Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To question my DH about the bizarre items ive found?

449 replies

NameChangeHoney · 03/10/2022 12:06

I've been away for work, I have come back to find items that certainly aren't mine, some quite bizarre things. A top, pink nail clippers, womens razor, small makeup pallete, all things that don't belong to me. My DD had also said to me on face time when I was away that DH was talking to a lady in the shower on the phone (she is only 5) so I didn't question her I just left it.
He also keeps checking my phone when I'm not in the room which is adding to my suspicion as that isnt normal behaviour for him.
I feel a bit silly really, it's a few random items but I know they do not belong to me and i feel like hes being weird. I'm not sure now if I'm over thinking or if I should genuinely ask him who the fuck the pink nail clippers belong to 😳😂AIBU to ask or am I being a twat? How do I go forward with this? Any help greatly appreciated.

OP posts:
Cheminaufaules · 03/10/2022 13:01

TooMuchToDoTooLittleInclination · 03/10/2022 13:01

Why? Have you left one behind somewhere??

Show quote history

😂

TooMuchToDoTooLittleInclination · 03/10/2022 13:02

Tootels · 03/10/2022 13:00

Do people leave nail clippers around 5 year olds?

Random.

TheUsualChaos · 03/10/2022 13:02

You need to start thinking about what this means for your marriage as it's sounding very much like he had another woman stay over while your children were still in the house. Which is pretty awful if he is not only cheating but also not being particularly careful about what your children can overhear.

If it was innocent like a friend visiting or needing somewhere to stay the night then he would have told you about it surely.

Is he protective over his phone?
Checking your phone shows how paranoid he is getting because of his own behaviour imo.

Probably need to just get the items together and with no warning just ask him what they are and see how he reacts. He may already have made up a cover story just in case though.

Herejustforthisone · 03/10/2022 13:02

LadyHarmby · 03/10/2022 12:45

I think he’s cross-dressing. No one brings a razor and nail clippers to an illicit liasion.

Unless they want the wife to find out and to force the hand of the man.

theydontspeakforus · 03/10/2022 13:03

If this is real, then he has had another woman in your house.

Original poster
NameChangeHoney · 03/10/2022 13:03

The top was in my drawers, it was the first thing I found. It has a very distinct picture on the front that i do not recognise, also not my size, not my taste.
The razor and nail clippers were in the ensuite, left inside the shower on a shelf (I don't regularly use that bathroom I just do my makeup in there and use the other bathrooms). The palette was on top of the drawers where I keep my perfumes, and a few little sentimental things the kids have got me.
I know its gross, the razor was used, DH definitely has not used it!
My other child is almost 2.
I was away for a week.

If he is having an affair it would have been much easier had lashes or underwear or anything but fucking nail clippers been left behind. Euuggghhh.

OP posts:
hannsmum · 03/10/2022 13:03

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 03/10/2022 12:10

You seem quite nonchalant for someone who's husband is probably cheating on her

Yes my very thought 😌

altmember · 03/10/2022 13:03

LadyHarmby · 03/10/2022 12:45

I think he’s cross-dressing. No one brings a razor and nail clippers to an illicit liasion.

That was my first thought too - the other woman is pretty unlikely to bring razor and nail clippers unless she was staying for days. But equally why would a bloke need to buy himself pink nail clippers for cross dressing, assuming he's already got some in another colour??

Did you take the only pair of nail clippers in the house away with you and he went out and bought another pair? Maybe pink ones were all that was left in the shop, or maybe he bought them for your dd, to encourage her to have her nails clipped? Maybe the makeup was for your dd too?

The razor could be his, not necessarily an indicator of cross dressing. Can't think of any explanation for the pink top though.

maddy68 · 03/10/2022 13:04

Herejustforthisone · 03/10/2022 13:02

Unless they want the wife to find out and to force the hand of the man.

Show quote history

This ...

Someone having an affair would have preened before they got there.

Did he have a sneaky baby sitter before a lads night out that you don't know about?

Or he might be dabbling with wearing women's clothes.

Cheminaufaules · 03/10/2022 13:04

The items sound like sacrificial items - in the sense that the person doesn't mind giving away I mean, not as in a religious ritual. They've been planted. Doesn't your DH do any tidying or cleaning @NameChangeHoney ?

maddy68 · 03/10/2022 13:04

Would the top fit your husband?

BowiesJumper · 03/10/2022 13:05

Have your bed sheets been changed whilst you were away? 👀

Minfilia · 03/10/2022 13:05

This can’t be real surely.

HairyKnobsAndBroomsticks · 03/10/2022 13:05

The cynic in me is awaiting a deletion message.

MrsMoastyToasty · 03/10/2022 13:06

It sounds like an OW "marking her territory " . I bet she has placed them there AND threatened to tell you herself if he won't. Hence the shifty behaviour with the phone.

MarigoldMoonStone · 03/10/2022 13:06

If he is having an affair then whoever it is clearly wants him to get caught!!

girlmom21 · 03/10/2022 13:06

This is absolutely a woman wanting to be caught.

MadeForThis · 03/10/2022 13:07

What size is the top?

Original poster
NameChangeHoney · 03/10/2022 13:07

TooMuchToDoTooLittleInclination · 03/10/2022 13:01

Why? Have you left one behind somewhere??

Show quote history

Considering my shitty circumstances right now that made me burst out laughing!

OP posts:
Cheminaufaules · 03/10/2022 13:07

Ok so what's the picture on the top?

TheUsualChaos · 03/10/2022 13:07

LadyHarmby · 03/10/2022 12:45

I think he’s cross-dressing. No one brings a razor and nail clippers to an illicit liasion.

Unless this is far from the first time and they are starting to get careless. Maybe they were just things she keeps in a wash bag that she brings.

AlexandraJJ · 03/10/2022 13:08

My first thought was cross dressing too. I’d be looking at his arms, chest and legs to see if they are bare before I said anything. The call to the woman in the shower might have been for advice?? Only way to know is to ask him 😬

ChocHotolate · 03/10/2022 13:08

How long were you away for? Could he have moved someone on for a few days? That might explain the randomness of the objects

middleofthelittle · 03/10/2022 13:08

girlmom21 · 03/10/2022 13:06

This is absolutely a woman wanting to be caught.

Agree. She knows he is married and has children and has done this on purpose so you find out.

He also didn't have to meet people in person to find someone initially, the internet has 100 ways.

Sorry OP but I wouldn't let him back in the house when he finishes work and advise him to a book a hotel.

cooolio · 03/10/2022 13:08

He's had her there while you've been away and your 5 year old overheard her talking in the bathroom. That's horrible.

She wants you to find these things and she's told him if he doesn't tell you about her then she will. That's why he keeps checking your phone, he's hoping to intercept her message.