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Original poster

Am I stingy? Boyfriend says i am?

390 replies

llpoolj · 29/10/2022 17:39

My boyfriend lives with me.
He earns £700 more than me a month.
He is always "skint"
He said he needed £20 for his phone.
So I said "il take it out of my savings account,just give me it on Monday when you get paid"
So then today he borrows another £10 and says so that's £310 I owe you Monday (£300 half of rent and bills )
I say no £330 ...£20 for phone too
He said "really ,your going to take that off me"
"I only topped up because you wanted me too"
(He didn't -he told me he needed to top up"
So he says "you know I would give you my last"
I said I buy you so much
I spent £10 buying him McDonald's today,I bought the food all week
I spent £170 last week on concert tickets for his birthday -then 2 hoodies for his birthday.
I reminded him of this and he says "no you can't class the tickets for my birthday -you wanted to go too"
I also bought us Xmas pjs for £30 two days ago

So how does he have the audacity to say I'm tight?
I just wanted it back to in my savings.
I'm feeling shitty and horrible now
I'm honestly not tight -I just don't want to get the mick took out of me

We go on holiday in two weeks
I've bought the sun tan lotion,after sun,case straps ,case locks ,luggage tags ,case scales,I bought him shorts for holiday and 2 tees and god knows what else

OP posts:
altmember · 30/10/2022 20:45

So he has £700 a month more income than you but is always broke? I'd be concerned about where all his money is actually going. Do you know? If you've no idea, and he has nothing to show for it, then it's quite likely feeding an addiction of some kind - gambling, drugs, sex (paid for).

restingbitchface30 · 30/10/2022 20:53

Your boyfriend is a bit of a dick. I’m not going to mince my words sorry

Silentwitless · 30/10/2022 20:55

Please don't stay with this user.

Solonge · 30/10/2022 20:56

llpoolj · 29/10/2022 17:39

My boyfriend lives with me.
He earns £700 more than me a month.
He is always "skint"
He said he needed £20 for his phone.
So I said "il take it out of my savings account,just give me it on Monday when you get paid"
So then today he borrows another £10 and says so that's £310 I owe you Monday (£300 half of rent and bills )
I say no £330 ...£20 for phone too
He said "really ,your going to take that off me"
"I only topped up because you wanted me too"
(He didn't -he told me he needed to top up"
So he says "you know I would give you my last"
I said I buy you so much
I spent £10 buying him McDonald's today,I bought the food all week
I spent £170 last week on concert tickets for his birthday -then 2 hoodies for his birthday.
I reminded him of this and he says "no you can't class the tickets for my birthday -you wanted to go too"
I also bought us Xmas pjs for £30 two days ago

So how does he have the audacity to say I'm tight?
I just wanted it back to in my savings.
I'm feeling shitty and horrible now
I'm honestly not tight -I just don't want to get the mick took out of me

We go on holiday in two weeks
I've bought the sun tan lotion,after sun,case straps ,case locks ,luggage tags ,case scales,I bought him shorts for holiday and 2 tees and god knows what else

Can you tell me what you see in him? why are you in this relationship? if you were my daughter I would be devastated you are keeping a lazy cheapskate. You are funding him....he is using you.

Pollyputthekettleonha · 30/10/2022 20:56

He is the tight one, not you. He is a parasite. Please get rid of him, you can do much better I'm sure.

CoffeeBeansGalore · 30/10/2022 20:59

@llpoolj I met my now dh when I was 17. My mum was away on an extended holiday and I'd had to pay an unexpected bill out of my own money as she hadn't left enough. He asked why I was quiet. Told him had no money left for shopping & didn't have enough in to last until payday. He took me shopping, said get whatever you need. He wouldn't let me pay him back.
He would still give me the last penny in his pocket after 34 years together.

Set your bar higher. Stop being used by someone who does not appreciate you. Someone who loves you will make you a priority, not drain you.

Icantfindmykeys · 30/10/2022 21:01

Tell him to F right off…he’s taking the piss!

Caelan2018 · 30/10/2022 21:02

How long are are together was it his idea to live together there ate lots of red flags here like maybe bad credit of an addiction u don't know about yet can u see yourself marrying this man or having kids with him .. I would sat it's not going to work out RUN ....

Cakecakecheese · 30/10/2022 21:02

He's taking you for a mug and is trying to gaslight you into thinking you're in the wrong. You really need to get rid.

Motherofalittledragon · 30/10/2022 21:11

Why on earth are you with this whinging fuckwit?

amccabe15 · 30/10/2022 21:29

Ditch him. It won’t get better!

Sennelier1 · 30/10/2022 21:32

She doesn't ask him to pay for the tickets! She only mentions she spent a lot of money to please him.

BaconChops · 30/10/2022 21:34

Slippery slope sister-he treats you like this now?! What does the future hold……

Maddison12 · 30/10/2022 21:41

Don't think this is going the way OP thought it would 👀

Navigatinglife2022 · 30/10/2022 21:41

Eurgh. How old are you both?? Who has a top up phone these days? Is he 12?

Earns £700 more than you and yet he treats you like his mum?

He clearly has money problems. Get rid.

0nTheEdge · 30/10/2022 21:47

I had a boyfriend like this once. All his money went on coke and fruit machines so he was happy to spend mine for everything else.
When he slept over, he didn't want to share my single bed so we made another set up on the floor. He expected me to sleep on the floor when he was round and not take turns because I got to sleep in my bed when he wasn't there. This was the tip of the iceberg.
I had no self esteem at all, but finally started doing things for myself like starting a hobby and socialising with other people. He kicked back as didn't like losing control. It was the first step in me having more to my life than that pathetic excuse for a human being.
Is there anything you can do positive for yourself? Take a friend to the gig that isn't viewed his birthday present? Put yourself first and know that you're worthy of so much more!

Pixiedust1234 · 30/10/2022 22:25

Navigatinglife2022 · 30/10/2022 21:41

Eurgh. How old are you both?? Who has a top up phone these days? Is he 12?

Earns £700 more than you and yet he treats you like his mum?

He clearly has money problems. Get rid.

Seeing as how op hasn't returned i will answer one of your questions. I have a top up phone. Cant afford, or need, a contract.

I'm guessing the bf finds it easier to get girls to pay the top up rather than pay his monthly bill. Chats them up in the pub, exchange numbers then says he can't call until payday unless girl lends a tenner. Rinse and repeat in next pub. Clever really.

Mamanyt · 30/10/2022 22:44

To be perfectly blunt, I hope the sex is really, really good, because you seem to be paying for it. Dump this guy and find a man who isn't looking for a mommy who puts out.

LoisLane66 · 30/10/2022 22:51

More fool you. Don't complain when it's in your own hands to stop his behaviour. What do you expect us to say? The only person who can stop his nonsense is...?

LoisLane66 · 30/10/2022 22:55

The fact that he wears hoodies says it all.

Ladyof2022 · 30/10/2022 23:00

TheRossatron · 29/10/2022 17:43

How can women have sex with these kinds of men and find them attractive?

He's a shameless, freeloading cunt. He would be out of my life and my sight faster than a fart in the wind. Fucking rancid.

THIS X 100

Blocked · 30/10/2022 23:04

Jackster11 · 30/10/2022 18:47

Have you thought about having a joint "spending money" account ?

Do not get a joint account with this cocklodger!!!!!

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 30/10/2022 23:06

llpoolj · 29/10/2022 17:43

@Itsallyellow22 he won't buy anything ,then he will complain that I have new clothes and he has nothing.
I can't win

For gods sake get rid of him

T1Dmama · 30/10/2022 23:16

STOP spending so much on him… as you e already said he actually earns ALOT more than you do!
I would be telling him that if the ticket for the concert isn’t a birthday present then he can pay for his one!! Or sell his to a friend and go with someone else!! Sorry but he sounds like a right prick…. He’d give you his last penny but won’t pay you back what he borrowed?! Yeah sounds legit!!!!
Stop lending him money, stop buying him so much…. I bet he never treats you to new clothes etc…. You’re allowing yourself to be a doormat and I think you should tell him that from now on stuff like suncream, tickets etc need to be split down the middle as he earns more than you and needs to learn to budget!!!
Sorry but you’re not tight, he’s just abusing you financially by allowing you to pay for everything then having the audacity to say the ticket can’t be a present because you’re going too! WTAF!!!!! Honestly I wouldn’t give him that ticket now and I’d take someone else!!!!!

T1Dmama · 30/10/2022 23:18

She didn’t say he had to pay for the ticket… she said it was a birthday present and he says no because she’s going too… read it again

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