To think they should sack her?

[Yellowdove]

Colleague in work seems to lie a lot about her home/ family life that are easily proven to be untrue. However, she is really good at her job and has never lied about a work related issue (as far as we know). My point is how can we trust her if she lies about such pointless stuff in such a compulsive way?! HR seems to be saying as a it isn’t a work issue there’s nothing we can do. But how is it not a work issue?

I’m not seeing why people think it’s odd she’s made friends with HR? Do you not make friends with the people you work with? Says more about you tbh.

I actually know someone like your work colleague. It baffled me but turned out she had a very awful home life and coped by making up a fantasy life.

It says more about you though, when you’ve got your aunt dishing the dirt on her…

I think if I worked with the office gossip, I’d probably lie about my home life too, just for entertainment value.

She’s entitled to a private life and you’re a gabshite nosey parker.

You’re coming across as totally unhinged.

How long has she been employed?

For at least the the THIRD time I saw her leave my aunts house. That naturally led to us discussing it. Don’t pretend like any of you in the same situation wouldn’t have found it odd and talked about it

That seems to go for your Aunt, if anyone.

She should not be discussing any of her clients or the children she cares for.

It's not odd but it's very odd that you've decided that they are best friends? What do you base that on? How would you know?

A few months. Not long.

So this woman thinks your aunt is her friend, enough to invite her into her home for a party, yet your aunt thinks it's OK to go and then (ignoring GDPR aside!) gossip with you about her behind her back? Your aunt is being that two faced but you're calling your colleague untrustworthy and defending your aunt? And you still think YOU'RE trustworthy enough to do the job you say your colleague isn't fit for, despite stalking her on social media, bitching about her behind her back and trying to get her sacked, all while she has no idea that you're related to her childminder/friend, who's feeding you information about her and her family? Hmm.

Yes yellow. I hadn't read that when I typed. This is moving fast.

But it's still confidential if you saw her with a child and then questioned your aunt on why there was 1 and a boy and she gave details such as what children she has, her marriage status etc.

If you saw her leaving with 1 boy. Next time she says she has twins daughters you could easily reply "oh, what do you do for childcare with them? I saw you leaving X childminders house the other day with your son".

If you want to you can say she's your aunt and you were arriving for a visit when she left. But honestly if your aunt has told you more than you personally witnessed she is risking her own job.

It's odd to orentend to be sane sex married when you have a husband (I can understand the other way round more)

And I suppose quite offensive if she is speaking of "her strugggles" as a gay woman (though of course she can be gay/bisexual and currently married to a man)

If she is on social media with a husband can't you just comment "looks a fun day out" on an appropriate post?

@Yellowdove when you saw her leave your aunts house, did you say hi?

If not, why not?

Have you told her you know her child minder?

That’s dishonest m. Do you deserve the sack?

You have been to HR, discussed her with her childminder, looked her up on social media.

You are obsessed, to a degree that it’s really quite scary.

@Yellowdove so a few months....

Why so vague?

5,6,7,8,9?

Any work issues?

When would she be deemed safe by you?

How can someone be trusted to handle valuable sensitive data if they wouldn’t know the truth if it hit them on the arse?

They’re two separate issues. If she’s good at her job and HR have no issues then what’s your problem ? Presumably you know HR are OK with it because you’ve been to them to complain. I don’t understand why you’re trying to get her sacked, or why you’re taking what the aunt has said as gospel. I’m with others on here - it’s the aunt that should be sacked for breaching her employers’ confidentiality, and it sounds as though she has an axe to grind, or she wouldn’t be gossiping. If I were you I’d mind my own business before your actions are construed as bullying in the workplace and you put your own job in jeopardy. And they wouldn’t have much trouble proving it if this post proves to be outing.

Because I was in my car…

@Yellowdove you just sound like you want to drag this woman down. Leave her alone, you have no idea what her home life is really like, and slating her on here is making you seem like a very mean person. You say you are fiercely protective of your clients rights - that’s great but you’ve said yourself she does a stellar job at work. Leave her be and find something else to take to your aunt about.

Get competitive with it every time she tells a whopper tell a bigger one and see where it goes

It’s been a rollercoaster!!

I’m not at all obsessed with her. If you think looking at someone’s Facebook is obsessed to a scary degree everyone is obsessed with everyone.

I actually agree with you OP, I’d worry about working with someone that lies to this extent. You can’t really do anything about it but I’d keep my distance professionally if possible and personally. I’d be surprised if it didn’t leak into her work life.

I am going to guess, that you are known as a busy body at work.

Your Aunt also knows this and they are winding you up between them.

And the HR best friend is in on it, as they also know you are a busy body, and waiting for you to melt down and shout all your evidence at her.

Then sack you.