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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be relieved the world is starting to see some sense?

782 replies

portugalq · 19/06/2022 18:26

Fina bars transgender swimmers from women's elite events if they went through male puberty www.bbc.co.uk/sport/swimming/61853450

OP posts:
RenegadeMatron · 24/06/2022 12:52

If transwomen are women - what is a woman?

ReneBumsWombats · 24/06/2022 12:54

How did Thomas know which competition and changing room to enter?

MiniPiccolo · 24/06/2022 12:57

FishcakesWithTooMuchCoriander · 22/06/2022 13:37

I suspect Open will be extremely unpopular or devalued as a category, but it’s sensible to have it.

it’ll effectively function as (and be perceived as) a second tier men’s category. One where anyone can have a go, but everyone knows the real prestige is in the Mens category.

The risk is it becomes a place for people who didn’t quite qualify for the Mens to access competitions anyway. If adopted at grassroots level, Open may end up full of men and boys who are just short of a qualifying time and need a chance to swim
at a particular level to try to get one, or to go to the (for example) nationals when them missed the QT for the mens. So a less prestigious men division 2 category. But where you might find yourself swimming against the odd woman or transperson.

I expect it will turn out to be quite hard to set QTs for the Open category.

And it’s likely that many trans women don’t want to swim in Open anyway. Or Mens. They want their identity validated (and the biological advantage) to be gained from being in the Women category.

Oh no... trans people will have to compete against people who have a hormonal and biological advantage. Poor them 🙄

Wonder who else has been having to do that... 🤔

Mascia · 24/06/2022 13:19

TheKeatingFive · 24/06/2022 12:32

The whole idea of being in the 'wrong body' is so bizarre. You cant be in another one.

Also - what if one feels in the "wrong" body just because one would like to be taller, shorter, prettier? What if someone has a disability, a chronic illness that makes their everyday life difficult?

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:36

RenegadeMatron · 24/06/2022 12:45

Once you’ve answered that question - which is ‘why are there different words for women and transwomen if they’re exactly the same thing?’, I’ll repeat my other question for you.

I don’t want to derail getting an answer to the first question.

It’s not that complicated…

You can share the identity of woman whilst also retaining differences.

You can be a short woman and a tall woman.
A black woman and a white woman.
A woman who feels they are born in the correct body, and a trans woman.

They’re all women. They’re all different.

Rainbunny · 24/06/2022 13:39

It's not directly related to the sports issue but I read today in the DM about a man who is suing the NHS for not warning him of any of the negative outcomes of MTF sex reassignment surgery.

He is basically castrated with ongoing medical and psychological issues. He says he was given no counselling, no information about the physical outcomes (which are pretty horrifying to read about) no information on how he would be rendered infertile etc... Now that he's broken and depressed by what he's been through, the gender clinics have no interest in helping him. I'm sure they wish he didn't exist. This man was in his twenties when he went through this, imagine how even worse it may be for people who did this in their teens. I hope he wins and it's widely publicised. I don't like the NHS being sued since it's taxpayer's money at the end of the day but I fully support him.

I think it's the inevitable flood os lawsuits that will truly reign in this extreme idealogy the NHS has fallen captive to.

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:39

What is the fear surrounding trans women? Do you feel that women are unsafe in a world in which trans women exist?

Mascia · 24/06/2022 13:40

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:36

It’s not that complicated…

You can share the identity of woman whilst also retaining differences.

You can be a short woman and a tall woman.
A black woman and a white woman.
A woman who feels they are born in the correct body, and a trans woman.

They’re all women. They’re all different.

What is "the identity of a woman" though? Liking to wear dresses? To bake? Going to the nail salon and for cocktails with girlfriends?

ReneBumsWombats · 24/06/2022 13:45

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:36

It’s not that complicated…

You can share the identity of woman whilst also retaining differences.

You can be a short woman and a tall woman.
A black woman and a white woman.
A woman who feels they are born in the correct body, and a trans woman.

They’re all women. They’re all different.

But you don't know what a woman is, so how can you say this?

How can one identify as a woman if there is no definition?

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:45

Mascia · 24/06/2022 13:40

What is "the identity of a woman" though? Liking to wear dresses? To bake? Going to the nail salon and for cocktails with girlfriends?

If that’s how a particular woman identifies as being a woman then sure 🤷🏻‍♀️

The identify of a woman is whatever that person feels makes them a woman.

VestofAbsurdity · 24/06/2022 13:46

You can share the identity of woman whilst also retaining differences.

What is the identity of woman? What are the defining criteria?

You can be a short woman and a tall woman.
A black woman and a white woman.

Yes.

A woman who feels they are born in the correct body, and a trans woman.
They’re all women. They’re all different.

No.

iamlucyvanpelt · 24/06/2022 13:48

If that’s how a particular woman identifies as being a woman then sure 🤷🏻‍♀️
The identify of a woman is whatever that person feels makes them a woman.

So it has nothing to do with what makes anyone else a woman then?

What is the difference between a woman and a man?

ReneBumsWombats · 24/06/2022 13:48

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:45

If that’s how a particular woman identifies as being a woman then sure 🤷🏻‍♀️

The identify of a woman is whatever that person feels makes them a woman.

So a woman is whatever each individual person thinks it is?

So why can't we all say that Thomas is not a woman? Why have the word at all?

ReneBumsWombats · 24/06/2022 13:51

If there is no objective definition of woman, how did Thomas know which competition and changing room to enter?

Thomas should have been happy competing against the males if the males all simply said they felt like women. Why wasn't that an option?

FemmeNatal · 24/06/2022 13:51

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:36

It’s not that complicated…

You can share the identity of woman whilst also retaining differences.

You can be a short woman and a tall woman.
A black woman and a white woman.
A woman who feels they are born in the correct body, and a trans woman.

They’re all women. They’re all different.

You need to define what a woman is in order to make this assertion. Come on, at least have the decency to try to understand the structure of a valid argument here, instead of relying on assertion.

Without a definition of woman to start from it is literally nonsensical to argue that anyone or any thing is or isn’t it.

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:54

VestofAbsurdity · 24/06/2022 13:46

You can share the identity of woman whilst also retaining differences.

What is the identity of woman? What are the defining criteria?

You can be a short woman and a tall woman.
A black woman and a white woman.

Yes.

A woman who feels they are born in the correct body, and a trans woman.
They’re all women. They’re all different.

No.

It’s a personal identity. There aren’t any defining criteria.

FemmeNatal · 24/06/2022 13:54

As you are really struggling with the whole idea of epistemology and knowledge, try this one.

If a child asks you if they are a boy or a girl, what do you tell them? How are they supposed to know which they are?

ReneBumsWombats · 24/06/2022 13:55

Several people on here think you are a man, Cookies. You champion sexual harassment, discredit women, make creepy comments about me liking you, demand respect for errant knobs and don't give a shit about women's dignity and safety. To many of us, those are typically male traits. If there's no objective definition of what is a man or woman, why are you so outraged that some of us think you're a man? If there's no definition, how can we possibly be wrong?

Mascia · 24/06/2022 13:55

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:45

If that’s how a particular woman identifies as being a woman then sure 🤷🏻‍♀️

The identify of a woman is whatever that person feels makes them a woman.

That is circular logic (yet again) and it doesn't explain anything.

"A woman is whoever feels they're a woman."

Would you apply it to any other concepts?

"A three year old is whoever feels they are three." "A surgeon is whoever thinks they are one." It doesn't make sense and you know it.

FemmeNatal · 24/06/2022 13:55

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:54

It’s a personal identity. There aren’t any defining criteria.

Are you honest enough to stop dodging the troublesome follow-up questions yet?

Why is race, nationality or race similarly open to being defined by personal conviction?

iamlucyvanpelt · 24/06/2022 13:56

StolenCookie · 24/06/2022 13:54

It’s a personal identity. There aren’t any defining criteria.

Then it doesn't have anything to do with being a woman or a man.

TullyApplebottom · 24/06/2022 13:58

And there is nothing to transition from or to. And we can all go home! Praise be

ReneBumsWombats · 24/06/2022 13:58

How can gender identity even exist as a concept if there's no way to define it?

Mascia · 24/06/2022 14:02

Can "surgeon" be a personal identity without any defining criteria? Or "Asian"? Or "cat"?

VestofAbsurdity · 24/06/2022 14:04

It’s a personal identity. There aren’t any defining criteria.

Then everyone is and no-one is.

What else has no defining criteria?