Porn culture has led to women suffering injuries during sex

[Doyoumind]

Apart from all the violence etc porn portrays as normal, anal sex is definitely treated as an everyday thing that women enjoy. I don't personally. I know some women claim they do but I've certainly known men who pressure for it and I'm guessing it's only got worse in the years since I was dating.

This article suggests women are unknowingly entering into something that can cause serious injuries.

www.theguardian.com/society/2022/aug/11/rise-in-popularity-of-anal-sex-has-led-to-health-problems-for-women

I’ve literally just finished listening to a podcast talking about this, it’s an interesting and horrifying listen.

podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/filia-podcasts/id1461524178?i=1000575752991

If the link doesn’t work, it’s FILIA’s latest podcast.

Good article, it's important for women to be informed of possible consequences.

Agree ime it's men who push for and enjoy anal most.

I’m 34, never engaged in it. I was warned by my mother of the health consequences. Will warn my own daughter too.

Dudes in the past who have asked me if I like anal have always quickly shut up when I replied "yeah I love anal! I have a big strap on, size of a huge dick for you".

They never asked again! (Mind you, these types of relationships don't last. My husband is repulsed by the idea of giving anal)

I read this earlier. It made me think that most of the men I’ve slept with casually penetrated me anally without my consent. So raped me, basically. In fact, only two men I’ve slept with haven’t done this out of a dozen or so. I’m in my 30s. How depressing. I struggle to imagine ever being with a man again to be honest.

I don't understand what's in it for men, apart from the dominance and abusive nature of it. I mean, surely it's the feeling of being able to do anything they want to the woman that's getting them off? And what's in that for the woman?

I cannot for the life of me understand wanting to put things where someone has poo. There is poo in there! 🤮

Ive never been tempted at all and no man I've slept with has ever even tried (and would bloody know about it if they did!!).

Awful times we live in.

It's horrendous isn't it.
Add on to that, that a lot of young people think porn is a good source of education on "how to have sex" so boys are just ramming it up there without preparation which is only going to increase the risk of damage.

No doubt in a minute the thread will get an influx of posters claiming anal is great and anyone who agrees with you is an anti porn prude.

But I agree with the article that teenage girls especially should be educated about the risks of anal

Butt hole is one way street. End of.

I think you can like anal and also know it isn't for everyone, and education on anything related to sex and consent is important.

It's certainly become the norm via porn. I read the article earlier this morning, and was not surprised to read that women are more likely to be damaged by it, as our insides in that area are different to mens.

This will not deter a lot of men from trying to instigate it, sadly.

There is a very accurate line from a gross scene in bad Santa which any women considering it need to view.

That scene came to my mind too.

I tried it to please ex partner and it was excruciating, and I couldn't go to the toilet for days afterwards

Awful experience, would never ever do it again

What was the line?

As usual it is men not knowing or caring anything about the female body and just assuming we exist to be wankholes.

Men need a wake-up call and no further indulgence.

It’s not just anal.
It’s all this ”kink” nonsense.
Choking (technically strangulation), hitting, rough stuff and the list goes on.
Men kill women and get away with it under
”rough sex game gone wrong”.
And if you say anything you’re bigot and sex negative kink shamer.
Girls and young women watch porn like this, their friends try to be ”cool girls” and please boys/men and they feel like thats what they have to do in order to get a man’s approval.
It’s horrible.

Love these kind of unequivocal posts on Mumsnet, there should be a klaxon sounded for pearl clutchers so they know this is their thread

Yes some of us occasionally enjoy anal sex. Sorry.

However , and it’s a big caveat… go back and read earlier in the thread where people have described clumsy boyfriends trying to do anal without consent.

broken down, that’s a penis trying to force itself into an unlubricated space when a person has not mentally or physically prepared for it. That’s fucking horrendous.

If however both parties want the act, and have prepared (this is AIBU so I won’t go into that) … then it can and does happen successfully.

The point is, ignorant men think they can just interchange and do that act with no prep, no consent; no conversation. Forget that.

This is why this rise in anal sex is so depressing - because I guarantee 90% of the acts are attempted without lubrication, and without the person receiving being mentally prepared hence tearing, pain, all sorts of horror

So in short it’s not “porn culture” that has led to the injuries

Porn culture has led to statistically more men attempting an act they don’t understand and without any prep

and (some!!) women then try and accommodate without understanding how they can derive pleasure and crucially it’s not something you can just do as a cold start!

I think there really do need to be much greater warnings about it. I didn’t know women were more vulnerable to injury than men.

If you enjoy it fair enough, but it appears to be sometime that should be done rarely and carefully if at all.

I actually do like anal- I really enjoy it in fact.

Women's anuses are no different than men's- what nonsense!

However, safe anal takes knowledge, consent, and practice. You need lots of lube, you need to start small to relax the muscles, and you need to ensure that you're empty, so to speak. Unsafe anal can cause serious injury - as, might I add, can unsafe and non-consensual vaginal sex.

The issue isn't with anal, it's with the unsafe depiction of it in porn, the lack of education on how to do it safely, and the lack of discussion around pleasure, pain, and consent.

THAT is what we need to teach young women!

The last thing we need is for women who do enjoy anal to feel ashamed of it.

It's not just for gay men, as a PP intimated!

I’m baffled that anal has become something that is deemed a normal part of sex. I’m old enough to remember it being illegal. I’m horrified that women are being coerced and assaulted in this way.

@11GrumpsaGrumping spot on put much better than I did!