To refuse a school home visit?

[CoffeePlease93]

My son has just started school this year so I don’t know if this is the norm or not?

So apparently his school (not the teachers) does home visits with all the new parents to discuss any issues going on and for a chit chat (and probably just to be nosey around your home too!)

I have already had to reschedule once because we -all had COVID but I’ve got it coming up again now but it’s just such an inconvenience! I work from home, have a medical procedure coming up which I have several appointments beforehand and I also have a private issue going on (legal issues) which is requiring a lot of solicitor appointments and admin stuff at home at the moment too.

There has been no issues with my son at school whatsoever, he is doing amazingly well, glowing reports, I have brilliant communication with his actual teachers - I don’t need any extra support with anything and there is a parent’s evening coming up soon anyway.

I also have an extremely anxious dog who really stresses out if stranger’s come into the home (constantly barking, pacing up and down, sometimes wee’s - something we are working on but he came from a bad home previous to us).

WIBU to tell them I don’t need a home visit and this just isn’t going to work for me or will it be seen as bad and negative thing like I’m not co-operating or I’m being resistant etc?

And yes… I do tend to overthink everything which is why I’m asking!

Picture this, there is a child somewhere getting abused or living in an unsafe environment, if a 15 min teacher home visit might help spot something like that and possibly save a child’s life then they can inconvenience me all they like

Tbh, I think what is actually weird is that in your 20 years of education you have never even heard of this. As evidenced by this thread, it isn't remotely unusual.

That’s literally exactly what I said!!!

Our schools in our county and the county Im from ( both U.K.) don't do home visits like this

I agree with another PP , safeguarding is for where there are concerns , not where there are no concerns just to intrude on people's right to privacy and personal life (Art8 HRA)

I'd offer an MS teams 5 min call (same as us parents get for parents evenings 😆) say hi and show them child's bedroom by moving laptop around, then "rightio, I've a meeting in 2 mins so I have to go now"

Other than that postpone the meeting to when you aren't short or time at work due to medical appointments before your upcoming surgery.

Bc OP you don't want "refusal of home visit" on your DS's school records

It gets misread later if anything happens - so you are better off postponing it til
After your op or doing it over MS teams

Why would someone from a school need to see the bedroom? Do these people doing these visits have safeguarding qualifications? Surely if it’s a teacher, they should be in school teaching?

They don't ask to see the bedrooms!

What research? Seems like most view them as ‘invasion of privacy’, or an ‘inconvenience’.

Offer a zoom or Teams call, explain about the dog being unwelcoming to strangers or some other reason.

Where you live. It isn’t remotely unusual, where YOU live. Quite unusual where people who don’t have home visits live.

Home visits clearly aren't universal and even where they are most are saying it happens before the child starts school - not after with the child not there.

I don't think this is normal - and hopefully the OP spoken to the school and sorted something out - either a shorter visit - an hour seems excessive - or a later date of skipped it entirely - and if like OP says it's been offered to all parents of new starters I don't think she'd be the only one.

I’m sorry, I don’t understand your reply. It is very unusual where I live… to the point where I have never heard of it despite working in education for 20 years.

Or were you replying to @Johnnysgirl?

I agree with you.
Most kids would want to show off their home.

Refusal might mean something to hide.
No furniture
Hoarding mess
Other issues where children were being isolated from a normal life with family and friends visiting.

This has been normal since my ds17 started school and all of mine have had them in London boroughs and then in our new area. It wouldn't cross my mind to refuse it just helps to build relationships and isnt intrusive at all. It's not an inspection.
I don't think anyone in our classes refused and I've never heard of anyone else saying no either, it's just not big deal for 30 mins. I don't understand the drama tbh just tick the box and move on.

We didn’t have this at DT’s school - central London. It’s not a practical idea as parents are at work so not at home to see teachers or whoever they send. If it was important it would be throughout the country rather than random areas.

Why do so many people think it's acceptable for someone to come round your house and check up on you when there is no reason to believe you have done anything wrong? .

There might be causes for concern around the OP's situation. I'm not going to go into that because I don't know and it seems to be in hand as I have said to other enthusiastic posters

Everyone on this thread who had a home visit, had it before the child started school and with the child present.

What the OP describes is very unusual. I've also never come across it in many years in education.

Im stunned that someone has the time. Especially knowing how difficult it can be to get help for a child with a genuine issue.

Isn’t this for social services? If the school has concerns they contact social services who are trained and legally are supported to negotiate home visits. The argument people on here are using, mentioning possibly serious home environment issues is way above the level of responsibility and training of school employees. I was a teacher and also parent governor there is no way the school would make home visits if concerned. Strictly passed on to relevant professionals. So it still begs the argument of why a school would home visit. It sounds like a contentious issue with some schools doing and others not.

Hadtochangetothisone my goodness you shout a lot! The OP is not talking about a visit on basis of suspected abuse / maltreatment etc etc. This is a simple school visit on basis of child being registered there. Apparently before child has started or anyway early days. Any major issues unlikely to be picked up this early and also school is not the right profession educators have only a reduced training in assessment of home conditions. Imagine concern being picked up because the home is a bit disordered and this taken too far!!

I think you're overthinking this and if you refuse it will look odd.

Why would it look odd? People could have many reasons as to why this visit wasn’t practical. I would refuse as DH and I are at work all day - hardly odd. Teachers should be in school teaching and not making random visits

Totally normal here.

I know you will rearrange the visit, but your son not being there isn't necessarily the point of the visit. They also want to see the environment he lives in, as this can affect kids in school.

My kids are older and it didn't happen in their school at that time, but my niece is 9 and they did a school visit when she started school.

I was at my sister's house when they did it, along with my other sister. Dsis made them tea/coffee. They were very nice and friendly, said they could see my niece had a close extended family as they were leaving.

Well said