Or is my neighbour?

[Barbiepink]

While I was at work today I asked my dad if he would be able to come round and trim the ivy/weeds that are growing in our back garden.
He said he would.

I went to work, my dad messages me and tells me he’s done it.

I got home and went into the garden to check out the work.
My next door neighbour came out and told me in no uncertain terms that my dad had cut ivy from their side of the fence as well and he’d pulled it out by the roots.
She said she’d spent 20 years growing it in the way she wanted it to be.
Her husband said she’s been crying all afternoon.

I said I was so sorry and it wasn’t my intention, it was my fault for not communicating what I wanted correctly to my dad. I just wanted the weeds pulled out and the ivy trimmed back as it was starting to grow up through the paving slabs.

Anyway, they were very upset and on the war path.

I went out and bought her some flowers to say sorry and she nearly didn’t accept them, then did, even though she said she was still so upset she couldn’t talk about it.

I hate confrontation and I feel really uneasy tonight now. I’m not sure what to do for the best.

I’m a keen gardener and I think they are being unreasonable. It’s an invasive weed damaging your property. If he pulled it out at roots (which well he should) that means the roots were on your side. If they want it on their side then they should plant the roots there. As others have said it grows fast- in fact like an invasive weed because it is one. I think it was sweet of you to but her flowers. It’s nice to try and get along with one’s neighbours. This is not meant to sound sarcastic but do you think they have learning difficulties? If so they might genuinely appreciate you digging some more up and showing them how to plant it on their side.

I think OP has flounced from her thread?

If they saw what he was doing why didn’t they stop him?
meanwhile please send Dad around to mine because next doors ivy is driving me insane….grows while I watch it!

Ignore...........if they have been chucking bits of ivy onto your side it's likely any damage is being done by them. They are nuts.

It will have grown back by the end of the year so dont fret. You said sorry, you cant do anymore

You’ve said sorry. Ivy is basically a sort of weed the kills other plants?! I’m always trying to cut it out where I can in my garden. Just leave it. And make sure no one touches anything on their side of the garden again…

If they saw him pulling the ivy through the fence could they not have come out & said something or stopped him at the time?
YANBU. It will grow back. Neighbour is being a drama queen!
I’d feel bad for upsetting neighbour too but what is done is done & you’ve apologised.

It’s an invasive weed that invaded your garden. Why do people grow weeds and expect other people to put up with them in their garden too. The good news for her is that no way would your Dad have been able to destroy it without a flamethrower!! Bad news for you is it’ll be back within weeks. She should be apologising to you for forcing her weeds on you and not keeping them under control.

Omg all this fuss from your neighbour crying all day about ivy sweet baby Jesus what a carry on talk about a drama Lama. If it was my garden I would have been ok if your dad did your garden and my ivy got pulled out too it’s only ivy it will grow back for heavens sake. The weathers good for plants especially in the summer time. It was lovely of you to get your neighbour flowers and apologise what more does she want. She should now drop it. Let us know how you get on.

Ivy is the devil. Chokes other plants, destroys brickwork etc. your dad did well. Your neighbour is mad. You should Sue her for destroying your fence!

sorry but I don’t believe for one minute ANYONE spends “20 years cultivating Ivy how they want it” but even if they did - it wasn’t how you wanted it and they’ve been extremely lucky you haven’t complained before. It’s a tenacious and virtually indestructible nuisance and has encroached upon your garden and property. You absolutely do not need to feel bad- and I suspect a big part of the reason they are making such a fuss is because they feel embarrassed/ defensive that so much of it has ended up on your property!!

I doubt very much your dad pulled It up by the roots. You would need a JCB to get that bloody plant up. I have it growing in my allotment and it's a mare.

Could your dad go round to apologise and ask them what he could do to to put this right and hopefully they have calmed down. Could you dad put up a strong 6 feet fence round the garden to keep the ivy and your neighbours out of your gardens. Boundary wars in gardens cause a lot of problems. Let us know you get on.

Firstly, "crying all afternoon" is not an accurate measure of upset. She may be overly dramatic and cry at anything. Sounds like she does...
Secondly, it will grow back.

I think it's your neighbours who are being unreasonable., They might like the ivy but not everybody does, and it was growing on your side. Ivy will grow back. They are being hysterical.

when we moved to our house the ivy was 20 years plus we had to saw it out it was so think. It’s such a ferocious grower, I hate it. She is definitely being dramatic and your entitled to pull out from the roots if it’s on your side and that would of course kill off anything on hers.

Omg tell your neighbors to get over themselves it's ivy it will grow back in a week! Some people are so pathetic. Forget about it and move on.

Haha a 6 ft fence will not keep ivy out. Clearly you have never had to deal it. It strangles everything if not not kept under control. Can even bring buildings down!

Seriously your friend is bonkers!

Omg how bloody rude

Op has gone. She's no longer engaging.

Though I'm wondering if she bought ivy for the neighbour as she was contemplating. We'll never know.

u said sorry nothing more u can do… it will grow back 4get about it.

I had a neighbour lean over the fence and pull up a raspberry plant once when I was there and they also tried unsuccessfully to get rid of the Russian vine that I had planted to hide/disguise the leylandii hedge that they planted.I didn't say anything on either occasion as I hate confrontation and pick my battles with care.I think that she is being over dramatic.

I've not read all the posts but generally, even when you tug as close to the roots as you can it still breaks without taking the root out! Simply look at the cuttings left behind by your dads work and you will seen see if their are any roots amongst them.

Biggest eye roll in the history of eyes and rolling @ your neighbour. Good god woman.