Racist message in group chat WWYD?

[Thebeastofsleep]

DH, not me. Is in a group chat for an up coming stag group. DH only knows he stag and no other attendees/ group members. One group member has been posting 'banter' in the chat - memes, videos etc. Most of these have been fairly normal fodder, some slightly offensive. No one in the group has reciprocated/ commented on these but he keeps doing it. Stag has commented that its a group to plan the stag do, not a jokes thread and tried to get it back on track. Now the same person has posted an overtly racist video. Its shocking. DH is absolutely outraged.

WWYD:

1. comment that the video is completely in appropriate and leave the group and not attend the stag do.
2. comment that the video is completely inappropriate and leave group but still attend the do.
3. comment as above but stay in the group and attend.
4. say nothing, leave the group.
5. say nothing, act like it didn't happen.

DH is erring on 1 at the moment but he has no idea who this person is in relation to the stag/ rest of the group other than he isn't the best man.

The thread is about a white male posting a video of POC being shot. He considers this amusing.
I'll wait while you think that one through a little....

Yeah that's basically the same as 3,which would be my choice too

Yes, I can read thank you.

The video is abhorrent.

However, this thread has derailed into chat about misandry and about white male privilege which has nothing to do wiht the OP and isn't remotely helpful.

btw, feel free to quote but my understanding was it was a video ABOUT people shooting "ns" - which is a word quite often used in rap songs. I'm not defending it, before you pipe up, but you are misrepresenting here.

I also can't see anything about him being white.

Given OPs updates about his hideous views about women, I think we can just assume the guy is an absolute racist, sexist, hideous wanker, and the group in general need to get a grip.

Not the place for a discussion about 'male privilege', though (and even though I agree with PP re misandry I told her the same). it just becomes another thread that descends into mayhem otherwise and away from the point.

When a poster decides to use the thread as a vehicle to push their male rights agenda, and in doing so compares racism to comments about men on MN, its not remotely 'helpful' to allow that to stand unchallenged either. Precisely because racism is the pertinent issue and shouldn't be diluted by that agenda.
If you really believe the term white male privilege is irrelevant on this thread, your lack of understanding is the problem, not the comments I choose to make.

I see. So misandry can't diulte it but your own agenda again.

I note you didn't address any of my points?

PS re the privilege - I understand perfectly fine your point. I just don't agree with it one iota, and I am not remotely interested in it.

I not sure you understand what White privilege actually means.

As white males they acknowledge their privilege

you di know white privelge also applies largery to women, eg white women get most lenient sentences of all in court.

No, none of us knew that white women also benefit from white privilege 🙄

Interesting how you on one hand don't believe in the concept of white privilege when it comes to men, but do when it comes to women.

Ok then.

Bizarre.

Of course white privilege applies to white women. What's your point?

They clearly don’t understand the term full stop

Do you think you guys could start your own thread for those who want to engage instead of complete derailing?

Erm, you have been doing it 🤣🤣

Have I? Could you point out where?

By arguing back and forth with @SurfBox even if you have been arguing about derailing you’ve still be arguing and derailing

Oh whatever.

You just spend your time in here waiting to spring and criticise someone.

Not interested.

You literally called people out for doing what you were doing, 🙄

As for what you think of me based on bugger all, then yes ‘Whatever’ would be a good summation of that.

Don’t you just love it when the uninformed pipe up with the denial of white privilege with the argument that they have not been given anything they haven’t worked for and then for good measure throw in barbs insinuating that white women are more privileged than white women. 🙄

Than men…it’s late and I really should go to bed!

I wouldn't mind, but the whole subject of the thread is white privilege. A group of mainly white people dithering about whether or not they should say something to challenge a racist, or whether it would be better to keep quiet so as not to make things 'awkward'. If they can't see the inherent privilege that enables white people, if they choose, to see this situation merely as a social dilemma, then there's a long distance to travel.
Unfortunately when some in their defensiveness tell you off for even using the term (because apparantly it's irrelevant to a white man posting a race hate video!) its clear there's not even a will to start.

but the whole subject of the thread is white privilege. A group of mainly white people dithering about whether or not they should say something to challenge a racist, or whether it would be better to keep quiet so as not to make things 'awkward'. If they can't see the inherent privilege that enables white people, if they choose, to see this situation merely as a social dilemma, then there's a long distance to travel

not at all;if it was a homophobia, islamophobia etc or joking about any serious issue the views would be the same in that people always find it hard to assert themselves.

Of course white privilege applies to white women. What's your point

on mn it only applies to men.

Interesting how you on one hand don't believe in the concept of white privilege when it comes to men, but do when it comes to women

I never said I don't believe it-stop making up things. I said on mn too many threads have used it to batter men with.

Yes, but my point is that it's a privilege to be in the position where the hardest thing for you about witnessing an act of hate is that it's awkward to say something about it.
And yes, you can apply that to other groups. Being able to tut tut about how awful something is that is when its directed to someone who is not you, and would never be directed at you, is a much more privileged position than being on the receiving end of it.

But something was said and it was called out?