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Seen my friends husband on Bumble
155

Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:08

I seen my friends husband on Bumble on Friday night
I made video screen shot of entire profile - verified and fully filled out

I was at their wedding four years ago, she was fairly smug with how well their relationship had gone. Engaged after a short period of time, and married after 1 year. They met the week after she had a 6 year relationship ending and they did seem literally perfect for each other.

I tend to stay away from gossip but neither she or anyone else have intimated their relationship has broken down.
I have told no one I know about the dating profile.

AIBU to leave it and feel its none of my business?

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Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

balalake · 06/06/2022 13:09

Tell him you've seen it.

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Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:13

balalake · 06/06/2022 13:09

Tell him you've seen it.

Good plan. Just forward the video and say - ‘not sure if this is a fake profile’?

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disco82 · 06/06/2022 13:13

Tell her. I told a friend, she thanked me, chose to stay with him anyway and I haven't heard from her since. But at least she knew and wasn't being made a fool of, and could make her own decisions.

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disco82 · 06/06/2022 13:14

I wouldn't tell him! You'll give him time to come up with an excuse. Your loyalty is to her not him!

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PuffinMcStuffin · 06/06/2022 13:16

If you like and respect her tell her the facts directly. Otherwise forget the information completely.

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purpleboy · 06/06/2022 13:16

I wouldn't suggest a fake profile, you'd be handing him his excuse on a plate.
How close is your friend?

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FlippityFlapperty · 06/06/2022 13:17

Don’t tell him - he’ll delete it and then you’ll only have to tell her anyway or she won’t know she’s with a lying shitbag. Send it to her anonymously if you can’t face telling her, but definitely tell her. At least give her the option of divorcing him. Hopefully they don’t have kids yet.

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WouldBeGood · 06/06/2022 13:19

Tell her.

i was told and in some ways it was a relief, though terrible

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Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:19

purpleboy · 06/06/2022 13:16

I wouldn't suggest a fake profile, you'd be handing him his excuse on a plate.
How close is your friend?

Fairly close
They have no children

She is in a friendship group and in March I seen one of their fiances on it too. So it will be the second guy I have seen in their friendship group on Bumble. They must think I am some sort of Bumble CIA

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DrinkFeckArseBrick · 06/06/2022 13:23

If it was an acquaintance or you were good friends with him then I'd stay out of it. But given you are calling her a friend and you were close enough to attend her wedding then I think you have to tell her. I can't imagine a fairly good friend knowing this and not telling me. In a way you may be damned if you do and damned if you don't so I think in this case just choose what is the right thing to do. And I think the right thing isnt keeping it a secret. She could be exposed to STIs or anything

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minipie · 06/06/2022 13:23

Did you tell her about the friend’s fiance being on Bumble?

If I was her, I would want to be told. Especially as they don’t have children. Tell her quick before she gets pregnant by the cheater.

Don’t tell him, all that does is give him a chance to prepare his story as pp said.

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AlwaysLatte · 06/06/2022 13:23

Absolutely tell her, not him.

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ShaneTwane · 06/06/2022 13:26

Please tell her otherwise she's being betrayed twice.

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Seraphinesupport · 06/06/2022 13:27

i would tell her annonymously, either email it froma new email or somehow send it to her using fake details. a simple thought you should know hes an arse.

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worraliberty · 06/06/2022 13:28

PuffinMcStuffin · 06/06/2022 13:16

If you like and respect her tell her the facts directly. Otherwise forget the information completely.

It doesn't sound as though she likes or respects her judging by the opening post.

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seaUrchinOne · 06/06/2022 13:28

Is it possible they could of split up? I would mention to her, not him

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Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:29

Seraphinesupport · 06/06/2022 13:27

i would tell her annonymously, either email it froma new email or somehow send it to her using fake details. a simple thought you should know hes an arse.

I could do it this way
just checked their social media - seems very together still

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FatTum · 06/06/2022 13:31

just beware that it can go horribly wrong

i saw one of my friend's husbands on Happn when I was single. She wasn't a close friend but someone who I knew through a much closer friend of mine.

I told her (the wife) and then got ostracised for causing trouble. Was told I was making it up. I got blocked by the wife and she sent me a message to say I must have been mistaken and how cruel it was to cause so much heartache to someone and how it must have been a fake profile because it was nothing to do with him!

I never heard any more but apparently they are still together (and it was definitely him and I don't think it was fake either as I used to see him on the train and on his phone and that's when Happn was pinging to say he was close!).

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IssaBaby · 06/06/2022 13:32

Bumble CIA ahahahahaha

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geojellyfish · 06/06/2022 13:32

Surely he would have heard about mutual friend's fiancé? Seems all the more odd that he likely knows you're on it and might see him.

Is there any reason your friend might be inclined to test your loyalty?

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Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:33

FatTum · 06/06/2022 13:31

just beware that it can go horribly wrong

i saw one of my friend's husbands on Happn when I was single. She wasn't a close friend but someone who I knew through a much closer friend of mine.

I told her (the wife) and then got ostracised for causing trouble. Was told I was making it up. I got blocked by the wife and she sent me a message to say I must have been mistaken and how cruel it was to cause so much heartache to someone and how it must have been a fake profile because it was nothing to do with him!

I never heard any more but apparently they are still together (and it was definitely him and I don't think it was fake either as I used to see him on the train and on his phone and that's when Happn was pinging to say he was close!).

Its really shit isnt it
you do not want to cause trounle but it was there plaon as day

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Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:33

geojellyfish · 06/06/2022 13:32

Surely he would have heard about mutual friend's fiancé? Seems all the more odd that he likely knows you're on it and might see him.

Is there any reason your friend might be inclined to test your loyalty?

Lol no 😂
I think she aould be too busy for that shite / drama

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Nopetryagain · 06/06/2022 13:37

Calling her smug is a bit off OP even if true.

Telling her is the right thing to do even when you might be shot as the messenger.

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geojellyfish · 06/06/2022 13:38

You described her as being smug about the relationship though, which isn't how I would describe a good friend's happiness. I suppose I just wonder whether she had intuited the way you feel about the relationship or heard from mutual friends and was trying to gauge your loyalty.

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Curlyhairdonotcare · 06/06/2022 13:40

Nopetryagain · 06/06/2022 13:37

Calling her smug is a bit off OP even if true.

Telling her is the right thing to do even when you might be shot as the messenger.

She admitted it herself that she was smug 😂 thats how he described herself - ‘I am so smug that it just happened for me with my first Tinder match a week after my and ex broke up’

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