Drinking while pregnant

[PreggieGoldilocks86]

Was at a bday party last weekend, good friends of my partner. I am pregnant in my first trimester and the wife of the bday boy is also pregnant, about half way along.

She asked if I’d had any drinks since finding out I was pregnant (I am a big drinker usually) and I said no, I was missing the booze but happy to give it up. She told me she’s been having the occasional drink here and there and had given herself a limit of 3 glasses of wine to have the night of the party so she could enjoy herself.

I was honestly a little in shock. They’ve had IVF to get to where they are so really want this baby. Obviously each to their own but AIBU to feel a bit thrown that she was happy to down 3 glasses of wine in one night while pregnant?! I didn’t really know what to say. Maybe this casual drinking while pregnant is more popular than I realise? Do I need to loosen up?! Haha

No I never felt the need to drink. If you can't go out for a good time without needing to drink then you've got a problem.
On Christmas day I did have 2 bottles of alcohol free koppenburg but switched to cordial orange as I got bad heartburn.
I'll never know why people feel it's ok to drink when pregnant, I wouldn't feed a newborn alcohol so why feed the baby alcohol while you're pregnant.

@mycatisannoying that's silly. A couple of generations back virtually all pregnancies would have seen women drink or smoke. It's bad because it increases risk, but still the overwhelming majority of babies will be fine.

@Danielle9891 you can't see the difference between a pregnant woman having a drink and giving alcohol directly to a newborn? Really?

Good for you. I wouldn't feed my newborn chocolate either but didn't stop me eating a heck of a lot of it while pregnant 😂How did you survive 9 months on formula? Or did you use a breast milk bank?

I drank a tiny amount in pregnancy (maybe an inch of beer, a mouthful or two of wine early on, half a pint of something weak later on). A small amount of alcohol is readily absorbed by your body. More and you have ethanol in your blood that can pass to the fetus.

3 glasses is probably a tad risky, especially in early pregnancy

There is alcohol in e.g. fruit so probably an odd glass here or there is irrelevant

We will never know the real risks of e.g. 2 units a week as the research won't be perfomed

YABU. Leave her to it, the chance of harm is minimal.

I think in general foetal alcohol

I had one 125ml glass (measured) during my pregnancies, but only after 12wks and I generally didn’t fancy it in late pregnancy anyway. Absolutely no way I’d have 3 glasses in one evening. A friend of a friend was quite drunk one NYE when quite heavily pregnant which I found really awful. She rang my friend and was clearly very tipsy, had at least 1 bottle of time. No idea if that was a one off but as far as I know her DD has no health issues but not the point really.

Posted too early!

I think in general foetal alcohol syndrome is still quite under researched in comparison to some other conditions and from what I've read genetics can play a part in it as well so some people can have a few drinks and it have less of an impact than another person having the same amount but its still a really grey area. I personally wouldn't take the gamble on it for that reason but then I guess there's lots of things we find harder to avoid that do have an impact like stress for example. There's lots of nice alcohol free alternatives, I had lots of mocktails on holidays and alcohol free prosecco too the other night with dinner because sometimes it's nice just to feel fancy but I haven't touched proper alcoholic drinks since I got pregnant. Tbh I haven't overly missed it either, it's nice having a mocktail and avoiding the anxiety hangover lol.

I’m pregnant atm and will be over Christmas with this baby just like my first two years ago.

I don’t feel guilty that I am looking forward to my one small glass of champagne on Xmas day 💗🎉 the only one in nine months for both my pregnancies! Three sounds a lot to me though…

I didn't have anything to drink when I was pregnant, there are a lot of good alternatives these days which are alcohol free like wine/0% gins etc.

I suppose it depends on people who are comfortable on risking it...some people drink/smoke/ take drugs all the way through and their babies are fine and some have life long complications, it's a level of risk I wouldn't ever have taken.

IVF pregnancy here and I was worried about kissing DH after he had just swigged a beer the other day 😂 in case I got residual beer from his lips…appreciate that I’m OTT though.

The two things I’m missing most alcohol wise are boozy alcoholic desserts and mulled wine…will be doubling up next Xmas though 😉

Recommendations when I was first pregnant in 2006 was two small glasses twice a week - I love wine and measured out my glasses each week.

It changed with DC3 maybe in 2009? But it hasn't cut the rate of FAS and there is absolutely no evidence that tiny amounts of alcohol causes any issues at all.

Did you ladies know Stilton is ok? I’m getting my blue cheese kick that way. It’s because it’s a hard cheese that it’s ok as there is minimal moisture content.

And yes totally agree on runny eggs. I love them and so glad that at least I can gorge on those!

Really missing smoked salmon and brie on toast for brekkie…also missing seafood but apparently prawns are ok as well if well cooked

Guidance changes all the time.
For ethical reasons it’s not something they can test.
We weren’t trying for a baby, I wasn’t exactly child bearing age, we were away, holidays, engagements, weddings… lots of alcohol and we ended up conceiving. I went to the G.P as had drank loads the first 6/8 weeks. I was petrified of FAS. G.P advised it was fine, they had in the past had loads of women aborting pregnancies due to alcohol consumption so changed the guidance.

I was advised it’s unlikely you would do harm drinking whilst pregnant, unless it was to alcoholic levels but there will always be the exception. But I think most people abstain, it’s frowned upon, it doesn’t feel right but each to their own. As a one off, it’ll be fine I’d have thought.

Tuna is fine! Just not too much because it’s high on the food chain so may have higher levels of mercury.

I didn’t touch a drop whilst pregnant. Didn’t feel right.
I wouldn’t judge someone who had the odd rare glass but 3 in one night after going through ivf to get there would raise my eyebrow too.

What if you don't know you're pregnant and you carry on partying? Are you still the spawn of the devil?

I don't think anyone here is calling anyone spawn of the devil. Most people have spoken about their personal choices. If you don't know that you're pregnant then why would you avoid anything? Same as when you're ttc I avoided things then thought I had a negative test and had cocktails and sushi etc and then realised it was just a bit too early. But hey ho.

A lot of people drink through pregnancy (knowing they are pregnant) for their own reasons and it's not for anyone to judge anyone that harshly. Most people are just doing the best they can with the info and support they have available. So bit of a nonsense comment really.

Personally, drinking whilst pregnant is a huge no no, I didn't and wouldn't.

@SaveMeFromMyBoobs

I work in the field. The placenta is not a barrier, that was proven incorrect many years ago. Most things cross it.