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Original poster

Kids aside, if you could go back in time would you still marry your husband/wife?

233 replies

TrialsAndTribulationss · 05/10/2022 20:00

Just interested if anyone else would choose not to or if I’m on my own with this one? Will stick with him for this lifetime though

OP posts:
Deadringer · 05/10/2022 21:03

No. I am a bit sick of him tbh.

Hesleepswiththefishes · 05/10/2022 21:04

Absolutely, we had 6 years together before kids so really cemented things and have complete devotion to each other 24 years later almost complete opposites in everything apart from morals and ethics and we make each other belly laugh every day, he has been my rock through so very hard times and I love him so much

AuntSalli · 05/10/2022 21:06

No.

bakewellbride · 05/10/2022 21:08

Yes, I adore him.

Myhusbandsnores · 05/10/2022 21:08

Nope. We’ve be been together 21 years now but I wish I’d had a higher bar, more time on my own and more confidence when I was younger.

But I have 2 children who are fabulous human beings and have inherited the best parts of both of us, so they make everything worthwhile.

DeadButDelicious · 05/10/2022 21:08

In a heartbeat. We've been together for 18 years and married for 16.

I wouldn't however have 'the wedding' again. I would stick a nice dress on, grab a couple of witnesses and sneak down the registry office and just get married. No muss no fuss. I had a nice wedding, don't get me wrong but other people tried to make it about them and their needs and with the benefit of a now 40 year old mind I'd say 'fuck this' and just get married and deal with the fall out later.

PrincessSpanky · 05/10/2022 21:09

Would def marry him all over again. Been together almost 19 years and married 16y+.

Everyone has faults, but he still makes my heart flutter and has never ever been abusive. We have our wee squabbles, but never have huge fights.

We get along really well, even though we threw 2 kids into the mix.

RiftGibbon · 05/10/2022 21:10

Yes, absolutely.

Soscrewed · 05/10/2022 21:10

Absolutely yes. I feel very lucky to have found him. Would probably marry him sooner given the chance, been together 20 years, but only married 9.

RoachTheHorse · 05/10/2022 21:11

Yes. Absolutely.

ThisShitsBananas · 05/10/2022 21:11

Yes I love him so much.

NoWordForFluffy · 05/10/2022 21:13

Muchtoomuchtodo · 05/10/2022 20:29

I’d marry the man that I met, but not the man that he’s grown in to.

This is me too.

Pickledcurlywurly · 05/10/2022 21:15

Yes, I'd still marry him.

But there was also a relationship that never was about 18 months before I met DH. I wasn't honest with them about how I felt and I always wonder to myself what would have happened if I had.

Badger1970 · 05/10/2022 21:18

If I'd had a vision of the grumpy self absorbed miserable old bastard that he's grown in to at 58, I'd have fucking run for the hills and never stopped.

Jackienory · 05/10/2022 21:21

Yes, absolutely - never regretted it.

CatchYouOnTheFlippetyFlop · 05/10/2022 21:23

100% yes. Would not want to be with anybody else. After 20 years together, we still laugh every day.

Went through one rough patch a decade ago, but rode the wave and so glad.

We barely argue or bicker. Household is very happy with 1 teenage dd and he is honestly the funniest person I know. We laugh every single day, even if it's just us skitting each other.

I love him so so much.

I know he would say the same too.

He makes me feel like he really loves me. And I hope I make home feel the same way.

crazycadetmum · 05/10/2022 21:24

I would echo some of these..I would marry the man i met..not sure im keen on the man he is now!

AnotherEmma · 05/10/2022 21:24

No. I hadn't realised the full extent to which his family was dysfunctional and the damage it had done to him. After we got married, and particularly after I got pregnant with our first child, they caused us a lot of stress and heartbreak. Unfortunately coparenting with
him is really hard work, and I think that's in large part due to his own upbringing. Knowing what I know now, if I was starting over, I would prioritise finding a life partner who is emotionally healthy and comes from a reasonably emotionally stable family (I know no family is perfect, but his is very very far from perfect!)

Greengagesnfennel · 05/10/2022 21:25

Yes. Every time.

Had no idea what I was doing and went on heart & instinct.
But 23yrs later, it was a very good instinct.

neverbeenskiing · 05/10/2022 21:25

Yes. We've been together 18 years and have had our ups and downs, like any couple, but whatever is going on in our lives he always puts me first. When we met I was young, thin and beautiful (not that I realised it at the time!) and now I'm older, fatter, have a disability and bags under my eyes from a DC with SEN who doesn't sleep...sometimes I look in the mirror and don't recognise myself but I know that DH loves me for me. He's the best person I know.

ImEasyLikeSundayMorning · 05/10/2022 21:26

100%

DarkShade · 05/10/2022 21:26

Definitely not. I was way too young to decide and didn't know what I was doing. We have both changed. It should have been a very good 6 year relationship, instead of a bad 15 and counting year one.There are days where the enormity of this mistake weighs on me so heavily that I find it hard to focus on anything.

I will stay though, he is a good dad and essentially a good person.

70billionthnamechange · 05/10/2022 21:27

Yep

keeprunning55 · 05/10/2022 21:28

Sadly, It don’t think I would. He had an affair & I don’t trust a soul now. Stayed with him because i couldn’t bare the idea of breaking up our family. It was years ago now and I’ve never been the same.

User435787532 · 05/10/2022 21:28

On balance yes. Together 20 years, married 10. I was besotted with him in the early days and he is still the love of my life… but I often feel let down, he can be very negative and distant, he’s also obsessed with conspiracy theories since COVID which is draining. He’s lost the adventure and spirit I fell in love with, I guess that’s both our fault. I still love him immensely and he’s the best dad, however, it’s certainly hard work and a commitment.