Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not understand the nastiness that being a housewife provokes 2

867 replies

Alondra · 31/10/2022 11:55

Apologies for making a second part to this thread but I feel strongly about this issue.

Topgub

Possibly because there aren't any benefits

Few countries have a government system caring about women and children. The majority of our governments don't care if all have to work for a pittance to pay mortgage, bills and food when children are small because average couples need both wages. A system where nursery fees are stratospheric and eating half an average wage, and worse still, because parents working full time, making an average pay to be able to survive, have few serious tax concessions. Those tax concessions go to multinationals.

It's a system that only cares about productivity attached to $. If you are an engineer with projects worth a million dollars, your salary will be minimum 15% of that money annually. If you are a carer or a parent, there is no quoted money attached to your work, so you are in a low wage or no wage at all.

A woman with two kids working full time for an average salary has not gained much from my mother’s time. Working full time, taking care of the kids when they are home and doing the lion share of housework and rarely free time at all.

With housing costs, bills and health systems collapsing, I really fear for women in the next few years. We will get the short straw as we've always done, but it'll be a plus if, at least, we don't turn on each other.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:32

vodkaredbullgirl · 31/10/2022 19:19

OP I bet you wish you didn't started this thread.

I didn't start it.

But I don't particularly care that a bunch of bitter MN Karens disagree with me. MN attracts a certain type of woman usually - middle aged PTA school gate mum girlbossing vanilla types who think video games cause violence and men are the root of all evil. Couldn't really give a toss what people like that think.

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:33

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:29

We met at university, so you can take that "possibly an educated woman" nonsense elsewhere. It's also funny how you seem to assume the dynamics of the relationship are one sided - they're not.

Ok. I'll give you educated.

That still leave us with successful, independent and doesn't need him 👍

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:33

Fairylightsongs · 31/10/2022 19:29

Hmmm, swift dodge. Are you not looking after rhe tornado kids, dolling yourself up, loading up the anime porn and getting ready for a night of shagging?

I don't have to justify anything to you and I'm not going to. My life is better than yours and you can cope and seethe.

vodkaredbullgirl · 31/10/2022 19:34

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:32

I didn't start it.

But I don't particularly care that a bunch of bitter MN Karens disagree with me. MN attracts a certain type of woman usually - middle aged PTA school gate mum girlbossing vanilla types who think video games cause violence and men are the root of all evil. Couldn't really give a toss what people like that think.

I know you didn't start it but all I see is your name. Maybe you need to take a step back and don't let people annoy you.

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:34

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:33

I don't have to justify anything to you and I'm not going to. My life is better than yours and you can cope and seethe.

You sound about 14. It's almost endearing...

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:35

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:33

Ok. I'll give you educated.

That still leave us with successful, independent and doesn't need him 👍

Success doesn't just mean career, what a narrow minded view. And we both need each other - neither of us did pre marriage and technically both of us could survive alone - but the life we've built for ourselves relies on us being there for each other and supporting each other in the way that we do.

It's absolutely pathetic that you're attempting to sow discord in another woman's marriage because you absolutely can't stand to see another woman happy.

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:36

vodkaredbullgirl · 31/10/2022 19:34

I know you didn't start it but all I see is your name. Maybe you need to take a step back and don't let people annoy you.

I'm not annoyed, I'm enjoying this. The people commenting here are the sorts I despise and seeing them get annoyed that I'm happy with the life I lead is beautiful.

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:39

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:35

Success doesn't just mean career, what a narrow minded view. And we both need each other - neither of us did pre marriage and technically both of us could survive alone - but the life we've built for ourselves relies on us being there for each other and supporting each other in the way that we do.

It's absolutely pathetic that you're attempting to sow discord in another woman's marriage because you absolutely can't stand to see another woman happy.

Would you say you are a succesful woman @AMorningstar? In what way?

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:40

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:39

Would you say you are a succesful woman @AMorningstar? In what way?

In ways that I don't have to define to Internet strangers who mean nothing to me. Wink

vodkaredbullgirl · 31/10/2022 19:40

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:36

I'm not annoyed, I'm enjoying this. The people commenting here are the sorts I despise and seeing them get annoyed that I'm happy with the life I lead is beautiful.

ADHD does that to you, love the drama.

IhateHermioneGranger · 31/10/2022 19:41

You are putting in an awful lot of effort for someone who doesn't care what others think.

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:42

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:40

In ways that I don't have to define to Internet strangers who mean nothing to me. Wink

Why keep answering at all if you're only going to deflect... This is getting a little pathetic.

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:43

vodkaredbullgirl · 31/10/2022 19:40

ADHD does that to you, love the drama.

For someone with ADHD she's had no trouble staying focused on the single task of antagonising us for 24h straight...

vodkaredbullgirl · 31/10/2022 19:45

RandomMusings7 · 31/10/2022 19:43

For someone with ADHD she's had no trouble staying focused on the single task of antagonising us for 24h straight...

They just been an arse.

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:47

IhateHermioneGranger · 31/10/2022 19:41

You are putting in an awful lot of effort for someone who doesn't care what others think.

It's more that I enjoy giving people a taste of their own medicine. I couldn't give a toss if you don't like my choices but if you're going to be a dickhead to people then you'll get it back.

Refrosty · 31/10/2022 19:48

'Despise'...

Anyway, I don't see anyone unhappy that you're happy. I think many people have marriages that are just as happy, just different dynamics. You're touting a way of life that would leave a woman extremely vulnerable if she doesn't have family money or a husband who doesn't believe in divorce. Yours is a dangerous dream to sell to our daughters. I am in my 30s but I have witnessed your dream fall apart too many times. We can't all be so lucky, eh? Men are faithful to us. But, men also cheat. Men lose their jobs. Men get in life changing accidents. Men abandon their families when they grow bored. Men are not under our control, no matter how committed they tell you they are. Time passes. Values shift. People change. That's reality for most of us.

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:49

Refrosty · 31/10/2022 19:48

'Despise'...

Anyway, I don't see anyone unhappy that you're happy. I think many people have marriages that are just as happy, just different dynamics. You're touting a way of life that would leave a woman extremely vulnerable if she doesn't have family money or a husband who doesn't believe in divorce. Yours is a dangerous dream to sell to our daughters. I am in my 30s but I have witnessed your dream fall apart too many times. We can't all be so lucky, eh? Men are faithful to us. But, men also cheat. Men lose their jobs. Men get in life changing accidents. Men abandon their families when they grow bored. Men are not under our control, no matter how committed they tell you they are. Time passes. Values shift. People change. That's reality for most of us.

Women can do all of those things too. Some people are shit husbands and wives. What of it?

Topgub · 31/10/2022 19:55

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:49

Women can do all of those things too. Some people are shit husbands and wives. What of it?

The what of it is that its not a good idea to make yourself vulnerable

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:56

Topgub · 31/10/2022 19:55

The what of it is that its not a good idea to make yourself vulnerable

Don't marry a shithead who engages in tinder relationships and doesn't value marriage. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Refrosty · 31/10/2022 19:59

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 19:56

Don't marry a shithead who engages in tinder relationships and doesn't value marriage. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Now ma'am... Actually nevermind. You do you girl 🤣

Topgub · 31/10/2022 19:59

@AMorningstar

I didnt.

Thats OK 1 scenario.

I'm not making myself dependent on anyone else

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 20:01

Cool @Topgub no one is asking you to.

You do what you prefer and I'll do what I prefer. I know which lifestyle I'd rather have. I see so many people who don't treat marriage seriously or like the partnership it is, nor do people seem to truly love and adore each other. I think that's sad but everyone's free to do it if they want to.

Topgub · 31/10/2022 20:03

@AMorningstar

You did ask.

You asked what of it.

People are replying

I'm not sure what the rest of your post has to do with anything

AMorningstar · 31/10/2022 20:05

Topgub · 31/10/2022 20:03

@AMorningstar

You did ask.

You asked what of it.

People are replying

I'm not sure what the rest of your post has to do with anything

No one us asking you to be a housewife if you don't want to...

You're free to do as you wish. Like we all are.

Topgub · 31/10/2022 20:06

exactly

Swipe left for the next trending thread