I feel like I should be in the prime of my life with my DH and beautiful three kids, big job, nice house in lovely place, oldest DC starting at lovely private secondary...all the big jigsaw pieces in place.
But in reality, I feel like I have little to no choice left in my life:
I don't really enjoy my job, I kind of fell into my industry years ago as a grad. But I am our primary earner as DH has had employment issues due to mental health so I am stuck.
I don't really enjoy my weekends because they are full of chores. DH does some chores but I do all the cooking, laundry, cleaning and most of the shopping. I also do a massive proportion of weekend childcare because he typically chooses not to come out with us. He has yet to take all 3 DC anywhere, youngest is 2 and a half...he doesn't feel he would cope.
I don't really enjoy holidays because we live away from both our families so most of our hols are spent visiting grandparents and other relatives. Obviously if we were really close with these people, we wouldn't have moved away.
Basically, I feel like our life looks perfect as long as I keep on keeping on with a smile plastered on my face . But almost all the time, I'm basically faking it.
Is it normal to feel trapped like this in midlife?