Debating between these two countries. Which is better to bring children up in?

[Mixedfeelings89]

England or America. I am from England, Husband is American. We are not rich, nor poor therefore we would be living a average lifestyle. My only concern is which country will be better for the children? If we didn't have children I wouldn't really care which country either way. I just want the best for the children. Children are not yet school age, if that makes a difference.

Thanks in advance.

UK. For the reasons above and it’s access to other European countries. We overlook how easy it is to be in an entirely different culture and country so easily

Neither.

I would move to Scotland.

No way I would want to live in USA - though I love the country, nature there is amazing and lots of wonderful people I've met - when someone like Trump and his ilk maybe even getting back into power and the Roe v. Wade getting overturned is just too much to contemplate.

Add guns to that and the fact I'm in a biracial relationship, with kids. No. Just no way.

I've lived in both... I like both! But on balance, I'd pick UK. Probably not where I currently love though (near London) as it's so overcrowded.

You could try America though? People really aren't ALL carrying guns there...OK, maybe in some states. Some places are very civilised. Where are your in laws?

I would say UK too, especially Scotland.

Uk 100%

Personally dislike America, I think it’s a brutal country unless you are rich.

Healthcare and education costs are enough to put me off the USA

The reality is if you move to a state like Massachusetts, your children will go to a nice school, your neighbours will likely be lovely, loads of community activities, state university will be affordable (daycare won't though), you'll have decent healthcare, and very little exposure to guns. cheap skiing, sailing etc on your doorstep.

I live here and my kids had a lovely upbringing here. But of all the people I know who moved to the USA 20-30 years ago, not one of us would move here now with the country heading the direction it seems to be going in. Can't answer for UK.

Uk.

A friend of mine moved to us with American and I can't fathom for the life of me why.
Their two daughters are sent to back to back camps over the summer, she was back at work at 8 weeks?
They get few holidays!
The buck buys more house but in the middle of a huge housing estates!
I can't see any life works balance at all.and dhe DDS were hard fought for with many IVF attempt.

I’m American.
I’m ridiculously privileged. We aren’t 1 percenters, but top 10 percent, still insulates us from a lot.
I’m terrified.

If Scotland is an option, or maybe NI, I'd choose one of those. I keep trying to twist dh's arm to move to one of them, but apparently we need jobs to pay bills and eat food or something...the total buzz kill 🙄 😉

You need to listen to what’s happening in America at the moment. They have huge issues with homelessness and drug use. A recent visit from American colleagues of DP has been extremely eye opening in tens of lawlessness and how they are too frightened to visit the companies facility in a certain area due to car jacking.

Add in the opioid epidemic, the lack of gun control and the exorbitant healthcare. It would be the UK every time.

England for sure. Or Wales

What jobs do you both do?

Where in England? Where in the US? What sort of lines of work do you envisage the kids going in for?
Devil's in the details here.

Good point about Massachusetts- or New York State NYC if I was very very rich.
The lack of holidays is a massive deal if you want to keep in touch with family here. You’ll either have to have space for granny to visit or your kids see their extended family for a short holiday once a year.

I’ve lived in both and both have pluses and minuses. If you have a good job in the USA pay is generally higher and insurance covered (although not always for your kids). I love New York and still have family there and it’s a great place for kids. The climate is better in the USA as well and more diverse landscapes. But the U.K. is generally a more stable reliable life with less extremism and crime.

And yes Scotland over England if staying this side.

England all the way...
Plenty of issues in the UK but worrying about school shootings isn't one of them...

US for me. My life is exponentially better here then it was in the UK.

The OP didn’t say ‘UK’ was an option, just England. So I’m not sure why people are replying ‘UK’ as if it isn’t four separate countries.

It would be Florida (husbands state) or the North of England. I don't speak Spanish (most do in this part of Florida) and I have more support in Englnad. I don't want to put where in Florida as I don't want to add too much information that would be outing.

I live in the US now and would pick it over the UK any day. It’s a big country, I’m in CA so politically it is liberal and a lot the things people generalize about the US aren’t an issue here. It is also far more employee friendly than the rest of the US. People see the worst of the city (LA) and make assumptions about it that just aren’t true and my kids have a far better quality of life than they would in the UK. I know this means I am privileged but the US isn’t quite as awful as Brits think if you are lower income, a whole lot of stereotypes get spread around that just aren’t true. And my free public high school offers more opportunities for every type of child, clubs activities, sports etc and we also have excellent public universities with opportunities to do two years at a low cost local college transfer to a big well known university like UCLA. Again all states are different and there is no way in hell I would live in Texas. Are guns an issue? Yes. Do they concern me in my daily life? No. There are pros and cons to both countries but I am very happy with my choice and it would take a lot to get me back to the UK

Can you do both? Live in the US for a while then move to England? I think having lived abroad is so beneficial for children, especially somewhere they might learn another language

We’ve a family home in the North East of England, where my husband grew up. I think it’s a wonderful place to bring up a family.