Or is my neighbour?

[Barbiepink]

While I was at work today I asked my dad if he would be able to come round and trim the ivy/weeds that are growing in our back garden.
He said he would.

I went to work, my dad messages me and tells me he’s done it.

I got home and went into the garden to check out the work.
My next door neighbour came out and told me in no uncertain terms that my dad had cut ivy from their side of the fence as well and he’d pulled it out by the roots.
She said she’d spent 20 years growing it in the way she wanted it to be.
Her husband said she’s been crying all afternoon.

I said I was so sorry and it wasn’t my intention, it was my fault for not communicating what I wanted correctly to my dad. I just wanted the weeds pulled out and the ivy trimmed back as it was starting to grow up through the paving slabs.

Anyway, they were very upset and on the war path.

I went out and bought her some flowers to say sorry and she nearly didn’t accept them, then did, even though she said she was still so upset she couldn’t talk about it.

I hate confrontation and I feel really uneasy tonight now. I’m not sure what to do for the best.

[BlanketsBanned]

Look at your Deeds or speak to your solicitor to determine whose fence it is, ivy doesnt die overnight.

[SurpriseSurprise]

Why didn’t they speak to your dad when he was doing it if he was upsetting them that much

[fatfrenchprick]

Your neighbour need to get a grip, she also needs to make sure her plants stay in her garden.

My neighbour grows ivy and it's almost collapsing my fence.

[Campervangirl]

It was nice if you to buy her some flowers and you’ve apologised, whether you needed to is depatable as your dad said he he didn't pull it from their side, he may have got hold of some roots from your side and inadvertently pulled some from their side.
As for it taking 20 years to grow "how they wanted it" is complete bollocks, ivy grows how it wants and it grows fast.
I have a fence covered in ivy and I pulled it down where it was growing up the wall of the house a month ago and it's already starting to creep back up the wall, it's a menace 😁
I'd ignore the issue, if it's mentioned again just say I've apologised if you were upset but your ivy was invading my property, the next time it needs trimming I will be sure to liaise with you.
End of ❤️

[Tiani4]

@Barbiepink
I think it is unlikely they can sue as they freely admitted to you they have cut the Ivy their side now as well so how can it be legally determined that it was your Dad not they who damaged their side of the Ivy plant. No one will believe he pulled it out by the roots but rather there was an overgrown tangle of Ivy that your Dad trimmed from your side.

And if it turns out to be your fence you'd have a counter claim that they were damaging your fence by letting the Ivy become invasive (although I wouldn't go there unless they attempted to sue you! It'll likely cost them more to sue than they'll get back so I doubt they'll actually do it!)

Your legal line is your Dad cut back the Ivy that grew on your side which you have a legal right to do as it was over the boundary interfering with your property and garden.

I wouldn't volunteer any of the rest other than to say you listened and responded to neighbour with kindness to keep good neighbourly relations if they bring up why you brought flowers round then. My neighbour killed my Ivy in back garden boundary (my fence!) as it was growing through into his greenhouse which was up near boundary. He put weed killer on it and the fence (my fence!) then fell apart as the Ivy had been keeping it up! I had to replace the fence panel I didn't say anything to him though as i appreciated his perspective that it was an invasive nuisance and grows fast! I planted a small tree there instead

[Tiani4]

I meant

• No one will believe he pulled it out by the roots their side as he never leaned over but rather there was an overgrown tangle of Ivy that your Dad trimmed on your property from your side.
  
  How Ivy grows is that the vines wind in and out the fence slats so by his lawful cutting the parts on your side it may have been in the middle of some of the vines that had invaded into your property garden - that can't be helped as neighbours will know full well this-
  
  They could have unwound the vines each year and retrained it (hard to do tho) away from growing between the fence slats.

[Squills]

I would buy them a really nice large ivy plant and a garden voucher.

[milkyaqua]

@Barbiepink

This morning they’re throwing all the ivy cuttings from their side into our garden.

Well, that would seem to indicate your father did do a lot more than he said he did. I'm not surprised they are upset.

[P205]

They won’t take it to court.

unfortunately, you can’t unring a bell. You e apologized, so just draw a line under it and move on. There’s nothing else you can do really.

[SmartCarDriver]

@ImAvingOops

Ivy is a fucking menace. She has no business growing something that is damaging your property, then whinging when you remove it!
Besides, it will grow back in about 5 minutes!

This 100% it's fucking horrible invasive stuff!

[007DoubleOSeven]

Take you to court, for ivy??

I think they're being a bit batshit tbh
Who cries all day over ivy and then refuses a genuine apology?

Leave them to it.


It doesn't sound like your dad did anything wrong.

[viques]

Where does your dad live and how much an hour does he charge to kill ivy? Asking for a friend………………

[WellTidy]

If they want ivy in their garden, and many people do (our neighbour is one), then they should contain it and keep it under control.

If they didn’t, then you are able to pull it from your side or cut it back. It all gets intertwined as a PP said, there is no way you’d be able to do this without also pulling some of the growth from their side. But if they’d kept it under control, you wouldn’t have to.

Our neighbour’s ivy got so out of control (a few years’ uncontrolled growth), that it had a massive trunk and needed a saw and an axe to chop through it. They’re really keen gardeners, pride and joy, but that doesn’t dictate how we can use our garden (the fence our side was covered). It took hours, I would doubt your dad did this.

It absolutely will grow back. It grows rampantly and everywhere. And there has been no damage/loss to them by the sound of it, so unlikely to be any sort of claim there.

[catsmother]

What a load of nonsense. It's clear your neighbours have very little understanding of ivy and its growth pattern

I had a fence replaced a few years ago which had been covered in ivy and three burly builders dug down at least two foot to try and eradicate the roots. What they eventually extricated was as thick as my thigh and even though they pulled up loads I was still finding offshoots from the main stems for quite some time afterwards when I was digging the new bed.

In other words there is no way, no way at all, that your dad would have been able to wreak the havoc they allege simply by casually pulling a few strands through the fence. If he managed to disturb and remove any root matter at all then they must have been fairly new tendrils which hadn't deeply imbedded themselves yet.

I've pulled ivy before now and have been sent flying hard and painfully onto my backside due to the effort required to get it out of the ground - and that's newish stuff, not a twenty year old monster.

Like previous posters I've also sawn larger bits of ivy off at the root, and though that works on the existing leaves, they do take quite a few weeks to brown and wither. It doesn't happen overnight. Ditto when I've resorted to weedkiller. What's more, it's a bastard for regrowing from any tiny bit of root left behind.

Your neighbours sound utterly hysterical and ridiculous. Of course, it's upsetting when the appearance of your garden is changed / ruined at someone else's thoughtless hands, I understand that, but in this case I just can't see, logically, that your dad would have literally been able to do the damage he's being accused of.

[SmartCarDriver]

@viques

Where does your dad live and how much an hour does he charge to kill ivy? Asking for a friend………………

😂

So am I......

[Julen7]

Ivy is a complete menace and neighbours should be thanking your dad not berating him.

[KatharinaRosalie]

as others have said, there's no way one can accidentally pull up a 20 year old ivy by roots. No way.

[SmartCarDriver]

Well, that would seem to indicate your father did do a lot more than he said he did. I'm not surprised they are upset.

The the neighbour should stop their shitty ivy growing on OPs side!

Crying over ivy is ridiculous.

[jessycake]

I have living in my house for over 30 years and never been able to pull next doors ivy from the roots , and it's not for want of trying. Don't pander to this nonsense , he has pulled a few strands that were growing through your fence and possibly thinned it a little on her side . Tell her if she doesn't want it to happen again she need to make sure she keeps it regularly trimmed including the bits that creep through and under the fence.

[Libre2]

@Choccyp1g

Where do you live ? If it's anywhere near me, I'll pay your Dad good money if he can get the ivy out of my garden.

This. But I bet my bottom it’ll be back - it always is.

Your neighbour sounds either (being generous) like a. she has a lot of other stuff going on in her life and this has tipped her over the edge or b. She doesn’t have anywhere near enough going on in her life and needs some outside interests.

You have been more than reasonable.

[astoundedgoat]

@FallopianTubeTrain

He could have aimed a nuclear missle at it and it'll all be back by the end of the week. Your neighbour will get over it, you apologised, nothing more you can do.

On the flipside my neighbour and I have a coordinated battle plan to destroy the masses of ivy that grows down the boundary line, it takes both of us tackling from either side to even remotely make a dent in the evil shit.

Speaking as someone fighting a WAR against ivy right now, I concur.

Also, if she'd been cultivating it for TWENTY YEARS your Dad would need a feckin' bulldozer to get it out by the roots. It would be the thickness of his leg at this point.

It'll be back the way it was by September. Small consolation to you though! Is it originating on your side or theirs?

[Rosehugger]

It'll grow back in about two weeks. It's hardly a precious delicate flower that has been destroyed. They are being unreasonable.

[Cookiecrumble22]

@SmartCarDriver

This 100% it's fucking horrible invasive stuff!

Totally agree its awful. Should not ge allowed.

She should be more understand about her wonderful ivy is intervering with your garden /fencing.

[EvilPea]

im quite pro ivy it is great for pollinators and wildlife, helps cool buildings and stops damp.
however it is a thug and needs to be managed.

they are being unreasonable by the way and what they are saying doesn’t ring true. If he didn’t get into their side, theirs will recover within a few weeks.

managing it going forward. Cut all the stems off at the bottom, it will die back naturally on your side. Theirs will try to climb up and over your fence and then back to the floor (if that makes sense) so every so often trim the ones coming over the top, they won’t reach your ground and root.

[Notagain76]

I spray my fences at the bottom with weed killer at the back of our house, all my fence but neighbours like to grow ivy so I’m always killing it. Same neighbour also thought it was ok to use my tree to support their tree house, soon put a stop to that. They also put tarpaulin on my fence as a sort of gazebo, I took that straight off throwing their staples back in their garden which didn’t go down well. Use to get on with them then heard them bitching about us.