To think they should sack her?

[Yellowdove]

Colleague in work seems to lie a lot about her home/ family life that are easily proven to be untrue. However, she is really good at her job and has never lied about a work related issue (as far as we know). My point is how can we trust her if she lies about such pointless stuff in such a compulsive way?! HR seems to be saying as a it isn’t a work issue there’s nothing we can do. But how is it not a work issue?

I was thinking along those lines as well.

@Yellowdove give it a break, yours the one likely to be sacked. You're obsessed and quite honestly the "coincidences regarding HR and childminder" are bizarre to say the least.

It's a good thing your job doesn't rely on being able to mind your own business, otherwise your jacket would be hingin' on a very shoogly peg, OP.

@BluebellsareBlue I hope I'm not overstepping by answering for that poster, but I read that post and assumed that the poster has a deceased child. So, counts all 4 when it matters, but does not want to have discussions about the bereavement over the water cooler.

What would they sack her for? It's odd behaviour, yes, but not a sackable offence. Don't think it would stand up at a tribunal.

Go to work and do your job…

Stop being so over invested in your colleague, your behaviour is creepy and leaning towards stalking tendencies

I can accept that I’ve been unreasonable in wanting her gone now. I still believe eventually as other people have said she’ll start to cause problems in work. A liar can’t help themselves. It’s a shame it can’t be dealt with before it gets to that point but I accept it. I feel fiercely protective of our clients. But I accept there’s nothing I can do.

I would be very concerned about why she needs to lie. That's really quite sad.

But I wouldn't be worried about sensitive data because there is no evidence she would lie about that.

It sounds a social issue rather than an employment one.

She sounds like she's bored of her life and wants you all to think she's more interesting than she is. It can also actually be a sign of being a victim of abuse.

You don't need to engage.

You could make comments about the facts if it's facts she's told you that have changed. Perhaps "oh, last year you said you and to X with your husband. Sorry you split up but glad you hear you've found happiness again with your wife"

So you aren't calling her a liar outright but you are showing you remember what she's said.

We had a colleague that embellished her home life dramatically and we knew it. She knew we knew it when we would ask her very pointed questions that relied on her remembering the lie she'd told!

But apart from this very weird trait she had she was bloody brilliant at her job.

@Yellowdove how long has she been employed there?

Maybe she doesn't want people at work to know about her personal life. And your aunty shouldn't be talking about the families she works for.

So you don't like the way she lives her life. What gives you the right to criticise her conduct? You need to wind your neck in!

I guess the bottom line, as long as she produces good quality work, then they can say the sky is pink, etc

Actually they are.

They are bound by confidentiality which means not discussing anyone in their care that can be identified.

So "one of my charges was so sweet today and picked me a flower from the garden" ok.

"Little susie Smith who lives in x street - oh she's the dd of Sharon smith who you work with picked me a flower today ........" not ok.

No, no of course your not. And that makes perfect sense, I just didn't think on that side of things and thought to my situation with a nightmare of an 18 year old that at the moment if someone asked me if I had kids I'd deny this one immediately!! (I'm joking obv I still love the little shit but I don't like him much just now!)

Tell her her childminder is your aunt, that should shut her up.

Beyond that it’s not your company so there is no point wasting any more time thinking about this. HR can’t do anything about it because she hasn’t done anything wrong. In a classic MN phrase, you are over invested.

This is like that scene in Les Mis where the other seamstresses get Fantine sacked for hiding she has a daughter 😭

Seems like your the one with the issue , maybe you should change jobs if you can’t stop bringing up her personal life. Also , your aunt has breached data herself to you so that ain’t looking good either 🙄

This

Ok but I saw her so I don’t see how my Aunt could have denied all knowledge of her or her child. As I’ve explained.

I assume she knows the truth - she doesn’t chose to share it with you!

I am intrigued about your job. You come across as very unprofessional and immature. Are those qualities also required?

Yea....I call bullshit. Your Aunt is her childminder and her bff is HR? Pull the other one!

Perhaps the HR lady is her girlfriend and she hasn't I formed her husband :)

I worked with someone once,we were sure she lied about where she lived and where her children went to school. Turns out she had also lied about her professional qualification (forged the paperwork) and tolen charity funds raised by the local community among MANY other things. She was escorted off the premises.

Maybe mention to her manager. Might be a puzzle piece in a jigsaw you're not aware of?

@Yellowdove i would just leave her to it. You’ve said that she does her job well and that’s all that matters. If she was selling our personal data outside the front of Tesco then I would be more interested.

You’ve got it in for her havent you OP?

You and your aunt sound really scheming and vindictive. Discussing her children whilst your aunt is their childminder is a huge red flag.

If you feel the sensitive data at your place at work is at risk due to her “lies” then by all means raise your concerns with your/her/senior management. But don’t expect anything of it unless you have some pretty cold hard evidence to back up the threat of security.