This is so complicated, so apologies for length, but I am consumed by this and can't get any advice as everyone I know is just saying, shit yeah, that's a tough one!
Essentially due to financial difficulty due to my health condition we are having to sell up and downsize to pay off debts. After a long time trying to sell, we are taking a hit on our place, and we have found a house that is at the limit of our budget and needs everything doing.
We had so much difficulty finding something which worked in terms of the space we need, budget and location for commutes we decided it was fine, we'd live with dated decor, plywood floorboards, peeling finishes and a bit of damp in a rear WC, fix things like all the wires hanging out the walls, and manage with a bathroom and kitchen that were 30 years old for a while in order to have a garden for our kids. Plus it has some period charm and its relatively spacious and close to a train station, and should we win the lottery we could extend etc. It looked like areas had been patched up which made me a bit suspicious - i.e. some areas freshly painted but other parts clearly left for years, but everything in the same area in our budget seems to be run down anyway, as the wave of gentrification has not spread that far - the only reason we can afford to buy there, I guess.
We were the first to see it and were told our offer was beaten by another bidder but the vendors chose us due to being proceedable, as they had a previous sale fall through. Who knows if that's true, but given the dearth of available houses in the area I'm prepared to believe they could find another buyer without much difficulty. For context they are a late middle-aged couple having an acrimonious divorce so there is no chain, which we thought was great, but actually puts them in a position of power compared to us, with our buyers waiting for us to move and panicking about the interest rates so kind of a flight risk. The house is in a rough area (it's the bad bit of Croydon), is on the end of a street which is ok for the area, but parking will be hell and it's a bit grotty. But I am a Londoner and I can cope with that. Grateful to still be in the position to buy a house, ultimately.
Anyway, we had the survey and then a proper independent damp survey (the stakes are quite high here for me with health concerns) and found a number of issues. The highlights are irremediable damp due to high ground in adjacent alleyway, meaning the whole side of the house is registering as damp, even though none is visible. Incidentally that is the only part of the house which has been wallpapered relatively recently. There is also evidence of a previous damp proof course. What it needs is the render removed, brickwork assessed, replastering.. it goes on. The whole house is basically quite humid, has cheapo damp solutions which are making it worse, and given we viewed it in August I'm guessing that was when it was at its best. Essentially we could not do the house piecemeal as we had planned due to the fact that everything needs to be done, and you can't repaint a house if the walls need to be replastered and floors need to be redone, and the render needs to come off etc.
Then the roof has a bloody hole in it with visible water ingress in one of the rooms, which has significantly worsened since our first viewing. It's blocked gutters, cracked cement on the roof, damaged timbers etc. This is on top of the fact that basically every single bit of the house needs attention.
So we asked for a 30k drop in price which I knew they would reject but hoped they would meet us halfway. This is about 7% of the asking price (which was 475 and we agreed 470). They refused to drop the price, saying the defects we listed were factored into the cost of the house, and said they were going to have a family member who was a roofer attend to the repairs (why the f is the roof leaking then..?!). I got a rough estimate of the roof repairs from a reliable guy who said about 4k. We said this was not acceptable due to conflict of interest, and I suspected a patch up job, given the fact the house was in a bit of a state, but they wouldn't budge and we reasoned at least it would be done. (I'm long in the tooth with roof drama). The roof is easy to fix, if costly. But it's not the end of the world.
The cost of the render/damp drama however is about 20k all in, and a huge amount of work, and the survey says it can only be managed due to the high ground. There are other issues like a sewer in the garden which would hinder any extensions and frankly there's bound to be other stuff. We had two construction people go in and assess and they said it was "a good house" which reassured me, but then the surveyor said he wouldn't buy it based on the sheer amount of work it needed. They eventually agreed to fix the roof and drop the price 3k. At first I said I wanted 10k or we'd pull out, and we would have, but in the end we just can't find anything else that doesn't present similar potential issues, or other compromises we have ruled against, like no garden, or one room less. I feel like we've already decided on a rough area and a house with 100k of work needed, so I have to at least have enough space or I'll be throwing away half our stuff.
So we agreed to the 3k and the BIL roofer, but I just feel like I don't want to be a mug. I can't tell if I'm crazy to consider buying a house in a shitty area needing 100k of work to make it decent (this isn't being precious, this is conservative given it's 100+ years old and poorly maintained) without insisting they drop the price more, or if given the climate this is the best we will do and we should just accept it, as the alternative is a flat in a better area but with no garden, no space for storage and the charges. I am paralysed as this is such a high stakes decision, and the cost of moving not to mention the upheaval is such that we simply cannot afford a mistake. So is the mistake to buy a money pit and still be skint, or to live in a smaller place and risk never ever affording a house again. There are almost identical houses down the street that are immaculately done which sold for 20-50k more this year, and I feel like this means we are overpaying, given the fact we'd have to do all the work. But then I think the vendors consider they are selling us the potential. What to do?!