How often do you have fights with your other half?

[bookworm1982]

I'm talking like shouting in each other's faces. My husband and I have been together for twenty years. We seem to do it a few times a year. Otherwise we get on well. He thinks it's normal. Is it?

Thank goodness it's not just me! We're sweary and passionate too!
We bicker regularly but once or twice a month we do get shouty!
Nothing major, just petty things. Then we apologise and makeup.
Til the next time!
Quite normal I think! Nobody's perfect but he's perfect for me!

I don't think we've ever shouted in each other's face though; we've shouted at each other in the same room and DH once broke a sieve in frustration.😂

We've never shouted at each other. We've had disagreements but no more than that

We’re both sweary shouty passionate people.

Being passionate and not having control of your emotions and behaviour are two entirely different things.

Never in each other's faces. DP never argues with me at all. It's actually me that will make snide remarks when I'm on a petty one.

I say fortnightly coz he’s on a ten day rota so six shifts on three off (the last shift is a nightshift so ends at 7am the next day) and there will be something within there that will happen to make us blow up. If he’s still arguing then he still wants to fix what’s wrong is the way I se it

Never.

We disagree now and then but talk before it gets like that.

17 years and maybe 3/4 shouting arguments in total.

OH and I have been together for almost 20 years.

We have had ONE 'shouty in your face'-type argument in that time, when we were both in our mid-20s and never since.

Of course we disagree and bicker from time to time (he can be a bit sulky, I have been known to slam the odd door), but we're not temperamentally shouty people and I couldn't be with somebody who thought that regular stand-up screaming matches were 'normal'.

Literally never. Together 14 years and we have never had a screaming/shouting argument. We’ve had maybe 1 or 2 disagreements but nothing I can really remember. We just tend to agree on everything!

Why do people accept behaviour from partners that they wouldn’t accept from friends? I’ve never understood this. If a friend shouted in my face I would never speak to them again. Why is it that some people with accept that kind of thing from the person who should love and care about them the most?
My husband and I have argued, mostly bickered and sometimes sulked with each other. It’s always forgotten about quickly or ends with a conversation where we work to understand one another and make compromises if needed. But we have never shouted in each other’s faces.

Shouting in each others’ faces? Never.

Argue, very occasionally - twice a year?

Bicker - occasionally. Once a month?

And of course your kids have heard you shouting at each other. And they will have been scared / upset by it.

We might be a bit snappy from time to time but we’ve never shouted/sworn at each other.

Rare
Once or twice a year if that, do I raise my voice or he raises his....last time I shouted O FGS !

Actually shouting, maybe 3-5 times since we've been together (17 years). Mainly in the early stages of our relationship when we were still getting to know each other and develop our communication skills. I really think that learning to disagree with someone in a healthy way is a skill that needs to be learned.

I don't think shouting or screaming in each others faces is ever healthy though.

Only 3 years together but never. I'm not saying we don't disagree or get frustrated with each other at times, but we talk about it, not shout in each other's faces.

I've had two relationships in the past with screaming rows. Both were deeply toxic and abusive.

Never. Not once in 27 years.

Of course we have disagreements and issues arise from time to time like any couple. Sometimes things get a bit heated, and if anyone raises their voice, it’s invariably me. But shouting & screaming in each other’s faces? Never.

I have never had a row with anyone. I definitely wouldn't want to be in a relationship that involved shouting at one another. We do of course disagree, then he sees that I'm right and all is well 😁

It's normal OP. Everyone I know has arguments. Good for those who never argue but don't let them convince you it's the norm for everyone. My parents were/are shouty they've been married over 50 years and adore each other. I don't feel I've been damaged by hearing my parents have a few barneys over the years.

There's a big difference between having an argument, where you and your spouse might disagree about something and talk it through - which is normal, and shouting in each other's faces. That isn't, and shouldn't be, normal.

Yep.

It’s those that never disagree on anything that are the ones to watch. It’s dysfunctional not to be able to express difference, and there are always some differences between two people that live side by side for decades and decades.

How did you learn this?

It's really interesting to understand how people can change such ingrained character traits.

We bicker a few times a week. Proper shouty argument perhaps once a month. But that’s generally from across the room. We’ve never shouted in each other’s faces.
The up shot is once we’ve cleared the air we’re always fine again within half an hour.

We argue. That's normal and healthy. We don't fight.

This. Absolutely.

I don't remember anyone on this thread saying they never argue or never disagree.
Most, however are saying they have never shouted in someone's face and would not put up with someone doing it to them.