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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that transing young children is a medical scandal?

291 replies

WandaWomblesaurus · 22/10/2022 02:53

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11342541/Dr-Az-Hakeem-says-parents-claimed-kids-trans-NHS-Tavistock-transing-factory-clinic.html

"I remember saying to them, this is madness. What we're doing is madness. These are children. These are three-year-olds."
Are we seriously saying this is ok? I feel like as a society we have gone mad, allowing this to happen to young children.

AIBU to think this is child abuse? And if you disagree how do you justify three and four year olds being transed?

OP posts:
TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 12:57

Because unless the body part is life limiting

people with this disorder would say it is life limiting. So why wouldn't you believe them? If you'd believe someone who says that about their penis?

Moonatics · 22/10/2022 13:00

helpyhelperton · 22/10/2022 11:55

I need help understanding this.

If a child displays the desire to be the opposite sex, isn't it invalidating to say that they can't be, when there are transgender people on this earth? Isn't that a lie?

Research has shown that the decision making part of the brain doesn't develop till we are 25. That would certainly backup the idea that children can be very easily confused, influenced and make bad decisions etc, so I completely agree that transformation should take place as late as possible. I don't know what age - I assume that procedures are taking place a puberty to improve the chance of it being successful?

But what do we do about those young people who feel they are the wrong gender and this persists beyond a 'phase'?

It's a genuine question because some of the vehemence on here frightens me, it seems very invalidating.

You really know nothing at 3, 7 and at 16! You are constantly learning but surely if you have sustained a desire to change (and I believe it's torture for some young people and their families) aren't we making it worse and isolating them but denying it's a possibility to change?

No one can ever actually be the opposite sex. Cant invalidate something that's not true.
Until very recently almost all trans people, transitioned after puberty, I dont mean the famous child in Florida and a few others, I mean the ones on the street, those with the acronym I'm not allowed to mention.

So if middle aged men (with the acronym) can transition simply by a name change and keep their girly penis (most do keep it) why do teens have to go through so much surgery and hormones? To pass? The middle aged men dont pass, not a one of them, so why do children have to try to pass?
The famous floridian child transitioner, never really passed, but the older they get, the more strikingly obvious they are not a woman. And that was with hormones, blockers, so many surgeries.

If we dont actually mature until 25 years old, then maybe we should not allow transition until past that age?
Again children especially toddlers can never be trans. Because toddlers dont buy clothes. And more importantly if a child of that age wanted to remove their penis or get a penis I would be on high alert for CSA. It would be the first thing I'd look for in fact well before I got down to trans.

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:01

Once again, can you please explain what you mean by male / female 'tissue'?

Anything that a male or female has inside their bodies - eg it’s common for intersex people to have both a uterus and testicles inside their bodies.

If you are female you will most likely have a uterus.
You DH will most likely have a prostate, vans deferens, testifies etc.
An intersex person usually has a mixture of both male and female tissue, organs and psychical attributes.

I hope this makes sense.

TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 13:02

eg it’s common for intersex people to have both a uterus and testicles inside their bodies.

No it isn't. Please stop embarrassing yourself here.

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:02

people with this disorder would say it is life limiting. So why wouldn't you believe them? If you'd believe someone who says that about their penis?

Where have I said that having or not having a penis is life limiting?
And where have I said it should be done on the NHS?

Please don’t lie.

TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 13:03

Humans have either the mechanism to produce eggs OR to produce sperm. No one has functional mechanism to produce both.

Rainbowshit · 22/10/2022 13:04

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:01

Once again, can you please explain what you mean by male / female 'tissue'?

Anything that a male or female has inside their bodies - eg it’s common for intersex people to have both a uterus and testicles inside their bodies.

If you are female you will most likely have a uterus.
You DH will most likely have a prostate, vans deferens, testifies etc.
An intersex person usually has a mixture of both male and female tissue, organs and psychical attributes.

I hope this makes sense.

No it doesn't make sense because this is utter nonsense. 🙈🙈

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:04

No it isn't. Please stop embarrassing yourself here.

😂😂😂

Why are you claiming to know about something which you obviously have no idea on and that anyone can just quickly Google it to see that you are wrong.

I’ll leave this here for you.

www.healthline.com/health/baby/what-does-intersex-look-like

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:05

Humans have either the mechanism to produce eggs OR to produce sperm. No one has functional mechanism to produce both.

I believe all intersex people are infertile.

TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 13:05

Please don’t lie.

I'm not the one lying 😂

so what are you saying? You do support people chopping off their legs if they pay for it themselves?

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:06

No it doesn't make sense because this is utter nonsense. 🙈

@Rainbowshit please see my above link.

I’m happy to answer questions as best as I can.

TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 13:07

I’ll leave this here for you

There lots of nonsense on the internet, we'll find on finding some 🤣

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:08

so what are you saying? You do support people chopping off their legs if they pay for it themselves?

If they are an adult, mentally sound and are paying for it themselves then they can do what they want.

I am planning on having a breast reduction.

It’s not life limiting but my boobs are too big for my frame so give me back ache and I find it hard to find clothes to fit properly.

This is completely my choice.

IncompleteSenten · 22/10/2022 13:08

When these children grow up, I predict there will be a LOT of legal action.

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:10

There lots of nonsense on the internet, we'll find on finding some

There are lots of journal articles but I thought considering you’re confused over it already, that they’ll be too much for you to understand.

Feel free to read up on it in your spare time though. I find it fascinating.

For now I think it’s best we stop derailing the thread though. Unless you have any more questions for me?

AndyWarholsPiehole · 22/10/2022 13:12

For now I think it’s best we stop derailing the thread though. Unless you have any more questions for me?

I have a question. Do you really believe that souls and brains can be racially catagorised?

TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 13:13

There are lots of journal articles but I thought considering you’re confused over it already, that they’ll be too much for you to understand.

I don't doubt your ability to unearth further nonsense, trust me 🤣

Musti · 22/10/2022 13:13

Mexicola · 22/10/2022 06:39

It’s absolutely awful and scary.

I’m a woman/female XX.

when I was a child I was a “tomboy” (I hate to use that word as it reinforces gender stereotypes).

I found the sports, hobbies and toys that boys were “allowed” to do much more interesting than the traditional feminine things thrust upon me.

I had cropped hair, wore “boys” clothes and climbed trees, had transformed toys and wrestled. All my friends were boys.

I told everyone I was a boy and my name was Junior (from Popeye!)

I didn’t want to have a penis, I am heterosexual. I just didn’t want the gender stereotypes forced upon me.

by 12/13 I had grown my hair long but I’ve always been quite masculine in my ways. (90’s ladette culture appealed to me)

I fear that if I was raised now I could end up in some kind of gender clinic and told I am trans!! It scares me what these young people are being forced on.

What mostly annoys me is I think it’s still down to stereotypes now and what society forces on children.

my son once said to me he wanted to be a girl and I asked why. He said so he could do crafts like his sister. I had no idea where that came from but course he has access to crafts at home!

it’s all down to society. Who says boys can’t wear skirts or make up etc.

scary stuff. A lot of attention seeking and in fashion. I agree with a lot of what Bob Withers says.

This.

To do such irreversible stuff to kids is absolutely unforgivable.

It also takes away their ability to reproduce and find sexual pleasure. It is sick.

Let them dress and call themselves whatever they want. But drugs and surgery should be when they’re adults after a lot of counselling and trying it.

TheKeatingFive · 22/10/2022 13:14

Do you really believe that souls and brains can be racially catagorised?

or that there's such a thing as a disabled soul?

newnamethanks · 22/10/2022 13:17

YANBU. It's atrocious and Tavistock should never be allowed to pursue any more of its practices with under 18s.

Rainbowshit · 22/10/2022 13:22

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:05

Humans have either the mechanism to produce eggs OR to produce sperm. No one has functional mechanism to produce both.

I believe all intersex people are infertile.

There's a whole range of DSDs (less offensive term than intersex), some of which result in infertility. But many that do not. You are being incredibly offensive.

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:29

I have a question. Do you really believe that souls and brains can be racially
catagorised?

Without going into too much detail I do know of a few albino people.
2 of them were raised by white people.

All of them identify as black.

I have only ever met one black person who didn’t identify as black but that was, I believe, based on stereotypes and believing that liking X,Y,Z means he isn’t ‘black enough’.

I believe your insides (like your genes) determine your identity like race.

And no I do not believe if you have the genes of a particular race you can then transfer to a different race (I’m sure someone would have asked that question).

There is also a recognised issue with mixed race people finding it a challenge growing up because they identify as 2 races, especially if raised by a one race family.

I don’t think it’s for me to speak on behalf of an entire race of people but the majority of black people will tell you it’s not just their skin colour that makes us black.

helpyhelperton · 22/10/2022 13:30

I find this whole 'topic' mind blowing.

I really don't know enough about it and the more I read the more I get confused.

I wish we all were just happy with our bodies and people were allowed to just present themselves in the way they feel comfortable.

My head hurts after reading this thread.

SilverGlitterBaubles · 22/10/2022 13:30

YANBU I think this is a huge scandal all pushed by an extreme very vocal minority. The whole thing has got so muddled in the pressure to be unquestionably tolerant and open minded embracing everything. Schools have also been caught up in this madness, I feel for those teachers who have tried to stand up to it only to be cancelled or called out and some sort of bigot.

Imagine if the same resources put into these clinics and treatments were children's wellbeing and mental health. I really feel we have let these kids down badly in lots of cases.

FWIW I know 3 young people at DCs schools who are transitioning- they are deeply troubled and unhappy individuals so opening the door to all this has not been a magical fix. The effects of the medication they take is horrible, I mean imagine being a teenager is hard enough and then this on top.

CarefreeMe · 22/10/2022 13:31

@Rainbowshit

You jumped ship quickly.

You said I was talking utter nonsense not long ago.

Now it seems you’ve had a quick read up and realised you were wrong, so are now trying to say I’m being offensive by saying that those born with both male and female sex glands are usually infertile which is true.

Make your mind up.

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