What’s a subtle sign that a person is a good person?

[YouAreNotBatman]

As in you can just tell they are good people in an average situation.

Maybe you just haven't met any sociopaths, then. They are bad people. That's just the way they are made. They don't care about hurting people, and are perfectly capable of doing good things if it will benefit them. But it doesn't change that they are bad in their core. These are every day people, not anomalies.

But these are just social skills that can be learnt. Often people who are standing offish are very shy. These things don't indicate whether someone is "good".

Do you think that carnivores are bad unethical animals? I’m legitimately curious. Should we ethically eliminate them until they are extinct because their existence requires the consumption of other species? I mean it’s only the right thing to do you know. After all other animals are suffering as a result of their existence.

Shall I euthanize my cat because he is an obligate carnivore or shall I switch him to a vegan diet and shorten his life by permanently damaging his kidneys? Yes I’ve actually looked into feline vegan diets. They do not bode well for cats.

Or does this line of thinking only apply to humans?

Its unethical for a wolf to violently tear a rabbit apart for a meal but for a human to shoot one is awful?

I hear vegans and vegetarians often boldly saying things like “I WOULD RATHER DIE THAN EAT AN ANIMAL.” But when they are asked the hard questions like

but would you rather your child starve/die than eat an animal?

They suddenly start dodging the question and proclaiming things like “oh but I would never be so selfish as to procreate. That is the worse thing you can possibly do!” forgetting that not every woman gets this option. Consider rape or sexual assault or simply “oops the pill didn’t work/condom broke.” Especially now that abortion is banned in many parts of the united states.

I find the most unethical people are often the ones proclaiming to be unquestionably ethically superior to others never doubting their choices. Never asking themselves if it is fair to project their decisions onto others. Assuming that it is a perfect cookie cutter for decisions for all. When it’s really not always that black and white.

And I think that is why many folks distance themselves from folks that state things like this.

Vegans and vegetarians are really quick to turn their backs on themselves. lol So I think that makes the biggest statement of all about them as a general group of people. 😂

*stand offish

I would agree with this.

I'm autistic. I find it awkward talking to people. I forget to smile. I don't make eye contact. I come across abrupt at times. If these things are indicators of "good" then I must be very bad.

Well, I wasn’t going to get into it at this hour for my own sanity but… yeah!

Always observe how they treat the least powerful person in the room or talk about the least powerful members of society.

It always comes down to kindness. Not charm, not clean shoes, not remembering conversations - just kindness.

@PriOn1 I can assure you that I don't virtue signal. I live by the decisions I've made to be cruelty-free, I felt like a big hypocrite! I'm sure there are others out there too.

It is called cognitive dissonance too. Are you refuting that?

What the hell does 'produced humanely' mean by the way? Are you producing meat?

I eat meat and work hard to ensure it’s produced humanely.

If you work hard to ensure you buy "humanely" produced meat, then you must be interested in the animal living a good life. So why does your interest in them living a good life not extend to the part where they're prematurely slaughtered?

@DaughterofDawn you took all that from my little paragraph?

So, as far as I'm concerned, any obligate carnivore can kill it's prey, and although I don't wish to see it, humans are not carnivores! We are classed as omnivores - although we can certainly live on a plant-based diet. I have done for the last 6 years. I haven't died of protein deficiency yet.

Does the lion, tiger, wolf or bear get to shop at Tesco, Sainsbury's or Asda? More to the point, do they perpetuate and agree with 75 billion land animals slaughtered each year for human consumption? They kill animals as they see fit - they are obligatory carnivores.

Then you go on to talk about procreation. Sorry if you've had some stupid conversations with some idiotic vegans. I'm not one of those.

Integrity, kindness, being considerate. I like the C.S. Lewis quote about integrity - doing the right thing even when no one is watching. My DH and his siblings are like that, and I'm lucky to know a handful of others.

I plod along, trying to follow their excellent example!

They are kind to animals

Judges people based on their name (IRL or otherwise)

I'm not sure what the baby names thread is like now (haven't looked in about 6 years) But it was quite horrible at one point. If I had met anyone of those posters, I wouldn't think of them as a nice person

Read wrong 😑 Opposite of what I said

Just realised you asked for subtle signs. I immediately thought of Andy Murray refusing to buddy-smirk the journo's self-correction in this clip www.theguardian.com/sport/video/2017/jul/13/andy-murray-corrects-journalist-wimbledon-overlooking-female-video

taking care of their family members when they dont have too and noone sees.

Well some of the most nasty malicious people I’ve known (thankfully only a few) have been very charming to strangers, know how to look and act the part. So when it comes to being nasty they’re very sophisticated in how they do things. And it makes you feel like utter shit as they then gaslight you and because they’re so lovely to the ‘little people’ nobody believes anything you say because you don’t have the people skills to win people over. Master manipulators so in my experience you don’t really know especially if they’re good at projecting a certain image of themselves right down to the fine details.

If you're at a work or social event they aren't scanning the room while talking to you to to see who might be a better option for them. 😆

Thinking of two very good people I know, I would saying doing “good things” without telling everyone you are doing them so you only find out in passing comments over a prolonged time exactly how many good things they do. Say for example 2 different people donate to a food bank ( a good thing) one person does it regularly and quietly the 2nd person posts on Facebook asking where they can make a BIG food bank donation to get attention and all the “you are so kind hun” messages. Same good outcome in that foodbank gets donations so it’s not just the act, it’s the different way people go about it. Also apart from the school PTA, when I have been volunteering ( different organisations over the years) there definitely seems to be a much higher percentage of good people ( I do not include myself in this) volunteering than there is in the general population.
Also I think being a blood donor ( if you are able to) is a marker of a good person, but not enough on its own to qualify you as a good person.

They are kind. To others, to themselves.

Some of the loveliest people I know are very quiet, unassuming and probably “unfriendly” when you first meet them. I agree about quietly doing things with integrity.

I know plenty of friendly outgoing people who seem virtuous and tell you about it but who aren’t particularly genuine

i must be a sociopath as I eat meat and have dirty shoes.

I’m not virtue signalling - I’m by no means perfect and probably don’t always manage to be a good person although I try… but it makes me sad that so many close their mind to the cruelty of what happens in slaughter houses and factory farming. Most animals are so innocent and defenceless, and they all have their own personalities… just like cats and dogs… And some are babies, like lambs and calves. It breaks my heart thinking of what happens to them just for our tastebuds when we have so many options these days.

But then I see videos of people going above and beyond to rescue a trapped duck or a sheep stuck in barbed wire, and people getting emotional in the comments, and I wonder what they then go home and eat.

I do think if people had to watch their meat being killed in front of them then most wouldn’t want to eat it. I know I wouldn’t. But I used to eat meat, it tastes great… At the time I just didn’t think about what it was and what happened to it.

Like the comments show though, some people hate when you talk about it as they feel judged. (Not my intention, as I said I used to eat meat and not think about the live animals too).

Many things people have already commented on such as being decent to people serving you in a restaurant or shop. Making sure to include others in conversation in a group setting. Just generally showing consideration for others, it seems that more men than not just aren't very good at this.

I knew my (now) husband was a lovely person soon after we met but he definitely demonstrated it when he showed concern for my female colleague to get safely home from a pub one evening and made sure she had a reputable taxi booked. He's also gone out of his way to walk female friends/colleagues home on occasions.

itsallright it’s a fair point. I live quite rurally and have rescued my fair share of animals. I love animals

I have flirted with veganism and felt so utterly awful that I couldn’t live like that. I do believe some people struggle more than others

i think the dairy industry is as bad and so I restrict dairy and buy local meat.

it does worry me still. I also think we wouldn’t have any of these animals at all if everyone stopped eating them. Perhaps that would be no bad thing

My best friend is one of the best people I know, and what I particularly like about her is that she actually listens. Most people don't listen, they just wait for their turn to talk. It shows up in little things and big things. Like just for example, I casually mentioned that I like a shirt but really couldn't justify buying it, I had plenty. One month later she gave it to me for my birthday.