To be sad that Queen has died but can't wait for the sycophancy to be over

[bedtimestoriesforbears]

I am no royalist but like many in the same position I am truly moved by today's historical news

It is a "once in a lifetime" moment for many of us and I am going to admit that despite strong Republican views I surprised myself by being knocked sideways by news

Not that it wasn't expected and that the Queen hasn't had a good life but by the sheer magnitude of what is happening

However other threads seem to be dismissing the fact that we can feel both - sadness that an elderly individual who was "known" to all of us has died and an unwillingness to join in the "grief jamboree".

I feel like I did when Diana died - I am struggling to recognise the grief others are manifesting and the absolute deferential attitude present here

I feel like this will just build and build and we will be exhausted by end of it

YANBU - fortunately I am going away this weekend to somewhere fairly off grid so will be spared the maudlin sycophancy. What irks is the media presuming everyone feels the same and only every interviewing people who are prepared to emote and toady. They never interview anyone who says they are not that fussed as they never knew her. But lots and lots of us feel like that. The indifference that dare not speak its name.

@Kashmirsilver can I ask a genuine and non-goady question?

Who are we being tactful for? I mean, I doubt the RF are all over these boards to see what people are saying.

Whose feelings are we hurting by respectfully discussing the varied responses to her death? Genuinely why are we being tactful?

I honestly don't get it.

Nobody is forcing you to grieve, absolutely nobody.
You are free to do as you please.

I don't think people mind what you're saying. More the timing of it.

The facebook poem is awful.

I'm a bit of a hypocrite because I was glued to the rolling news waiting for an announcement, but the overly earnest manner of some of the contributors (not the lovely Huw) gets on my nerves. It was the same when Philip died; you can tell they are revelling in being part of the 'pageant'.

Yanbu.

I'm not sad.

Think it's a bit weird people are actually devastated

She was a very rich, very old woman who lived a life of unbelievable privilege

And now we'll need to watch lots more of tax payers money being wasted

I hope the over zealousness doesnt take hold. Or people criticising others for not following supposed mouring "protocol "

This. It was met with genuine anger and aggression if you didn't emote properly about Diana at the time. Very odd.

Grief is for family and friends, surely. Complete strangers grieving the death of someone remote from them, who they never knew, is just weird.

You know what sticks in my mind; when Diana died we did an exercise in Higher English, analysing a Guardian article written by a teenage girl. Her mum, also named Diana, had died in the same week as the princess and she saw people crying in the street for a stranger but nobody really gave a shit about her mum.

That's always stuck with me, and I'm reminded of it again now.

That Facebook poem is truly awful

And I'm going to be pissed off if any of my plans are disrupted for any of it.

You dislike the deference, yet you instinctively capitalise the queen.

Sorry OP you are a product of the system

That and the bloody Paddington illustration.

@BonnesVacances

Timing?? If not now when?

I am NOT disrespecting her death just the freakish ghouls who are "thriving of it"

Shall I leave it til next February when it is no longer newsworthy or contemporaneous then?

Step away from the screens.

Job jobbed.

You put it really well @bedtimestoriesforbears

I’m a republican on both my passports (I have dual nationality). But it’s sad news because a 96 year old woman should have some privacy in her last days. I wish they’d not said anything and announced it tomorrow (Friday).

But OMG King Charles - we’re in for it. He’s an arrogant ignorant man - a terrible combination.

It comes to something when somebody can't even see the significance of Her Majesty's death. Of course it's not going to be a 5 minute wonder. No doubt you were one of those complaining about the coverage of Prince Philip as well. You have a choice to follow events, as we have for being invested. YABU, as you asked but I can see you're getting defensive. As for the person who has denigrated the Queen, when she's not even been dead for a day, just sick.

Absolutely! I think the monarchy is an anachronism in today's society but still feel a bit sorry for her family (as I would anyone losing a loved one).

The amount of people acting as though her death is a national tragedy is bizarre though to me - she lived a life of unparalleled luxury to the ripe old age of 96 with few serious worries. Popping off now is hardly unexpected or a sad end to a long life.

I know what you mean.
I'm sad. Sadder than I thought I would be actually. But I'm not posting pictures or condolences to the royal family on my social media...I don't have any of them on my friends list curiously.
And I'm certainly not sharing twee cartoons or terrible poems.
It's a very sad time for her family and friends of course and it's a moment of major historic significance but the huge outpourings of public sentiment that royal/celebrity deaths precipitate are not my thing. Obviously people are entitled to do whatever they like, but I won't be joining in and i will be quite pleased when it calms down.
My biggest concern at the moment is that I am supposed to be running part of a really big community event next week and am waiting to discover whether the committee decide to go ahead or not. I've got mixed feelings about it as it's a rather boisterous affair and I can see it might upset some people but it's been a long time in the planning and lots of people have worked incredibly hard to set it up.

@Tierne

You dislike the deference, yet you instinctively capitalise the queen.
Sorry OP you are a product of the system

I dislike the sycophancy of it all.

I am an atheist but would still capitalise "God" - it's standard English

Same with the Queen

Agree about the poem… It is dreadful, I’m afraid.
I sincerely hope this won’t be promoted as a piece of modern literary genius.
I am respectful about the death of a very old lady, but I’m also not buying into this ‘my tribute is better than yours’ thing.

Exactly a lot of people want forced grieving for someone they never met and didn't know they existed.l and lived to a grand old age, I have sympathy for the family but it ends there.

My sympathys lie with family's and friends of the 100s of people who have lost someone today and we're probably taken too early.

Tomorrow even? Kicking off within a few hours of her dying is disrespectful and goady.

@Culldesack

You are unhinged - where have I been disrespectful?

You have a choice to follow events

Well that's not strictly true is it? Unless you completely isolate yourself from all media for the next couple of weeks, you can't escape it.

And no one is saying they don't recognise or appreciate the significance both culturally and historically- just that they'd rather it wasn't such a performance.

I've watched the first hour from about 6pm when it was announced. I'm now watching Netflix I don't want to watch all the coverage. It's very sad and end of an era but I don't want to join in with public outpouring of grief. I find lying in state goulish