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AIBU?

To not want this woman on my street "helping" with my bins every week?

227 replies

LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 13:38

A woman on my street (about 5 doors away - don't know her name, she doesn't even say hello if she sees me) rushes out to put all the neighbours' bins back after the binmen have been. (Not sure how many other houses she does but it's not just mine.) I don't like it because she goes into my drive to do it and she can see into my house through the window. It just feels unnecessary and intrusive. I'm guessing she wants to be helpful and clear the pavement for others and thinks we are all to slow putting them back. Would it be ungracious to pop out and tell her thanks but there's no need?

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cushioncovers · 29/09/2022 13:55

My elderly retired neighbour does exactly the same and then gets the hump if I don't tap on the door to say thanks every week. It also gives him an excuse to come into my property and have a look at any work I've been doing in the garden. He's bored and nosey. I only tolerate it because I work full time and he is the local neighbourhood watch person who looks out for any suspicious activity. 😁

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Whyishedoingthat · 29/09/2022 13:56

Our binmen leave the bloody things all over the place. It makes things really difficult for people with pushchairs/wheelchairs/mobility scooters to safely use the footpath. Maybe that’s her reasoning.

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readsalotgirl63 · 29/09/2022 13:56

For those who move bins for elderly neighbours would you continue to do so if they asked you not to ?

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ErrolTheDragon · 29/09/2022 13:57

Are the bins blocking the road or pavement when they're out? If they are, then the sooner they're back in the better. Bins on pavements can be a significant inconvenience or even danger to people with various types of disability, people pushing prams etc.

You can ask her not to if you want, OP, but tbh seems a bit churlish.

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Suzi888 · 29/09/2022 13:58

OMG please send this lady to me. Of all the things to complain about.

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Underanothersky · 29/09/2022 13:59

As a wheelchair user I think this is brilliant.

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LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:00

If the postman can't see in how can your neighbour see in?

The front door is not right next to the bay window. The bins are. The postman walks up the path to my door and back out so doesn't walk right past the window. He could probably see me as well on his way up, but at least he's there to do a job. I'm not complaining about tradesmen going into my house, either. But I would if a neighbor let themselves in!

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Sciurus83 · 29/09/2022 14:00

I love our bin fairy, what a non issue to be bothered by.

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LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:02

i always do this for my neighbour as they are elderly never considered it would be classified as a CRIME!!!

I didn't know it was a CRIME either!!!

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Alphabet1spaghetti2 · 29/09/2022 14:02

Would love it if someone did that here. Instead bins are left out from
collection to collection, which shoves pedestrians and those with wheelchairs/pushchairs out into the cycle lane or road. Then there is the teenagers who love to just throw the bins around - empty or filled.
But no one can as these are terraced house with locked passage ways.
yabvvvvvvvvvvu.

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TheYearOfSmallThings · 29/09/2022 14:02

Certainly YANBU to ask her not to do it if you prefer.

But I am very glad we do this for each other on my road. The bin men leave them on the path and they would absolutely be kicked over by schoolkids or swapped with broken manky bins if they were left there from 8:30 to 6pm when people get home from work.

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LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:03

As a wheelchair user I think this is brilliant.

This is the reason I should probably just leave her to it.

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Muu · 29/09/2022 14:03

Just ask her not to.

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IlonaRN · 29/09/2022 14:04

If the bin men leave them on the pavement so they create a problem for pedestrians, perhaps suggest that she only moves it to just inside your boundary instead? She should be able to do this without going on to your property herself.

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northernlola · 29/09/2022 14:06

This is a very timely thread for me, as I have a similar neighbour and I've always found it quite helpful. But today I happened to be home, so brought my own bin up the drive, as far as it would go close to the house. Then got in my car to head off somewhere. She still came!! She didn't know I was there. Walked up my drive towards my bin. Why would she do that when it was already in!?

So I waved breezily from the car. She said oh you've already got it in. Yes, so why are you right up at my window!?

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DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 29/09/2022 14:06

If you put them away yourself for several weeks, it would break the habit without having to say anything at all and I think it would be the easiest course of action.
You might meet her mid operation which gives you the chance to smile brightly and say Thank you but I really want to do this for myself, I can't bear not to be independent. which would be easier than seeking her out. And when she says no trouble etc you can double down.
She's included you as part of her "round" and probably thinks it is a neighbourly service, but once its ingrained in her round as a habit - its harder to get her to stop as she might fear she's offending you if she stops doing it.

Could you draw that portion of curtain on a day when you can't do it?

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Lullabies2Paralyze · 29/09/2022 14:08

Next time you see her doing it just say thanks but can you leave my bin and I’ll sort it unless I ask you to put it away (ie you’re on holiday). She probably thinks everyone is out and work and doesn’t want them blowing around in wind/cluttering the road.

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WhatAmIDoingWrong123 · 29/09/2022 14:08

AdobeWanKenobi · 29/09/2022 13:49

I don't like it because she goes into my drive to do it and she can see into my house through the window.

What does the postman do? Couriers? etc Surely they can see in too? What are you doing in there? Sacrificing goats?
YABU.

You’ve not half made me laugh with this comment 🤣😆

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LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:09

Could you draw that portion of curtain on a day when you can't do it?

I'm SAHM so I'm pretty much around all the time! I'd do it myself given half a chance.

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Ihatemyroad · 29/09/2022 14:10

Can’t you catch her one day, introduce yourself and say thank you and then mention there’s no need to do your bin in future but she’s been so kind doing it up until now?

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LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:11

Next time you see her doing it just say thanks but can you leave my bin and I’ll sort it unless I ask you to put it away (ie you’re on holiday).

I've never spoken to her. I said hi once, walking past her house but she just stared at me like "who are you?".

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FuckYourNuggets · 29/09/2022 14:11

LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:03

As a wheelchair user I think this is brilliant.

This is the reason I should probably just leave her to it.

How lucky you are that this didn't even occur to you, when you were judging someone more thoughtful who is making life easier for people with disabilities Hmm Here's an idea, if you're home, take your own fucking bin in!

The other week, I made it halfway to the shop and had to come back (with a fucking parcel on my lap) as the bins were blocking my path and I couldn't even get to a dropped curb. (And yes I complain every two weeks about this, nothing gets done)

PLEASE take your bins in when you can.

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LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit · 29/09/2022 14:12

Can’t you catch her one day, introduce yourself and say thank you

She doesn't seem very friendly. I don't feel like I should have to go and introduce myself to people coming onto my property.

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MimosaSunrise · 29/09/2022 14:12

I’d find this a bit odd. One thing doing it for elderly neighbours or when everyone does each other little favours, but I don’t think I’d like a neighbour I don’t even know being out there first bringing in all the bins. I’d be wondering if it was a criticism, nosiness or if they were the kind of manipulative person who does stuff like this so they put themselves beyond criticism. I’ve met loads of controlling people like this, unfortunately, and can well believe the garden annexation!

Our bin men don’t leave the bins in the middle of the pavement so that wouldn’t be a factor here, though.

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DogsDryWineAndCheese · 29/09/2022 14:14

This is very normal and very nice where I’m from.
I really can’t imagine finding a problem with it.
Obviously you’re well within your rights to ask her to keep her dirty mitts off your bin but I think it’s all a bit precious. Just don’t stand in the window naked on bin day if that’s the only problem!

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