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AIBU?

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Original poster

To question my DH about the bizarre items ive found?

449 replies

NameChangeHoney · 03/10/2022 12:06

I've been away for work, I have come back to find items that certainly aren't mine, some quite bizarre things. A top, pink nail clippers, womens razor, small makeup pallete, all things that don't belong to me. My DD had also said to me on face time when I was away that DH was talking to a lady in the shower on the phone (she is only 5) so I didn't question her I just left it.
He also keeps checking my phone when I'm not in the room which is adding to my suspicion as that isnt normal behaviour for him.
I feel a bit silly really, it's a few random items but I know they do not belong to me and i feel like hes being weird. I'm not sure now if I'm over thinking or if I should genuinely ask him who the fuck the pink nail clippers belong to 😳😂AIBU to ask or am I being a twat? How do I go forward with this? Any help greatly appreciated.

OP posts:
FiveShelties · 03/10/2022 12:08

Just ask him.

Aggypanthus · 03/10/2022 12:08

Of course you should ask him ! Why haven't you already or are you afraid of the answer ?

TealTeacup · 03/10/2022 12:09

If you know they don't belong to your daughter surely you should know this isn't normal?

My friend found out her boyfriend was cheating from a strip lash found in the bed. She doesn't wear false lashes.

Catslovepies · 03/10/2022 12:09

Could he be cross dressing?

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 03/10/2022 12:10

You seem quite nonchalant for someone who's husband is probably cheating on her

yougotthelook · 03/10/2022 12:10

NameChangeHoney · 03/10/2022 12:06

I've been away for work, I have come back to find items that certainly aren't mine, some quite bizarre things. A top, pink nail clippers, womens razor, small makeup pallete, all things that don't belong to me. My DD had also said to me on face time when I was away that DH was talking to a lady in the shower on the phone (she is only 5) so I didn't question her I just left it.
He also keeps checking my phone when I'm not in the room which is adding to my suspicion as that isnt normal behaviour for him.
I feel a bit silly really, it's a few random items but I know they do not belong to me and i feel like hes being weird. I'm not sure now if I'm over thinking or if I should genuinely ask him who the fuck the pink nail clippers belong to 😳😂AIBU to ask or am I being a twat? How do I go forward with this? Any help greatly appreciated.

Oh god! Just ask him 😳
I really hope there is a simple explanation xxxx

GretaGip · 03/10/2022 12:11

It's very concerning that you potentially consider yourself tear by asking about these very abnormal happenings.

Are you scared of your DH?

Hillrunning · 03/10/2022 12:11

We're all the items together? Random thing turn up in our house but in singles over time. Multiple unclaimed items is especially suspicious.

GretaGip · 03/10/2022 12:11

Tear = twat

Echobelly · 03/10/2022 12:12

'Do you know where these things came from? They're not mine' I think is a good opener, you're not accusing him of anything but his reaction should give you a clue.

Babyg1995 · 03/10/2022 12:13

Ask him he will probably just lie to you though time to do some digging

Imissmoominmama · 03/10/2022 12:13

Talking to a lady in the shower? FaceTiming?

He’s either experimenting with cross dressing, or he’s having an affair.

He’s also scared that someone is going to tell you- which is why he’s checking your phone.

Ask him. Show him the items and ask!!

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 03/10/2022 12:14

If he's checking your phone, maybe he thought you'd cheated while away...which would likely be the train of thought for someone who'd cheated while their wife was away

TooMuchToDoTooLittleInclination · 03/10/2022 12:16

I'd pack him a bag, leave it in the doorstep with the bag of random shit that's not yours & a note to hope she makes him happy!

there's NO explanation that would make me want to stay married to him. NONE.

TheLadyofShalott1 · 03/10/2022 12:17

If they are not yours or your DD, how can there be anything but a dodgy reason for them - unless you and your DH like playing stupid "jokes" like this on each other? I am finding it really difficult to understand why your DH left them laying around, or why you are hesitating about asking him about them - unless you want to get the proverbial ducks lining up in a nice straight row first?

LT2 · 03/10/2022 12:18

As a PP said, you do seem very relaxed given the potential situation that is happening here. I would be in bits if I found those items when the only other female in the house is 5!

lunar1 · 03/10/2022 12:20

There was a time when I'd have said to just ask him. More cynical me would find out what I could without letting on that I suspected anything. He doesn't have those items for any good reason so I wouldn't give him chance to cover his tracks and gaslight you.

MadeForThis · 03/10/2022 12:21

Check his phone

Heyisforhorses · 03/10/2022 12:22

You're very nonchalant for someone who has found womens items in her house. Affair or cross dressing both of which would warrant a slightly more stressed out post.

britneyisfree · 03/10/2022 12:22

Seems like she left them there for you to find.

Pinkdelight3 · 03/10/2022 12:22

How on earth can you think you're being a twat to ask about this? Honestly, the self-doubts that women go through are astonishing. Trust your gut and do not be fobbed off.

SiobhanSharpe · 03/10/2022 12:23

You found four items left behind when you from a trip away items that would seem to belong to a woman and you didn't immediately say 'who does this stuff belong to? It's not mine.'
i can't even begin to fathom this. Reported.

Dancingjane · 03/10/2022 12:24

Why havn’t you just asked him before now.

Pollydon · 03/10/2022 12:24

Firstly get your head out of the sand. I used to work away regularly, I never came home to find another woman's belongings in my house.
Does he know you've found them ?

SallyWD · 03/10/2022 12:24

I'm very laid back and not a suspicious person but I'd be very concerned by this. My first conclusion would be that DH had invited a woman over (someone who'd stayed the night from the looks of it), I then might consider him being a cross dresser.

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