... wondering about the worst thing done to you by a so called "friend" *Content warning added by MNHQ - just flagging that some of these are quite upsetting*

[PieRSquared]

Waiting in the airport to collect my DD from her flight (seriously delayed!) at the end of a great trip she's had travelling abroad with a close friend of hers.

It brings up some very unpleasant memories for me. The plan was to travel for a few weeks in south east asia with my long term best friend, first time I'd ever travelled there. On the 3rd day of our trip she met someone "special" and went travelling with him instead!! It really caused me a huge amount of trouble and stress, traveling alone there was not easy, a few bad incidents, trying to make some other friends along the way. It was also a bit more expensive not sharing a room, and deciding on some safer/more expensive locations.

We're not in contact any more, but I'm feeling angry and agitated as I write this, and think about it again. No more coffee for me!

Any other bad things done by friends were relatively minor for me thankfully.

Took me a minute too 🤣

I had a massive thing for a guy. He wasn't interested in me because she was stringing him along. She told him how I felt, but did not tell me he was begging her to sleep with him. When I found out, I was completely humiliated.

A friend went off down the anti vaccine rabbit hole during the pandemic. She demanded to know if I was going to have my children vaccinated, and when I said that the oldest one was going to vaccinated, she sent me a message about how "I feel I really have to speak out when I see a child being subjected to experimental medical procedures," followed by a load of stuff about how she felt so sorry for my daughter having to wear a mask at school, and whenever she sees photos of her on SM "the joy has gone out of her eyes" and all this. I don't like the masks either but they have been mandatory at schools in the country where I live, and my daughter has to go to school--homeschooling like my friend does is not an option for us. I actually went out of the way to keep my kids' lives as normal and unrestricted as I possibly could right from the start and am far from being a covid phobe, so her comments really upset me. We have not spoken since.

In my long experience I have never known men do the sort of shit to each other that the ladies have reported on this thread

Female friendships seem way more toxic

@ManAboutTown you have heard about wars yes?

Bollocks. I've known men do some bloody dreadful things to each other, especially when they are trying to impress other men/make themselves popular, or when they and a friend are interested in the same woman.

Very outing but oh well.

About ten years ago. Friends with a large group of people in sixth form. A friend got pregnant six months before I did. When I got pregnant (lots of unsafe sexual behaviour) they insisted I was doing it for attention and told me my baby should die as I'd be a terrible mother. All bullied me over text and turned on me.

I had a termination a week later, during my A Levels. Failed the exam that was the day after the termination. It affected my mental health for years.

Is that post a joke? God men are far worse! Have you been living under a rock?! Look at what the Russian soldiers are doing in Ukraine for starters.

Best friends from the age of 4 until 20.

Slept with my first boyfriend behind my back only found out years later.

Didn't invite me to her 21st birthday.

Dumped me when I met my now DH.

My Dad died suddenly when I was 20. She didn't come to the funeral as she had "stuff" to do with her new friends.

That’s absolutely awful!!! How cruel they could have just said no!!

This is why I never ask anyone for favours anymore. I’ve even had people go and on and on at me offering to do things and when I’ve accepted they then make a fuss or don’t do it.

I just pay professionals to do things now.

Women who behave in the ways described in this thread are generally called bitchy, gossiping, manipulative etc. Men who do the same weaponise this behaviour in high office and call it politics.

This is about how people act towards supposed friends, though.

If you look at the corridors of Westminster, many of those men would call each other friends and are godfather to each other’s children, married to each other’s siblings etc and behave abominably to one another. As PP says, it’s called politics and business when they do it.

I've got quite a few, not only friends but (now NC sister)
Friends Mum and dad had been divorced and her mum would often come out with us to local pubs, she started dating this older guy she'd known from years back while at school and I'd started "seeing" his son, for about 6/7 weeks -nothing serious we'd meet for last drinks, flirt and "neck on" but I really, really liked him - got all the feels, butterflies and thought he was lovely. Anyway this one night Margy decides everyone's coming back to hers for drinks and I think "this is it" I'm going to ask him back and so I do and he does. We spent the rest of the night at her house drinking, dancing, necking, getting hot and heavy but I really didn't want to sleep with him thinking I wanted him to want me more, stupidly thinking he might "fall for me" I was only 17 tbf. Everyone kind of ended up half asleep all over the living room and I woke up freezing and so went upstairs to bed beside my friend. I kind of lived with them due to strains at home but that's a whole other story. I came back down to get a drink like 6.30 to find him sprawled on sofa with jeans round his ankles and Margy giving him a good time. They both looked straight at me never stopped, she just kind of looked at me like no pun intended "the cat that got the cream" (sorry) No words were spoken I was just horrified. I never told a soul and never went back. She married his dad and had another 2 children. Who knows if there Billy's or Johnny's...

This bears repeating.

Away on a school trip for a week in v unfamiliar country (ie not Europe) as teenagers. I didn't know many others there, she did. She was one of my best friends but spent the entire week being super pally with a group I didn't know and leaving me on my own. We shared a room and she was lovely when it was the two of us, but left me feeling like a total lemon when we were in a group situation. It was miserable. This was 15 years ago and she's been lovely ever since but I've never been able to forget it

I dunno the ones about children / teenagers I would take a view on. Your brain is not fully developed and young people are still learning how to navigate relationships (I prefer her as my best friend as she has a horse etc). . Lots of decent people behaved terribly as teens. Not excusing it but the ones by fully grown adults to me are far worse.

This is a good point.
My very good friend def wants me to be there for her more than I’m able to atm as I have two DCs w MH issues, dh who works all the hours and some health issues myself.
i support as much as I’m able but prob not enough.

Dear God that I would never ever let go.your poor cats,hope they were ok.x

The worst one for me was when DP and I had been on a couple of dates and regularly messaging each other. I started receiving messages from an unknown number claiming that DP was their long term boyfriend. I messaged DP and ended it as I would not be involved with a cheater. Turns out it was my male best friend who thought it was funny. DP and I have been together 17 years now and I haven't spoken to former bf in about that time.

While still paying for all drinks, food, trips away even tattoos.
On a night out there was a party after at mine, I asked who was coming back and unbeknownst to me she had turned everyone against me

If you are paying for everything in a friendship it's not a friendship in the 1st place.

That's pretty horrendous. What an absolute c*nt she is.

DF and I shared a creative hobby together and had some limited success with it. We have alot of fun and spend time doing the hobby all over the country. I fell pregnant with my first child unexpectedly and DF was very annoyed when I decided to keep my baby and made it clear that she wanted me to have an abortion and that I would not be attractive any more , the hobby would be impossible to do, lots of really nasty bitchy comments, so much that I stopped doing the hobby with her and she found someone to replace me and I went on to have my DS. This was twenty odd years ago and she has since been to my wedding to DH and seemed like my friend. I have recently found that she has decided to start doing the hobby again with all the other people we did the hobby with except me . She has spoke in interviews in hobby blogs about how rubbish I am at hobby . She even made tshirts up of name of the group of shared hobby collective and gave everyone one except me ! The most hurtful is she took a piece of work that we did twenty odd years ago and removed my part and replaced it with someone else ! It seems sad and petty as we are all in our 50s and 40s now and could having fun ,.which they all are except me ! Can't understand why someone can be so nasty .

@Annunaki

Not childish at all. Horrifying behaviour.