To ask is my DD the only Promzilla?

[Stopthebusplease]

My DD appears to be getting in a real state about her forthcoming prom, organising everyone to go and pay homage to her on 'her' big night, and throwing her toys out of the pram if anyone puts any slight obstacle in the way of her 'perfect' night.
You'd think she was planning a wedding, not just a night out.
I know that it's an important 'right of passage' these days, but I'm beginning to wonder if it's all worth it, if it causes this much anxiety.
Are all the girls like this?
Do any of the boys get in this state?
I bet they don't, I bet they just put their suit on, brush their hair and off they go, so why do the girls get in such a state, or is it just my DD?

Ask her to write down the three things she’s worried about.
then address them.
they are still young. You can help and make it fun! Yea

My dd was nothing like that. Why are you allowing your dd to behave like that?

In Ireland we have a debs similar to a prom. Mine was 20 years ago and it was a big deal then - girls did sunbeds, professional hair and make up, limos hired. The extended family usually gathered in the house for a few drinks and there’d be the grand entrance and photos with every blood relative - that party usually went on after the debutantes left. Seems prom might be a similar thing now.

No I got dd a dress off Vinted and she hasn’t really talked about it. A friend has organised fancy transport which dd is a bit embarrassed by! But I’d say your dd is a bit anxious about getting it wrong maybe?

I would be firmly telling her to get back to earth, unless she wants to still go. She needs a major attitude adjustment.

Is she putting this much effort into her exams?

No not at all. We had a bit of a todo for 30 seconds as someone else has the same dress as her but she got over it. I don’t think it’s such a big deal here. They all get their hair and make up done bit dresses are all pretty little thing / boohoo, asos etc. DD’s was 26 plus some heels from new look. I paid £30 for prom and she paid £7 for drinks at someone’s house beforehand, I imagine they’ll get Ubers or mums to drop and collect. No limos or anything. It’s a bit of a non event to be honest

Hand on heart, I wasn't picking

Just pointing out something you might not have considered.

@worraliberty

I’ve been teaching 20 years so of course I know things at home are different to at school. I was merely saying that I see a lot of them discussing prom and none of them seem stressed or over-the-top about it. Exams are their priority.

Fair enough. You said "definitely no stress about prom" and I pointed out you don't know what they're like at home 🤷‍♀️

It my daughters y11 prom soon, she is not like this and neither are her friends. Her friends and girls in her school year are just really chilled and looking forward to it. She is putting all her energy in to her exams. If she was behaving like your daughter so would be told off for her behaviour, if it carried on, no prom!

@SparklyAntlers
YYY to your debs memories. I had mine way back in 1982. Just a happy evening for family and a great night for me and my former classmates. Families gathered in the school, limos departed from there, not sure where my parents ended up after that...

Our debs was in October, long after the Leaving Cert so no worries about exams. Most of us were already in university and recovering from Freshers week, or working, when the big night rolled around.

DD is quite chilled out about her upcoming prom.

Her dad is taking her and picking up;she's having her hair/makeup/nails done at a reasonably priced local salon and there's no danger of anyone having the same dress as her;it's technically vintage as it was mine and it's as old as she is;it looks beautiful on her.

If my daughter had behaved like this she wouldn’t have gone to prom.
She didn’t because she’s a nice person.

It's a 'rite' not a 'right'.

And not all girls get too wound up in the details of the night. It is fun, though, after the pressures of the year they've had to let loose with this, so within reason I'd allow it.

Naw my DD is still too hyped about her exams. She has bought a second hand beautiful Quiz dress off Vinted and a wee bag. Has asked me to do her hair and makeup and will het some shoes after her exams finish.She was bullied quite a bit this year , including before and during an exam, (I know!😥). but now has a couple of nice girl friends to go with. I think she wants to go as in "Pretty in Pink" to show that "they didn't break her".

My daughter is concentrating on her exams. We had a lovely afternoon, a couple of weeks ago, trying on £200+ dresses in a specialised Prom Shop, but she ended up ordering a £50 online.

She's not mentioned her prom since. I imagine she will start getting more exited after this week when the exams finish.

I hope she has a lovely time x

I am confused why is the prom at 16 ? Surely they leave education at 18 ?

Prom wasn’t even a thing when I went to school in the 90s, which I’m glad about.

I’ve had two boys go through prom/formal. It was as much as they could do to try on a suit before the big event! No drama, no stress. Dreading my two girls though - I know it’ll be very different!

It was all my DD talked about for weeks and the girls had very elaborate plans about getting ready etc. The dress was expensive but they all looked amazing.
I'm pretty sure the boys didn't care half as much.

Ordered a variety of suits for DS this week - I’ll send back what he doesn’t like as not sure of sizing. If neither shirt looks good he’ll wear one of his dads as they’re a similar size. Haven’t got shoes yet! He’ll get a hair cut on the weekend.
He’s been concentrating on exams - prom is next week!

DD has hers in just over a week. No drama here, and none from her friends as far as I’m aware. She’s booked for nails, but will do own hair/makeup, and is wearing a dress of mine from the 90s. Still hasn’t got shoes, but we can worry about that after the exams.

This.