To want DH to not leave DD and I for 3 days when I've got a rotten bout of Covid

[inigomontoyahwillcox]

I've come down with Covid - a really nasty bout of it, I feel like death warmed up and can only just about get myself to the loo.

DH and I (along with a couple of friends who are helping out) were supposed to be doing something with our small business at a music festival this Friday evening - it's a really good opportunity for the business and there's no question he and they should still go ahead (DH is negative and well), but he is still planning on going this (Thursday) lunchtime to leisurely set up our tent (the one we were sleeping in, the tent we're doing the activity in is already set up), spending the evening and day at the festival and then staying after Friday's event until Sunday with the others. Essentially he's attending the festival from Thursday lunchtime to Sunday evening with about 3 hours of work to do on the Friday.

If it was just me at home I would be very much in favour of him being out of the house - other than getting me painkillers and Lemsip there's not much he can do for me. But 14 yr old DD will need ferrying around and looking after to an extent (she has ADHD so needs corralling into getting stuff done, organising herself etc.).

AIBU to expect him to just go on the day of the event and come home afterwards, or even the next day? The other 2 can stay as long as they want, they're not dependent on his presence.

I just feel like I wouldn't dream of leaving him for 3 days with DD if he was feeling as rotten as I am.

Why the fuck is it unreasonable to expect the person who is supposed to love you and care for you, NOT to prioritise a Jolly when their partner is ill and they have a child that needs more care and supervision than usual?

It's perfectly OK, when you feel like absolute shit, to want someone to look after you and take the load off. Otherwise you might as well be on your own anyway.

He could go for the work aspect only. That's fair and reasonable.

His behaviour is neither

Totally agree @Nanny0gg No point having a partner if they don't make life easier and more pleasant. Anyone choosing to go on a jolly when their partner is so ill is not supportive and certainly isn't someone I'd want in my life, especially if you factor in a child with additional needs too. Selfish git.

Well said.👏👏👏

The rudeness of people presuming that every child is the same at the same age.

Beyond fxxking moronic.

Sick of reading it.

Children with or without a diagnosis are NOT carbon cut outs of each other.

The OP does NOT need idiots on here telling her whether or not her child at 14 needs supervision or not.🙄🙄🙄

Nah. Read it. Still think YABU.

I think that unless people have a ND child with all the needs that go with that, they will not 'get it'.

I think that it's incredibly selfish of your DH to do this. Yes, go for the work stuff but he needs to then come home to take care of his child.

I hope you got through last weekend ok @inigomontoyahwillcox and you're feeling much better now.

Thanks @JuneJuly - it was a struggle as I felt abysmal but in the end DD did go to her relatives for a day and night (she was dropped off by a very kind friend) and DH went on the Friday morning, although did stay until the Sunday morning (and then collected DD later on).

He came down with Covid on the Tuesday and has been feeling horrific too - although he's obviously has had the luxury of doing pretty much nothing (although had to do some work from his bed for a couple of hours on Thursday).

And are you looking after him?

Does he now appreciate how you felt?