To ask if your DH or DP still goes down on you?

[HonestAnswersOnly]

DH used to when we were dating. Then he tailed off as we became a proper couple. He hasn't done it once since we married 6 years ago.

I've made comments, joked about it, he says sure. Bit it's all funny. And then we have sex and he goes absolutely no where near it. Just wham bam thank you mam.

I could be more direct with my request but I'm fairly sure he actually really isn't keen on it and it makes me feel ashamed that he would need to be persuaded into it.

Not looking for relationship advice (though fuck knows I need it)...just intrigued to find out if it still happens for other women in long term relationships?

Or do all men stop when they think they don't have to anymore?

My DH loves it and needs no telling. We both go down on each other pretty much every time we have sex which is 3/4 times a week on average.
We’ve been together 16 years and married for 6.

Dh is very gifted in that department. At least 3 times a week and we have one foot in the grave, according to some on here

Well luckey for some of us on here we’r not married to selfish men. Some people need to higher their standards.

Yes after 10 years, he loves it and so do I. I would be gutted if he stopped!

I could be more direct with my request

Do that. There is nothing to be ashamed of, asking for what you want.

In fact, being able to be open with your requests is for me, the benchmark of being an adult.

That said, I might not ask for oral. I might happen to have a vibrator 'within arms reach of desire'

And ask him how he feels about incorporating it into your love making.

My ex of 6 years used too, but tbh I dont get much from it so it wasnt all that important to me.

Suprised how much sex everyone is getting on here 😂 @Louise0701 how do you find the time 3/4 times a week?

Maybe it's just me but life gets in the way too much for myself and DP. We are content otherwise and it's great when we do it but it's not very often 😂

There’s a sex topic you know

We've been married 20 years and it's still a part of most times we have sex...

Op if its wham bam thank you mam why are you entertaining this nonsence. Tell him your not sleeping with him until he stops been so selfish in bed.

Yet another sex thread where OP never returns.

Hmm…

I smell bullshit on here. Definitely think some people are living in fantasy land. That's my 2 cents. Like or lump it lol

Yeah almost all of the time unless it's a quick one eg last week he got home a bit early, I was WFH and there was half an hour spare before nursery pick up... We've been together 13 years.

We're not as prolific as some on here though mostly once a week sometimes it gets to nearly a fortnight, unless DS is at GPs overnight and then it might be 2/3 times in a day or two but that's only every few months.
I'm all honesty though I've not had a shy retiring past and I've never come across a man who doesn't and I've never needed to prompt, some I've rather they didn't due to 'technique' but never found anyone unwilling. Maybe it's generational. I'm mid thirties.

I can see why a man wouldn’t like it though

same as how I can see why some women don’t like giving a blow job

Why, because some of us have partners who love giving oral? My dh would do it every day if I was in the mood.
Op, as a pp said, I'm not petty but wouldn't be putting out in any way if I wasn't getting anything back. Wham bam thank you ma'am is a euphemism for selfish fucker.

DP and I have been together 20 years and didn’t actually start doing this until about 10 years ago as we were young when we got together and I was always nervous about it.
he’s into that kind of thing but not all men are.
the only way you’ll know is if you speak to him about it. Maybe he thinks you’re not keen? Have you had children?

@RubyWinters at night when we go to bed.. probably like most others? I don’t feel like we have to “find time”
don’t you share a bed with your husband?

So do i, but only from the post at 13.00.

I’m sick of the trope that women can’t ever be having plenty of good sex. Why not? Because you don’t have any? Because we’re middle aged and past the age where couples should do that? Why is it bullshit? What an odd position to take (pardon the pun ). Fantasy land? I truly don’t understand why that’s what you think. Do you actually think there aren’t any men who know that sex is for both people to enjoy and that it absolutely should be reciprocal?

We have lots of it because we both enjoy it, and it’s my second marriage so we don’t have young children and sleepless nights to contend with. It’s an important part of our relationship.

@MermaidEyes No, I just don't believe everyone is being truthful Men are notorious for being selfish in bed and don't think the numbers on here are adding up.
Normal people don't have the time or energy for sex 3/4 times a week so unless everyone is unemployed with no kids, I don't believe it for a second.

Mind you I do take the point that OP hasn’t been back. Meh.

@Louise0701 well aren't you tired after work? If just doesn't make sense. You must have an easy life then

Oh I'm here @swimlyn just crying into my pillow is all.

A couple having sex 3/4 times a week is hardly in Ripley's Believe It Or Not territory

I'll agree, with younger kids it's hard finding the time and energy. But once kids are older, at school and you're working from home, or once kids have left home then you can definitely manage 2/3 times a week if you really want to.