got really hung up on as I recall was feeling like she'd aged 10 years in the space between giving birth and weaning.

Yes it’s hard but it gets easier as they get older. One of mine is now quite independent and the other one is getting there. So we thought we’d have a third. Nuts! But life with a 12 year old is very different from life with say a 5/6 year old. I regularly wake up earlier than DS1 for a start!

Eh. My life is logistically harder, because there's more going on, but I had such incredibly poor mental health before my babies were born that I struggled to function. So life is much, much easier now.

Yes. Just running errands, nipping to the shop, whatever, is so much harder. I used to be out most evenings at the gym, going for drinks, having fun. Now I’m exhausted on the sofa, or catching up with work, before going to bed two hours earlier than I used to because I will probably be up far too early…

would recommend a weekend off if possible, though. DH and I each get a weekend per year, and a weekend together. It’s nice to look forward to!

My last born has just left home, it's awesome. I have so much time !

My DD is 4 1/2 months, and apart from a few bumps in the road she's generally an easy baby.

Everyone prepared me for the lack of sleep...it's all anyone said to me when I was pregnant 'you'll never sleep again' (as it happens she's a good sleeper so far).

Nothing prepared me for the constant worry you have as a parent and how that means you literally can never switch off, somedays I go to bed with headache from just overthinking everything all day long and that itself is exhausting. Just the fact you are 100% responsible for this little human 24/7. It's often overwhelming but I hope with time that will get easier. Someone tell me it does? lol.

Then I see other people with multiple kids, still going out drinking, weekends away, holidays with just their partners kids left at grandparents etc...and I'm like it MUST get easier or they are just better at switching off and being more carefree than me.

I do miss my old life and the old me and for the first 10 weeks I think I couldn't accept how much of a change my DD was to my life, I sort of rebelled against it and that made everything seem awful, but once I accepted life is now different and better, parenting became easier. That's not to say I wouldn't love a night just being me again at some point instead of just mummy.

Life was easier without kids but the grass is always greener, and before I had her or was pregnant, I used to look at other mums in the supermarket or garden centre and think to myself, one day I can't wait to have that. And now I do, so I try count my blessings no matter how up and down the parenting journey is!

@MangshorJhol What age would you say it gets easier?

MolliciousIntent yes, my life is easier too. So much more support and respect now. Single and childless was hell for me.

@Pleasecreateausername95 I am not a fan of babies per se. Although this current one is quite cute. But in general I like my sleep, I like a relatively neat house and I really like my sleep. So none of those are baby friendly. Everything after the age of 4 has seemed easier. I breastfed all my kids so sleep in the early days was non existent. But once we settle into a breastfeeding routine, I like a routine, and then when they are older I'm relatively firm about manners/behaviour that kind of thing. So even the middle one who is nearly 6 isn't all that wild. Everything after the age of 4 is easier. Once they get to double digits they are pretty good company. They develop a sense of humour, their own interests and so on. DS1 and I share some pretty niche interests and DS2 and DH have a lot in common. So meal times can be quite pleasant sometimes.
I will regret all this once the teenager years hit...

Agree with @MMumzoo5070 . I had my children really late in life, and honestly I was so bored of the lack of texture in my life before children - my life hadn't changed from when I was a teenager, and all the freedom was great but there were fewer people to do anything with as they all had families.

Speedweed thanks for your comment, I did write a big post about how life was when everyone was talking about 'Hard Working Families' and yet there I was an extremely hard working person with NO family expected to survive in a shit bedsit but deleted it because I still feel like nobody would get it. I now even have support from my child's school and my Husband's Family, life is completely different and all because of good luck. I work far less and am rewarded far more.

@Mumzoo5070 How do you have support from your child’s school?

Of course it was easier. Young, childless, less responsibility. That was then - and I dont want to go back to that time. Life moves on. Very quickly actually as DCs grow up fast. Id not have been without my DCs and now theyre grown up I have my time back. I have a social life, hobby, me time. Its good.

I'd say closer to 600%