To really really want/need a job

[MoreThanAFeeIing]

I haven't worked since the 90s when I had DD. The original plan was for me to be a SAHM until she was in high school, and in the meantime I studied and did some volunteering.

However, massive spanner in the works, I was diagnosed with a chronic illness 15 years ago which has left me unable to get out of bed some days, much less do a day's work. I'm also on medication which has nasty side effects, so I'm ill for a few days a week with that too. My illness can be unpredictable - I can be in moderate pain for a week, say, then have a massive flare which knocks me for six for another week.

So. If I haven't worked for almost three decades, I'm in my 50s, I'm disabled, I have no references or recent experience - how on earth do I go about getting a job? I've applied for so many things but as soon as I ask for references I'm up shit creek. There's so many jobs I can't do anyway - for example, retail is out, as is anything I where I need to be on my feet. And it would have to be part time, and I'll need time off for hospital appointments (I have them every few weeks). I've applied to all my local charity shops for voluntary roles to beef up my naked CV, but they all need references. Which I don't have.

It's been ok up til now - DH is on a good wage, about £26k, so we've coped, but things are starting to get really tight. I feel awful that he's the only earner and I'm unable to contribute.

I don't know if there's any advice for someone in my situation but if there is, please share. Mainly though I think I'm just venting at how frustrating it all is.

So sorry about the arthritis, that really sucks.

You can work from home, the reason your tenacy agreement says you can’t run a business is to prevent annoying neighbours. Like the guy opposite me runs a car wash from home and is always taking loads of car park spaces on a crowded street.

Go on indeed.com and search for jobs you can do remotely. There are some freelance writing gigs (writing website content) or proofreading etc. Please don’t get sucked into writing a fiction book, it is incredibly hard to make money from freelance fiction and the only people I know who are making any money write erotica. If you fancy writing erotica and self publishing it on Amazon, maybe give that a go, but you’ll need to work out how to pay for adverts etc. Having an employer is less stressful!

References - keep looking for volunteer work until you find someone who’ll take you without a reference. If stuck ask your local vicar for guidance, you may never have met him but you’re still part of his flock to him. I can’t believe churches would need a reference to let you help out in church!!

Apply for benefits again and ask the job centre if you can see one of their work coaches.

It is so so hard to cope with job hunting while ill. You’re doing great and it will work out eventually.

xx

InChocolateWeTrust
seriously! Give it a rest. 🤡

Op I mean this respectfully but you’ve been denied pip - are you sure you’re honestly not able to work at all? It’s is more a habit? You seem to be putting barriers in place at part time roles etc. most people can soldier on one day or so if part time, knowing you have more time off. Of course yes you have health issues but clearly they’re not impacting you enough to qualify as pip

many people work who really just about get through the day - such is life

you didn’t meet pip eligibility which makes me question whether your condition impacts you as you say

you want to work which is great!

if you have a flare up surely you can offer to work different two days? - that what my colleagues do. They work their ‘best 3 days a week’

id not bother with volunteer work - you’re worth more than that. But I don’t believe you can’t get a local job in a garage etc or even a physical job doing one day

One way to get voluntary experience more informally is to get involved with community groups or church/synagogue/temple/mosque/gurdwara activities, put yourself forward for things and go from there. Meanwhile, do a course, something part time but face to face that lasts for a year or two, so that your tutor gets to know you. At the end of the course you should have a fresh qualification and two referees.

Would your housing officer give you a reference?

I think you should stop applying for things formally until you have references. You’re just knocking your confidence unnecessarily.

Also get help to fry for PIP again.

I'm just off to bed but wanted to respond to this first - he's not lying and he's not concealing his salary, or tucking any of it away. I do all the household budgeting and I see what he gets paid every month. I didn't say he was a senior professional - he's senior in his office. It's a very large, quite well known company and his work is definitely not 'low skilled'. Very far from it.

As PPs have said, £26k is a decent wage in some parts of the country, and it's certainly not indicative of a low skilled job.

And no, no friends, me nor DH.

£26 is a good wage near me! Liverpool

esp if not professionally qualified

my db is a teacher or 15 years and only in £31k in further ed

my cousin works as a forensic officer and is on £27k and it’s a massively over popular role

Definitely check whether you are eligible for Universal credit. With a household income of £26k and rent to pay you may qualify even if it's only a small amount. I think there is a website called 'entitled to' where you can check. Re-apply for PIP as other posters have said.
Our local housing trust offers an employment support service for their tenants (and anyone else who needs it). It might be worth asking yours if they do something similar.
Good luck.

I applied for PIP several years ago. My arthritis has progressed a lot since then - for example, I wasn't on any medication other than painkillers then, now I inject methotrexate weekly.

This morning I needed help from DD to get to the bathroom, and I didn't sleep at all last night because the tramadol I took didn't even touch the sides. Unfortunately thousands of people who need PIP are denied it every year. The man who did my assessment couldn't even spell rheumatoid arthritis!

I promise, I'm not lying - I've nothing to gain by doing so. I'd much rather be fit and well and able to do any job that came up. 10000%.

Oh gosh I hadn't thought of this!

We've lived here for 20 years so a reference from our LL would surely count?

Thank you so much for this! 💐

Charities are good for remote admin jobs. What I'd do is do a free professional skills course like business admin and IT from your local college. Also, volunteer as an administrator with a local charity to build up relevant skills & a reference. Then you'll be in a position to apply for a remote admin job.

www.charityjob.co.uk/jobs?workplace=remote&maxsalary=35000

A lot of people are denied pip that should get it and when they get the right support they are successful. Please do seek proper support with any new claim/ appeal.

As quite a few pp's have said CAB may be able to help with benefits, help in getting employment and voluntary work and training. A friend of mine was trained by them years back and volunteered for them which led to well paid employment with the skills he gained.

You can also try out the calculator
www.entitledto.co.uk/benefits-calculator/intro/home?cid=8ee4d299-c396-4240-ad97-43e382da2a4f

I think so too. Also check with your local volunteer bureau - they will be able to help as they place people.

Have you thought about volunteering with the CAB. It’s desk based and very important work.

🖕

Parish Clerk? Many are home based and part time, usually one evening meeting a month. I did it after I'd had 12 years off as a SAHM then divorced - I needed something I could fit around school hours and school holidays. It got me back on my feet, provided me with experience and a reference and returned some of my lost self confidence. If you search the websites of the Parish Councils around your area you might find a vacancy.

Why on earth do people feel they need to comment on OP’s DH’s salary. It is always relative to your living costs so if they have managed on it then it’s a good salary for them.

good luck with finding something - unemployment is so low at the moment and I know at my work we are struggling to even get interest in jobs we are advertising

Haven't read the full thread but what about proof reading if you like reading? Lots of aspiring authors will pay for someone to proof read. Copywriting? As in writing blogs and stuff for small businesses? Buying and selling vintage clothes? Remote call centre work?

It is a decent wage dependent upon where in the UK you live, it is probably nearer the average wage than most on MN would like to admit. Like you I have health issues and cannot work full time. Instead I work as a volunteer at a local charity that aligns with my personal world view, they are aware of my health issues and are flexible in terms of attendance within the office environment. As I am nearing retirement it works for me and provides meaningful focus, however for someone in your situation I would strongly recommend undertaking some type of volunteer role with an organisation that can offer you experience within the workplace because a) you can gain knowledge of the modern working environment and more importantly b) if you are viewed as having a valuable input to the organisation then you will come out of the experience with a fantastic reference moving forward. Good luck

OP I too have RA so understand. I get PIP and have a decent job. Apply for all the benefits you can with the help of a person from citizens advice. 💯 you deserve PIP it can be horrific to have RA flares. You just need to figure out how best to fill the form in. There's loads of advice out there including Facebook pages for PIP claimants. Once you've sorted that out then you could apply for a job but only if you're able to.

Maybe pop into the CAB and see what they can suggest. Also go to your local library. Have a talk to the staff. Libraries provide computers and internet access for free. They also provide webinars, online training (covering basic IT skills - e.g. my local library does a course on social media which would help you if you're looking at selling things on platforms), job 'clubs' where you meet people and have CV support etc, its all free. Try communication apps like Zoom (so you can face time people). If you'd like to sell things - have a look at websites like - Etsy and Not on the high street. Websites offer free training and learning eg Udemy, the open university has short free introductory courses, and recruitment agencies eg Reed have training (but you have to pay for the online courses). Steadily, bit by bit, get out and about and start making connections. I think you'll find it rewarding, you sound really interesting, Im sure you'll find like minded people in no time. They'll be ups and downs but keep going one day at a time, building yourself up.

Some jobs just don't always pay and it's area dependent too
Emergency call handler - stressful, needs skills, not everyone can do it. Band 3 which is what about 23k before anti social pay
Band 4 is an emergency medical technician!

I've never earned over 26k and can't find a job near me that would pay that

I work for b&q - that’s the kind of money they pay their department managers. I’d hazard a guess it’s similar in supermarkets. I’m guessing he’s in retail?
b&q are generally quite good employers in some respects, they contribute 14% to your pension and are very open to employing all ages with loads of part time options. I’m on Showrooms so very computer based, designing kitchens and bathrooms - we have multiple staff on 14 / 24 hour contracts.

Secretary (I think that is the title) to chair of school governors? Quite niche but only PT and pretty ad hoc. I’ve known a couple and they only come in to school once in a while.