To think neighbours should have sent out a polite notice that there will be a wedding in their garden?

[Pipsquiggle]

Just that really

They have a field, and in the last couple of days I have seen a massive circus tent marquee go up. I have only noticed it as I happened to go on a walk that way

We live on a single track lane with no parking. The only access will be walking down our lane, past our houses. I am guessing there will be 200 to 300 guests by the size of marquee.

We are in a neighbours Whatsapp group. All they needed to say was
'It's going to be a bit busy and noisy on Saturday, our DC is getting married. It should be finished around 11:30pm'

So we're all poshos in my neighbourhood. The correct etiquette is -

a) inform
b) invite the neighbours for a drink in the marquee the next day.

(My posho neighbours also threw in shagging al fresco in the field at 3 in the morning, but tbf, from what I gather it was their guests, not immediate family, so there is no accounting for folk.)

Music still going on. Sounds like the techno set.

Doesn't sound like 'New York, New York' will be coming on any time soon

I think you can expect noise until 3. Out in earplugs & play white noise.

Ooh new yorkkkkkkkkkk

it's a one off, hope they have a great event

I Understand your perspectives and frustrations,

@Pipsquiggle yes it is! I'm such a festival lover I thought I'd missed out on one! I even googled to check. Looks like you aren't the only one with party loving neighbours 😉

They are walking past your house, down a lane, not through your front room
Dear God, the attitude and assumptions here are incredible

🤣🤣

We got married in the in-law’s garden last summer with a very similar set up - single track road, marquee in the garden.

They let their immediate neighbours know months in advance so they could plan accordingly. Luckily, all of the neighbours loved it as they were all cheering when I arrived for the ceremony. However, we wouldn’t want to surprise them the day by just having the wedding, totally unfair.

Although the marquee looks huge, they can only hold 50ish people, so it may be 100 person wedding! We had three big tipis for 125 guests.

Have you ever been to a wedding that finished at 10pm?

@Tiani4 I would be like you and out watching them arrive. It’s one day . Why would people consider staying elsewhere? As for neighbours who try to disrupt celebrations with fires and noise it’s pathetic and childish .

What time did it finally quieten down OP?

Some of the posts on here have been mind boggling on their craziness but I guess that’s the joy of AIBU.

In their

Oh this is ridiculously prim ^.

OP, I don’t know how recently you organised a wedding but ‘let local WhatsApp group know’ is exactly the sort of task that falls down different people’s long list of tasks.

Traffic and noise stuff is always annoying but unless this is a regular event, and it sounds as though it isn’t, just be understanding, let it roll off your back and your life will be better for it. This is small stuff so don’t sweat it, especially for a nice occasion like a wedding.

Oh for heavens sakes!
For everyone getting upset on OPs behalf, it’s a family wedding. It’s one night in the year and clearly a very special occasion for them.
Yes it’s a late one and sleep may have been disturbed but it’s one night!
It’s not like they are hosting illegal raves every weekend!!

We live in hearing distance of a park that was recently refurbished and given a licence to hold occasional weekend music festivals. We had a formal letter months ago giving us notice of two music festivals they're holding in September, details of timing, volume allowed etc. I suspect we're further from this park than you are from these neighbours. So if people receiving money to run loud events are required to tell everyone a couple of miles around then no YANBU. Imagine if you all did this!

Just out of interest what would have been the difference if you'd had more notice? Would you have actually paid to stay somewhere else? If so why didn't you do that when you first knew about it yesterday morning?

If it's purely the point about social etiquette then I accept it would have preferable but if generally they're ok I would get over it. It's one day.

You could have spent yesterday buying ear plugs ...

Wow. So glad I don't live in a tiny place like this.
Yes it would be polite.
But hey, it's one day. Presumably they don't hold weddings all the time 🤷🏻‍♀️
Maybe you could be a bit more relaxed. Deep breaths OP.

Well if they don't have the manners to tell you, you don't need to let them know anything either...you can soon have a neighbour issue. Falling out with neighbours is pretty serious if you ever want to sell.

Our neighbours are doing loud and lengthy building works. Not a problem for us but I wouldn't have been too impressed if they hadn't mentioned it at all. It's just good manners to let people know this stuff will be happening and approx end time, consider impacts on parking etc.

But you've answered your own question OP. If they truly don't get on with one set of neighbours then they would have been fools to give advanced notice as the troublesome set likely would have complained and tried to stop it. They shouldn't risk their own child's wedding day because you have a preference to have had advanced warning! Ye Gods!

Whilst it would have been polite, they had no requirement to tell you and the What's app group sound like they would have started nit picking if they'd been told.
I live in a similar set up, there are often weddings /parties in gardens and no one gets prior notice or bats an eyelid, same as they don't if we are kept up all night by farmers harvesting or cows giving birth.
In addition to the parties we have a nearby giant festival that rocks the house once a year, It's nice to hear people having fun after the joyless lockdowns.

YANBU! It's common courtesy.

Hope the noise stopped at a reasonable time OP.

Well you'd imagine that they would also have had to inform the neighbours about these things too. Except for the Tesco delivery. That's probably something that you can keep quite about.