To be proud of how I dealt with this? TW indecent exposure.

[205wanker]

Today I had walked my puppy and she'd settled and fallen asleep so I took advantage of the moment (if I'd headed home she be doing puppy parkour and I wouldn't have been able to concentrate on the important Mumsnet daily chores.

A car pulled up and parked in the other side of the car park and a mid 20s male got out and started wandering around as though waiting for someone. I did the obvious and didn't make eye contact but I was aware of his presence, and he of mine.

After a short while he moved his car alongside to mine, facing the same way, I thought nothing of it as he'd moved it from a sunny space to a shaded spot.

He then was hanging around the front of his car I thought still waiting to be joined by someone.

Realisation dawned and he's there stroking his penis.

I immediately put phone into record mode and started filming him, sadly I didn't catch the act.

He jumped in his car and gesticulated "what's your issue" at me.

I wound down the window and asked him if he enjoyed intimidating women.

"I was only having a piss"

"no no you were stroking it"

"I didn't know you were in there"

"yes you did, you really did"

"you've got black out windows"

"only on the back, you knew full well I was there"

"I was only having a piss"

"you were doing it deliberately, it's all on dash cam and on this recording - old women don't stand for this shit these days"

He then sped off. And I stopped recording.

I followed him, absolutely raging. No idea what I hoped to achieve but the adrenalin was flowing.

I caught up with him at some lights but lost him after he did and illegal turn after he spotted me.

While at the lights I'd pulled badly over a keep clear area to keep up with him, and a woman trying to get into McDonald's gave me the eyebrow, so I rolled down the window and told her I was following a man who'd just flashed at me. She understood.

I've had lots of glorious puppy cuddles and feel like it's not even going to affect my well being for more than a moment of time, though his face and hairless groin keeps flitting into my consciousness.

I'm at the hairdressers atm, I'll call 101 asaic. His car is taxed, mot-ed and insured so he's likely to be traced, if the police decide to investigate.

Not really sure why I'm posting here but I'm so fucking proud of how I feel. Angry, amused(the old women comment still giving me the chortle), proud that it hasn't
affected my mental state like the previous 4 similar incidents, which left me scared and anxious.

So AIBU to be proud of not letting this gutter critter intimidate me?

Well done, OP. I've been flashed several times - the first time while walking home alone from primary school aged about 10 - so I'm cheering you on for standing up to him. I hope the police take it seriously.

Bloody good for you! I bet he absolutely shat himself, the dirty animal.

Please report it and with the dash cam evidence if you have his registration . Make sure they take it seriously .

I have read numerous times that murders start of with stuff like flashing / exposing themselves to women before going further

No man wakes up and thinks they are going to murder / rape a women today and have not done other stuff previously .

There is pretty much always many other incidents that are smaller and not taken notice off sometimes years before anything more serious happens

Wayne Couzens murder of Sarah Everard is a perfect example

@JemimaHumdrum Yes all of that and what @Pennox said:

This is what Wayne Couzens was doing the week or two before he murderer Sarah Everard. Well done OP, perhaps it will make him thibk twice about escalating his behaviour, as they always do when they get away with it.

Proud of you OP!

I'm cheering, you're absolutely brilliant! Fuck the mild responses, they get us nothing but more harassment and assault.

I've done something similar, a creep came up to my (open) car window when I was waiting at a red light and had his dick out then laughingly called me a bitch when I didn't engage. I saw red, to this day I have no idea what came over me, and left my still-running car at the lights to chase him down the street. Kicked his ankle out from under him and watched him faceplant into the cement. Legged it back to my car before he could get up obviously, I'm not that brave. I'll never regret doing it and I wish every woman could experience that surge of adrenaline. It's life-changing.

Well done, OP! Ignore those trying to piss on your chips, some people can't bear to see someone rightly proud of themselves without trying to ruin it - jealousy I expect.

You did completely the right thing

Hope they go after him for flashing

Maybe if more 'flashing' men got metaphorically booted up the bollocks they'd behave better.

Well done OP!

That's one embarrassed cockwomble out there tonight! Let's hope he gets a votis from the police soon

Well done OP. As others have said, this behaviour is very often the prelude to even worse sex offending. You'd hope that the police take more notice of that after Wayne Couzens and you've saved other women from being targeted.

Well done you! I wish I had had your courage when a drunk man our with his mates got his penis out in front of me on a late night train.. I told him to put it away... We then pulled into the station and a couple sitting behind me took me to my taxi...

Thank you for your service op!

👏 👏 👏

@Ponoka7

Eh?!

“You had no business following him”

are you missing the missing the bit where he subjected her to indecent exposure??! In doing so he made himself her business.

That kind of passive, ignoring, turning a blind, sweeping under the carpet has really not helped women over the years has it?!

Women are at a point now where they can and will retaliate to such heinous acts

Nah

Well done! I hope he’s sitting at home, feeling sick with fear that there’ll be a knock at the door any second.

Bravo OP. Straighten your crown.

I think you could have spared us knowledge of his ‘hairless groin’ though. 😱😂

I like to think that if I found myself in this situation, I’d put my best Miss Jean Brodie voice on and say “Put it away. nobody wants to see that!”

@gamerchick

But your comment is just not welcome on this thread.

Why aren’t you championing a woman who has taken a stand against a sexually aggressive man??? That is what you should be doing rather than trying to pick holes in Op, she did not speed or do any turn or anything like that, she followed him in order to help him realise that the shite he pulled is completely unacceptable.

You be meek and mild all you want, but I think based on this thread you’re in the minority…and hallelujah for that!!

I am laughing at the suggestion that OP should have responded with more dignity when someone was flashing his dick at her. Must we always judged on our behaviour like this? Even when dealing with perverts?

Victim blaming at its finest.

Or reporting a crime while it was happening on 999 would have been more useful and would have given you more protection than chasing him.

Well done op. I would've done the same . I'm absolutely sick to death of these filthy perverts .

The fact that the OP did something is to be applauded, I think.

Well done OP. As many others have said this is how the Wayne Couzens of the world start out.