... wondering about the worst thing done to you by a so called "friend" *Content warning added by MNHQ - just flagging that some of these are quite upsetting*

[PieRSquared]

Waiting in the airport to collect my DD from her flight (seriously delayed!) at the end of a great trip she's had travelling abroad with a close friend of hers.

It brings up some very unpleasant memories for me. The plan was to travel for a few weeks in south east asia with my long term best friend, first time I'd ever travelled there. On the 3rd day of our trip she met someone "special" and went travelling with him instead!! It really caused me a huge amount of trouble and stress, traveling alone there was not easy, a few bad incidents, trying to make some other friends along the way. It was also a bit more expensive not sharing a room, and deciding on some safer/more expensive locations.

We're not in contact any more, but I'm feeling angry and agitated as I write this, and think about it again. No more coffee for me!

Any other bad things done by friends were relatively minor for me thankfully.

A "friend" I was mentoring presented my essays as her own and received an excellent qualification (I'd lent her them because she's not particularly academic and she was desperate to see how an essay was constructed and also for the lists of references I'd used (which would save her a lot of search time.

I found out because she failed her final essay (went from high 70's to mid 30s for marks ) and wanted me to "help her re-write it". I just didn't respond.

I heard later that she claimed a breakdown and they bumped up her marks to a bare pass level to get her through (colleges and unis will do anything not to fail a student if they can possibly help it).

I did tackle her about it and she claimed she hadn't used mine because she'd "changed the grammar and spelling " (cheeky bitch - nothing wrong with my gramma and spelling).

Yes - I was stupid and naive, but I had known her many years and I trusted her and this was theological college.

This sounds familiar! Her name doesn't start with L does it? I have heard the same story

Over the years I've been hurt by friends but in fairness I think it was because I was more invested on the relationship than they were. I was very needy when I was younger so I was probably a bit much for them.

Reading this thread I am very very grateful for the wonderful network of friends I have now. I'm so sorry for the horrible things so many of you have gone through. Especially @Thorilicious - those girls were bitches

My best friend at work asked me how it was I hadn't realised that the little boy I had lost at 17 weeks gestation had actually died at 13 weeks. "Didn't you wonder why your belly wasn't getting any bigger?". I was so shocked, I just defended myself by saying that I hadn't shown with my previous full term pregnancy until 20+ weeks (which was true), she made me feel like it was my fault for not realising... It was only afterwards I realised what a fucking horrible thing it was to say to someone in my position.
Needless to say our friendship was never the same after that and I now don't speak to her.

@alicewasahorse and @FeelingwearyFeeelingsmall thank you for the kind words. I'm over it now, and luckily have amazing friends in my life now.

Jesus. I’m so sorry. That’s unspeakable.

Decided I was to blame for Covid and lockdowns before my wedding. Didn't come to my wedding dress choosing. Only tried on her dress 3 weeks before the wedding. Came to my hen do under duress, was late and left early. After the wedding sent me some nasty texts because of Covid and vaccines. I've made a couple of threads on here about it. She's been a complete bitch tbh

I made two friends at the school gates-their ds’s where in my dd’s class and the kids where mates
id just come out of dv and was still very vulnerable
these two bitches tried to control my money,slagged me off to my kids,told lies about me and neither showed up to my dds 5th birthday
they ramped up the lies and rumours,lied to my kids and tried to turn the other mums against me (which didn’t work)
I was raped not long after and ended up having a breakdown-to which they made it worse
this went on for over three years and I ended up moving away to get rid of them
i did get ‘public sorry’ on fb last year-my son was accused of dv-all bollocks but I put something about being ‘judged in a kangaroo court and how some people might want to close their own closet door before opening mine’
i got a weak ‘sorry-I was wrong’ from one of them and the other still openly hates me and tries to slag me off to my kids-I wouldn’t dream of doing the same to hers

lynne and Kate-if your reading this-do fuck off-I know all your secrets and when the time is right,I will use them
neither of you have clean hands but I draw the line at you wiping them all over me

I have a group of long term friends who I value more highly than any others. But I now realize that they do not really care, and because they were such good friends for over 30 years I think this has hurt me more than any other.

It all started when I had my second child, who has severe autism and disabilities. I don’t think any of my friends would want to admit this, but despite me still being just as good a friend, visiting, making time, listening to their lives and not pushing my own as much (it can just be too hard for others to get it) - I think they just cannot cope with being that near a level of severity in disability. It breaks my heart, I wanted my child to be accepted with their families, to be included. They would be horrified to think I feel like this, and are left leaning, ‘aware’ and very pro being supportive and yet when it comes down to it, they just can’t handle it and have slowly, but surely, squeezed me out.

I had a best friend for 15 years. It was quite one-sided because she had a husband, kids and a senior role at work so she had more problems than me (my life was very simple) so I was always her shoulder to cry on and I gave her a huge amount of moral support.... but when I was diagnosed with a lifelong and incurable condition and would need some of that same moral support from her, she made up a pathetic excuse and dumped me.

@Thorilicious there are some awful stories on here but yours is horrifying and deeply traumatic. I’m sorry and hope you find some comfort in the shame those people will feel as adults and parents for doing that.

I have also had THREE best friends (so called) who made the first move in trying to sleep with my boyfriend (by which I mean, 3 different boyfriends over the years). In two cases they succeeded. In the third she got him drunk to get him into bed then he could not get it up.

No - starts with J.

There surely isn't more than one of them about!

I applied for a job in the school office and stupidly told my friend. She had no intention of applying for the job but told her husband who said if I am applying she should too. My previous job description and CV matched the job exactly and she told me she couldn't even use a computer. She got the job because her husband was a school governor no one else even got an interview.

This wrings my heart. I’m so sorry.

Best friend flirted with my ex on a night out. Ex and me were still friends but she knew that I was still in love with him but I had ended it as he had lost interest so was wasting my time there. Still she broke the girl code.
She often tried to put off anyone who took an interest in me on nights out after that by telling them something about me which I won't mention as very outing. There was a guy I knew she liked and he came onto me, like an idiot I put him off as I was a true friend. She did one last thing but was so awful I can't bring myself to,put it on here but it was the last straw and I have seen her since.
I was really upset but looking back her friendship,was no great loss as whom does any of the above if they're supposedly a good friend?

At a 16th birthday party and the girl who's birthday it is shouts at me "she felt sorry for me and didn't really want to invite me and isn't sure why im there as her mum didnt like me"

I thought we were mates! She did used to enjoy winding me up for being miserable about my nan dying of cancer and i did keep going on about it apparently. Sorry for being sad!

Brilliant thread

Similar one for me where I spent a fortnight in Ibiza with my best friend at the time. I knew a guy that worked out there (purely my friend, no interest in him like that) but she started going back to his apartment every night after we’d been out. We then would have tickets booked for things we’d paid for and she didn’t want to go anymore because she just wanted to hang about the pub he worked at. He came and said to me he really wasn’t interested in her (even though he’d slept with her 🙄) at one point but she just persisted. I walked back to the hotel myself multiple nights and would be sitting having meals in the buffet alone 🙈 someone even came up and asked me at the pool if I was on holiday by myself. I tried to change to an earlier flight home but had to stay in the end up. Got off the plane when we got home and never contacted her ever again 🙈

I'm so sorry. I was badly bullied at school and pretty scarred by it, but this is truly nasty. You poor thing. I really hope you are okay now. x

I’ve name changed for this post.

I was married when I was young, my best friend was already married and very happy (I thought). I was in hospital with meningitis and near the end of my hospital stay I started remembering odd conversations I thought I’d heard. Both my best friend and my husband told me I’d imagined those conversations I thought I’d heard between them. As time went on I remembered more and more of the conversations I’d heard when I was really poorly. I tried to put it down to drugs I’d been given in the hospital/the fever I had/being really unwell.

I came home early when I returned to work as I wasn’t well and found them in my bed together. She had the audacity to put my dressing gown on to cover herself up.

Nearly 30 years later I can’t deny that I hate them both, they wrecked my family. My best friend was my sister and our family never recovered. I couldn’t be in the same room as them but I understood my mum and dad still loved both of us. I ended up going NC with all of my family, yet my sister and ex still got to enjoy the family gatherings, the family Christmases etc. The worst pain was I never knew that my mum and dad had died, I was told a few months later.

I have a wonderful husband and we’ve raised an amazing family, however I will never get over the pain that they caused me.

I told one of my best friends at secondary school basically that I was depressed and self harming. (I was being emotionally and physically abused at home).

She immediately told the most gossipy girls in my year and people openly ridiculed me over it for ages. This friend also never spoke to me ever again - i guess she didnt know how to handle it as MH issues still weren't really discussed circa 2004, but it made me feel like I was the worst person in the world. We'd been brilliant friends for 5 years, and ironically she had previously confided in me that she thought she might be bisexual - I was really supportive and never told a soul. Why do people behave like this?

Went to my ex fiancé’s wedding, where he married the woman he left me for. Told me I was bitter and mentally ill to be mad as it had been over a year

That's chilling.

I house shared with two friends at uni. Looking back things were a bit tense towards the end of our final year. I thought it was just exam pressure, less time to socialise etc but now I'm not so sure. They had hated my ex, and rightly so, but he wasn't on the scene at that point. Despite the shift in our relationship we hadn't fallen out and when one of them fell apart trying to get her dissertation done on time we rallied round to support her.

Anyway one day one of them came to my room and asked if I'd seen her watch. Said she had taken it off in the bathroom and now it was gone. To cut a long story short the watch never turned up and I'm pretty sure she thought I'd stolen it as there was only the three of us in the house. Nothing was ever said but they both asked me about it and mentioned it repeatedly.

I lived locally so was moving back to my parents and they were moving to a new place together when uni finished. On moving day I helped them pack and transported all of their boxes. Helped them unload into the new house and never saw or heard from them again.

I tried a couple of times to get in touch but heard nothing back. I texted about a year later just asking to understand what they felt I'd done wrong but they ignored me.

Still hurts that they thought so little of me. I hope that the watch somehow turned up years later and they realise it was nothing to do with me.