AIBU to think my dd is overweight

[HappyMom1122]

My 15 year old daughter is 6'2 and 220 lbs. I definitely think she is overweight. But, my daughter insists that she is not overweight and she does quite good at basketball. She says that she's athletic. She also claims that she's quite as fast as her teammates(which I think she actually is).

But, the number is too high to believe that she isn't overweight. Also, her basketball coach also thinks she's perfectly healthy.

AIBU to think she is overweight?

Please get therapy for yourself.

Gross. Why would you post pictures of your daughter so all the world can gawp at her and judge her? Dick move, op.

Again, how can you be certain OP’s DD is healthy when her height and weight centiles are above +4SD and +3SD (which are the highest line) respectively? The charts account for completing puberty.

🤷‍♀️ There’s not a lot you can do if she is happy with her weight. She’s active and feels good both of which count for a lot.

Have healthy meals at home, no junk.

That’s all you can do, end of.

BMI is an outdated method, especially for anyone who isn't a white male (original study).
It is also proven to be completely inaccurate for many athletes.

Height to waist ratio is thought to be a better indicator of health.
Also, where she carries her weight. I highly doubt she has a large middle, being a basketball player.

Obesity related disease processes are not likely to manifest themselves in a child, things like T2DM, NAFLD, Hypertension, Heart Disease, etc. So from that point of view, although she may be overweight, she’s not at all likely to have any underlying health issues going on, especially so as a sporty, active girl.

What is far more likely and prevalent in teen girls is Eating Disorders, Mental Health problems, problematic use of drugs and alcohol, etc - all of which the OP will contribute to if she continues to make moves to undermine her daughters self confidence and body image.

The tiny sylph-like little tinkerbells on the thread really need to stay in their lane and stop fuelling the fire that the OP has managed to dream up out of nowhere. She’s active and comfortable with herself, and OP has given no indication that she’s at all unwell or unhealthy or troubled in her eating habits. A balanced person would be able to see that there is currently no issue at all. It might be appropriate to reassess after puberty and see how things are but at the minute, I think it’s a very, very bad idea to interfere with anything or start her down a path of dieting and weight/body related neurosis.

With all due respect OP you, are a massive arsehole.

Get over yourself and your obsession with her weight it’s unhealthy and you will end up with her cutting you off.

So max for her height is 188lb so yes she is overweight BUT I'm a stone and half over my max healthy weight and feel ok about it. I'm fit and I'm try to eat better. Iv always been about a stone over my max healthy weight from age 13

Obesity related disease processes are not likely to manifest themselves in a child, things like T2DM, NAFLD, Hypertension, Heart Disease, etc. So from that point of view, although she may be overweight, she’s not at all likely to have any underlying health issues going on, especially so as a sporty, active girl.

a) there is more to health than your list, for a start how do you know that there isn’t an underlying reason for the high height and weight, you don’t without specialist review, and b) T2D at least is increasing in incidence in children so not so without specialist review no you can’t be certain OP’s DD is healthy.

What is far more likely and prevalent in teen girls is Eating Disorders, Mental Health problems, problematic use of drugs and alcohol, etc - all of which the OP will contribute to if she continues to make moves to undermine her daughters self confidence and body image.

Which is why I said OP isn’t going about things in the right way.


The tiny sylph-like little tinkerbells on the thread really need to stay in their lane and stop fuelling the fire that the OP has managed to dream up out of nowhere.

I post as an overweight woman. But thanks for thanks for that.

Her sports coach thinks she’s fine

why would a bunch of bored people on the internet using outdated, blunt biometrics based on white men to make sweeping statements about a child who they’ve never seen know better than the person who sees her play basketball on the regular?

Oh, yeah. She doesn't have a big belly at all.

So HappyMom363 posted in 2019 about her super tall, overweight basketball playing daughter and now you OP @HappyMom1122 are posting about your super tall, overweight basketball playing daughter but that's not you?

Riiiiiiiiigggghhhhhtttt.

Someone has ishooooooos. Mom.

@EmeraldShamrock1
5'4 might be the average height for women in the UK though taking other countries into consideration, average height for a women is 5'7.

Link for this stat please? I highly doubt it considering the overall global population weighted towards Asia.

In fact, a 2 second google gave an average global height of 5'3. So where did you get 5'7 from please?

What/how much does she eat?

Why on earth would you post pics of your daughter, you massive creep? Does she know you posted the pics? MumsnetHQ, we need a safeguarding button..

Well, I'm 5'11" and I'd be / look fat at your weight. We're all different.

Except I didn't post pics of my daughter. Idk how people are saying this trash.

I dont know where yall getting this info that I posted pictures of my daughter here. Nope, I didn't. Never. Stop.

I am a similar height and weight to your daughter. BMI is flawed, and worse for tall people. I am not overweight - I am a size 12 and my waist is 32" which is under half my height. I am naturally broad and muscular and would find it impossible to get into the 'normal' BMI range.

6'2 and 15 stone isn't huge, especially if she's playing something like basketball.

My DB is 6'4 and 19 stone, he plays rugby and is literally a brick shithouse. Totally solid.

I grew up with a mother who put pressure on me to constantly lose weight and have struggled through body dysmorphia all of my adult life. Please don't do this to her.

Oh stop OP. We all remember!

My sister is 6'2 and 364lbs. She is obese. Based on that I think 220lbs is fine.

Does she look like Liz Cambage in proportion? Because her measurements are very similar to what the OP describes, and her weight is clearly not an issue. Other basketballers would be similar- it's that they are broad as well as tall, and carry lots of muscle.

If on the other hand she is a very slender frame and not muscular then the weight probably is an issue.

There really is no 1 size fits all. If her coach doesn't think it's a problem, it probably isn't.