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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What should I do if anything: DS friend's mom farted in front of the boys and there's a whole group chat about it

227 replies

Evangeli · 03/06/2022 20:27

This is actually not as light-hearted as seems.

DS16 friend's mom "Sally" is lovely woman, known them for years, have had dinners and so on at each other's places. We are also friends. We sometimes go on occasional walks with each other. She has mentioned she has digestive issues and can't go on long walks needs the washroom.

On one of these walks, "Sally" gave a really loud fart- there was silence and we talked about other things. Stupid stupid me later texted my DD (who also knows the family well) just as laugh "went for a walk with Sally she farted really loudly haha" and DD responded "omg haha" and that was that.

Fast forward a couple of months later- a couple of the boys were having a sleepover at their place (not DS- I had picked him up earlier), and apparently they heard her fart loudly and obviously found that hilarious. DS told me about it and they simply seem unable to stop talking about it- literally made a group chat named after her fart and just ridiculous silliness.

My involvement is that in the context of that conversation with DS, I happened to mention the earlier fart on the walk and made the stupid mistake of showing my text with DD "see- she does that- it's not a big deal", and before I could stop him, DS took my phone, screenshotted the text and sent it to the group chat so now I basically added fuel to the fire and I feel awful.
Also awful if the poor boy whose mother it is finds out, and if/when Sally will see my text.
We live in a small town and this is the entertainment we have, except it actually does bother me and I yelled at DS and told him he violated my privacy (he does not make a habit of screenshotting my texts).

I am actually bothered by this even though I have real life problems this is living rent-free in my head as the young 'uns say.

is there anything I can do to mitigate this situation.

OP posts:
Dee00 · 03/06/2022 22:51

I wouldn’t stress too much, if Sally is as lovely as you say she will see the funny side. Just be honest, tell her you mentioned to your kids about her epic trumps and they find it hilarious.
If it was me I would not care!

HereIAmBrainTheSizeOfAPlanet · 03/06/2022 22:53

kickingupdaisies · 03/06/2022 22:18

OP, you are not a bully. I don't know why posters - I have only read the first page - are being so poisonous and OTT, but that is Mumsnet vipers for you! Although I have no actual advice, please don't take anyone's online 'advice' too seriously!!!

🧦

Rogue1001MNer · 03/06/2022 22:55

HereIAmBrainTheSizeOfAPlanet · 03/06/2022 22:51

@Evangeli where have you gone?

Busy sock puppeting hiding

Horriblewoman · 03/06/2022 22:55

Three years ago I accidentally passed wind at a dinner party after a very rich meal while under investigation for a digestive issue. Clearly the fact I still remember it this many years later tells you how I felt.

If a group of people set up a group (I don't care if they're teenagers) I would be incredibly upset. You and your son's behaviour is disgusting.

TonyBlairsLover · 03/06/2022 22:56

Lmao what Tf did I just read

kateandme · 03/06/2022 22:58

And those saying Sally won't care.one of the BIGGEST THINGS with digestive issues is the shame people suffer and they do very much care.to the point of depression and social anxiety.the fear of others witnessing how your gut treats you is horrifying.every day.so this would be awful for Sally.

TonyBlairsLover · 03/06/2022 23:00

Anyone else here from Reddit?

MushyPeasPrincess · 03/06/2022 23:01

FiveShelties · 03/06/2022 21:01

Do pop back OP when you have a second. I would hate you to miss all the responses to your AIBU.

Quite.

I suspect OP is enjoying sitting back and watching their half term efforts at getting Mumsnet frothing but in the tiny chance this is real, OP you are a bitchy classless bully.

Iwantmyoldnameback · 03/06/2022 23:02

How small is this town you all live in? Have you all been inbreeding for generations? You all sound completely pathetic.

PaddingtonBearStareAgain · 03/06/2022 23:04

BetterCallBarry · 03/06/2022 20:58

Is everyone pretending that they wouldn't mention to a family member if someone did a really loud fart in public?!

I probably would've told my mum and everyone inlived with.

Have a sense of humour!

Outside in the open you would have to fart really loud to be heard. Bowel issues or not I would've found it hilarious.

No I wouldn't because I'm not 5 years old.

Freddiefox · 03/06/2022 23:06

You’re not really worried about Sally and her feelings, your worried about being shown up on the village and having no defence.

Walkingalot · 03/06/2022 23:09

You're fecked. Well done. Not helpful I know.

ToppTotty · 03/06/2022 23:09

The idea that a group of teenage boys would be that fascinated by someone farting doesn't seem very plausible to me...

bluecactus · 03/06/2022 23:12

OP, was it a wet fart or a dry one?

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 03/06/2022 23:15

GrazingSheep · 03/06/2022 20:32

The apple didn’t fall far from the tree.

They're doing exactly what you did OP, is agree!

Jedsnewstar · 03/06/2022 23:27

and before I could stop him, DS took my phone, screenshotted the text and sent it to the group chat

That would take significantly longer than taking the phone back or telling him to stop.

SoupDragon · 03/06/2022 23:28

Stupid stupid me later texted my DD (who also knows the family well) just as laugh "went for a walk with Sally she farted really loudly haha" and DD responded "omg haha" and that was that.

My involvement is that in the context of that conversation with DS, I happened to mention the earlier fart on the walk and made the stupid mistake of showing my text with DD "see- she does that- it's not a big deal"

why the fuck would you do either of those things? Do you often mock those with medical issues?

Beautiful3 · 03/06/2022 23:30

You were mean to have sent that to your daughter. You should tell your son to delete the group chat because you feel bad for your friend.

SheldonesqueTheBstard · 03/06/2022 23:31

I’m with Maireas

And my inner Nan has surfaced.

What should I do if anything: DS friend's mom farted in front of the boys and there's a whole group chat about it
Rewis · 03/06/2022 23:35

Wow. Everyone except Sally is a complete immature asshole. What you can do is to learn a lesson where you dont report about people's farts and keep your thoughts to yourself. And talk with your son (16yo is too old for this type of shit) about being sensitive to people's medical condition and how to not be a bully and how to stand up against similar assholes like him and his friends who make group chats about this type of things.

DoorWasAJar · 03/06/2022 23:42

stairgates · 03/06/2022 20:32

If Sally is happy trumping away then I'm sure she will see the humour in a group of lads been so in awe of her skills😂I wouldn't worry too much about it

What makes you think she’s happy about it? She has a digestive illness that limits her mobility. I don’t think most people are happy to be ill, do you?!

herewithmyfrog · 03/06/2022 23:44

Iwantmyoldnameback · 03/06/2022 23:02

How small is this town you all live in? Have you all been inbreeding for generations? You all sound completely pathetic.

I was wondering the same.
Some village somewhere is obviously over-run with idiots.

I'm guessing this is a troll though.

Mammyloveswine · 03/06/2022 23:48

What a nasty thread op! I assume you have never farted?!

Ffs
!

Noname1999 · 03/06/2022 23:50

Wow someone had a bodily function - big deal. Why did you have to turn it into a thing?

Happymum12345 · 03/06/2022 23:56

You did something you now regret. I would apologise, beautiful bunch of flowers and be nicer in the future. Everyone makes mistakes.