To have not found this woman hilarious?

[AllHailKingLouis]

Went to visit my mum - there were a few family members there (aunts) and a family friend who I don’t know well.

Im rather socially awkward (ASD/ADHD) so find it hard to join in conversations but I do try otherwise people say I’m being standoffish.

My mum suddenly said “KingLouis, you like horses don't you? Well Lisa (family friend) has two!”. Everyone looks at me for a response so I say “oh yes, I love horses - I am a bit nervous about them though”.

Lisa says “Nervous??? Why??”

I say “well, they’re big … and unpredictable”

Lisa “no more unpredictable than your average human love”.

everyone starts laughing. I’m feeling awkward now and just reply “yeah, that’s true I suppose”.

my mum says “you used to go horse riding didn’t you KingLouis?”

me: “I went a few times when I was younger”

Lisa: “why did you stop? Too much hard work?”

Everyone laughs.

Me: “No, I became frightened of injury if I were to fall off”

Lisa “Don’t get on the bastard then!”

everyone falls into hysterics and start saying stuff like “oh! Good old Lisa! Tells it like it is! She’s so funny!”

I made my excuses and left. Nothing hilarious about a rude obnoxious person who sets out to make someone uncomfortable.

my mum later called me asking why I’d “gone off in a mood” about Lisa “having a laugh”. I said I wasn’t in a mood, just didn’t find her attitude necessary. My mum said “oh that’s just Lisa! You’ll have to get used to her I’m afraid! She won’t mollycoddle you! Haha”

well no, I don’t need to get used to her, and I don’t want mollycoddling. I’ll just choose not to spend my time around family when she’s around! Everyone involved thinks I’m being a baby about it.

AIBU?

This is what I thought. Perhaps its in her delivery but I can't see why everyone found her so hilarious...

You were a bit ott leaving a gathering just because you found one person a but annoying though, just stay and talk to someone else. I can see your mum's pov, she knows you struggle in groups so specifically found a way to bring you into the conversation, yet after what was at the most a tiny bit of light ribbing (from the way you've described it I wouldn't even take it as that tbh) you make excuses and leave.

Is it possible that if Lisa also hates people and only loves her animals that she also had some form of adhd or social anxiety and her "hilarious" jokes are her way of dealing with it/interacting with people?

Just want to add I didn’t just stand up and make a dramatic exit! 😂 I just said I’d best be off as I need to take the dogs out. I smiled and said goodbye to everyone (even gobshite)

maybe I wasn’t as subtle as I thought though 😂

I am, that’s why I avoid social situations. Autism can do that to folk 🙄

I read that with Mandy from "This Country" as Lisa, and all the rest like Kerrys and Kurtans.

"she tells it like it is" usually equals she's a bit of a bore/know it all/ bully

You say you are socially awkward and Lisa has poor social skills (strange thing to actually take pride in) so I think it's possible your styles of interacting didn't connect.

I'm not sure people were laughing at you, they may not even have found it funny, some people feel obliged to laugh when they recognise someone else is trying to be funny to save the "joke teller" embarrassment.

FWIW I'd have admired your straight forward honesty.

Please don't feel any of it reflects on you.

Sorry but I’m a bit confused but who is Lisa again ?

Apologies.

Lisa is a family friend

it is done now though op.
you shared and in retrospect perhaps shouldnt have as she didnt go with your dialogue
she was all about the Laughter
whereas you were being serious about your nerves

dont dwell on it

@Solidarityovercharity oh do go away! You clearly don’t understand autism at all!

They found like they were all holding you and having fun at your expense. A little odd when mostly family members.

No, many of us don’t.

But what many of us ignorant folk do know is that autism and struggling to read social situations is a key feature

Try again 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

*They sound like they were all goading you and having fun at your expense. A little odd when mostly family members.

Did you miss the bit where she said she is autistic?

Lisa sounds like the kind person who posts things like 'you sound like hard work' and is generally known to be a bit of a dick as they puff out their chests and proudly proclaim that they call a spade a fucking spade, me. All the people without this kind of personality defect roll their eyes inwardly and stifle yawns.

OP - you did the right thing by leaving. Hopefully one day one of Lisa's horses will get so bored listening to her BS that they'll stand on her.

Hahahah me too.

Fellow autistic here.
YADNBU
I can't deal with people like Lisa and I would also have left.
If you are not already, come and join us on the neurodiverse mumsnetters board. You won't get people like the pp saying you are "hard work" on there.

Well done you for getting up and walking away from the nasty woman.

So I am surprised you are so surprised at this situation. This kind of scenario must have been interpreted by you as similar many times in the past?

@Ohthatsexciting I didn’t call anyone ignorant but it’s unfair to say someone sounds like hard work when they’ve specifically stated they have autism and find social situations difficult.
How is that a helpful comment?
Comments like that is exactly why I steer we’ll clear from people, I’d rather be lonely than have to deal with such horrible judgments from people who don’t understand how difficult life can be when you are autistic.

Lisa is a knob. It’d be nice to just eye roll and say “erm ok then” but I would have been wrong footed by my mum setting me up, that’s really mean,

Tells it like it is/I speak my mind types always = dicks

Asd / adhd here too and I'd have probably started an argument with her 🤣🤣 hate rude people like that 🙈 thankfully my mother would have known better than to encourage someone to draw me out. You were right to leave though.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

My ds is autistic.

He will just say something like "time to go now" when it's time and he's learnt to give an excuse.

He's great at verbally being socially acceptable now - however his body language and tone of voice give his true feelings away 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I love it, love him and thinks it's brilliant that he can't hide his true feelings towards idiotic behaviour. In actual fact I'm quite jealous of his need not to validate twats to adhere to social norms.

Don't

"I tell it like it is" is usually, in my experience, code for "I'm an insufferably rude twat with no social skills". I'd second your plan of avoiding Lisa!