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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let 13 year old dress like a drug dealer??

320 replies

Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:19

DS is 13 and suddenly has taken an interest in ‘fashion’ which mostly seems to be dressing in all black sports logos and puffa
jackets. Nike trainers, puma joggers, north face hoody - you get the idea.

oh, and calling us ‘fam’ every frigging minute,
innit bruv.

given that he’s a white, MC kid, in a MC area at a MC school ( state but uniform with tie/blazer/shirt etc) with all that comes with that, I think it’s annoying/amusing and that he’ll grow out of this fake ‘street’ phase.

DH on the other hand thinks that he’s dressing. like a drug dealer and we should go buy him some Boden or something.

AIBU to just let 13 year old to dress how he likes??

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
viques · 21/09/2022 20:35

Bunce1 · 21/09/2022 20:23

we have the same child.

we went out I said wear something halfway nice-

grey Nike joggers
black north face top
nike tech fleece
black/grey Nike dunks

I draw the line at the bum bag worn across the middle.

He is top set everything and head of his year. He’s a peer mentor for one of the y6 feeder schools. He looks like a bit of a thug.

I blame top boy. Say less.

Slow handclap for the sneakiest parental boast this week!

fiftytontheresa · 21/09/2022 20:35

Don't all teen boys dress and talk like that? All the ones I know do anyway.
I find it quite amusing.

And at least the look seems to go hand in hand with good hygiene, even if I do sometimes worry I'll end up suffocating through inhaling too much Lynx and Sauvage Grin

Original poster
Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:36

‘and you think there are no middle class drug dealers ?’

to clarify - I DON’T think he looks like a dealer, But he does look like your classic county lines/ mugger estate kid. DP does.
I was an estate kid so know the look well.
i am aware that drug dealing can and does transcend class/incomes…

OP posts:
JessesMum777888 · 21/09/2022 20:36

There are plenty of pasty white boys dealing drugs where I am trust me !

Vieve1325 · 21/09/2022 20:36

My mum felt the very same when I slouched about the streets with my tracksuit bottoms tucked into my socks, sporting a Fred Perry jumper, hoop earrings, sovereign rings and enough eyeliner to pass as a panda back in 2006….

But it’s a forgotten time now I am a worthy member of society with a niace respectful career these days. She often trots out to her pals with teenagers that I was a rotter who turned out fine ;)

Leave him to it. I agree it looks terrible but teenagers innit?

itsgettingweird · 21/09/2022 20:36

🤣🤣🤣

My ds is now 18.

At that age I'd often offer to buy him branded stuff wanting him to know he could have logos etc if it meant fitting in, following trends, feeling included or whatever (he's autistic so I've always been very aware of helping him in social circles)

His response was always only drug dealers dress like that.

I never worked it out because he lived in next straight legged joggers, next t shirts and hoodies brought at various swim events.

From the little information he gave me it was definitely something to do with the branding! 🤷‍♀️

SeriousChild · 21/09/2022 20:37

The funny thing is the actual "street" kids don't dress like this anymore. Our PRU kids moved on about 2 years ago, they wouldn't be seen dead dressed like the middle classes who think they're copying them 😆

WagathaChristieMystery · 21/09/2022 20:38

Buy him some Boden? 🤣🤣 I promise OP, it’s just a phase and it’ll pass.

bellac11 · 21/09/2022 20:38

I find it embarrassing. Children in Italy and Spain dont look like this or emulate that sort of lifestyle. Well not where our family live anyway.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/09/2022 20:39

It is a bit cringe. But yes let him do his thing.

paisley256 · 21/09/2022 20:39

😂at the Boden mini man bag!

JelloFishy · 21/09/2022 20:39

Does he have a man bag? It's part of the uniform to carry a teeny tiny bag!

What do they keep in them?

QueenWenceslas · 21/09/2022 20:39

It’s just a phase. I used to dress in Kappa tracksuits and Nike air max a la Vicky Pollard when I was a teenager, my mother used to despair.
I’m now in my thirties look back and cringe at photos of my younger self.
This too shall pass.

RortyDogOfTheRemove · 21/09/2022 20:40

Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:19

DS is 13 and suddenly has taken an interest in ‘fashion’ which mostly seems to be dressing in all black sports logos and puffa
jackets. Nike trainers, puma joggers, north face hoody - you get the idea.

oh, and calling us ‘fam’ every frigging minute,
innit bruv.

given that he’s a white, MC kid, in a MC area at a MC school ( state but uniform with tie/blazer/shirt etc) with all that comes with that, I think it’s annoying/amusing and that he’ll grow out of this fake ‘street’ phase.

DH on the other hand thinks that he’s dressing. like a drug dealer and we should go buy him some Boden or something.

AIBU to just let 13 year old to dress how he likes??

YANBU, OP.

My youngest child went through a drug deelah phase (which we now call her Chav Phase). She would dress from head to toe in Adidas/North Face/Nike and adopted the local accent for about five minutes (when she was actually a girl who had been brought up on Boden and had been at an independent girls' school since she was 4).

She grew out of it and is now a nice adult who laughs at her teenage self.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/09/2022 20:41

The funny thing is the actual "street" kids don't dress like this anymore. Our PRU kids moved on about 2 years ago, they wouldn't be seen dead dressed like the middle classes who think they're copying them

I’m sure you’re right. And isn’t “street” now “Road” (not that I know anything!)?

Original poster
Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:41

I do find it a bit bizarre but seems like it’s just a teen thing… DP seems to have forgotten the god awful fashion we lived back in the day. Thanks mandem for the advice. Believe.

OP posts:
LadyMonicaBaddingham · 21/09/2022 20:41

Men have heard of Boden? Unless your DH is actually Johnnie Boden, I call BS

RortyDogOfTheRemove · 21/09/2022 20:42

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 21/09/2022 20:41

Men have heard of Boden? Unless your DH is actually Johnnie Boden, I call BS

Boden is about the only clothes label that my erstwhile husband would have been able to identify. 😬

properdoughnut · 21/09/2022 20:42

Is he a drug dealer?

MarshaBradyo · 21/09/2022 20:42

Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:33

‘What's being white got to do with it?’

oh, only that he’s doing that fake Jamaican slang thing that seems particularly out of place given he’s a pasty white boy decidedly NOT from any ‘hood.
ironically both DP and I ARE from the hood but my mum would have slap the legs off me for speaking and dressing g the way he does instead of speaking properly…

That would probably annoy me more than the clothes

LosttheremoteAGAIN · 21/09/2022 20:42

My son is just like that

hes 22-coming up to 23

he still dresses and talks like that-I just let it roll off me

he might grow up at some point…

Loics · 21/09/2022 20:42

bellac11 · 21/09/2022 20:38

I find it embarrassing. Children in Italy and Spain dont look like this or emulate that sort of lifestyle. Well not where our family live anyway.

Oh unfortunately a lot of Spanish teenagers do!

Original poster
Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:43

‘Does he have a man bag? It's part of the uniform to carry a teeny tiny bag!’

yes! Despite having 50 pockets in all his layers. It’s Eastpak, or maybe Adidas… but it’s black.
maybe all the Roadmen carry them…

OP posts:
IsABajan · 21/09/2022 20:44

Bunce1 · 21/09/2022 20:23

we have the same child.

we went out I said wear something halfway nice-

grey Nike joggers
black north face top
nike tech fleece
black/grey Nike dunks

I draw the line at the bum bag worn across the middle.

He is top set everything and head of his year. He’s a peer mentor for one of the y6 feeder schools. He looks like a bit of a thug.

I blame top boy. Say less.

🤣🤣🤣 at Say less.
My son says that when I tell him to tidy his room 🤦🏽‍♀️

Original poster
Textboxmm · 21/09/2022 20:44

‘Is he a drug dealer?’
christ, if only he were that useful.

OP posts: